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Anonymously

Date posted: 4y

so i had a really bad panic attack ocd spiral this past august it was like three that month that eventually led me down the path of ocd diagnosis and doing ERPs with a therapist through this app I started doing 7s on my hierarchy and then moved up to my 8s and 9s ... once i got to my 9 which was recording myself saying maybe im a p*** and was able to finally do that a few times i was feeling really confident it took me months to get there but i finally got to my 9 however my amount of sessions with my therapist on here ended in terms of face to face sessions and once i didnt have to report back to her on how many i did in a week i just let it all slide and didnt do any for almost a whole month now i started doing my 9s again but im finding my anxiety at night and the morning are getting really bad again like it had been in august which had got a lot better when i was being consistant with my ERPs...i also am turning 29 this weekend and have some existential themes as well i havent worked on and they are spiking right now its not even as much that my pocd theme is worse but just in general i guess once you stop practicing sitting with your anxiety after triggering yourself on purpose when triggers happen on their own it is so much harder to sit with them than before because youre out of practice but i guess what worried me is it doesnt make sense because my intrusive thoughts have been of pocd more frequently since i went a month not doing erps but mostly at night my fears of death and dying alone and something being wrong with me and im broken and will i ever have a relationship will i ever have love and hocd stuff are the loudest or most overwhelming not my pocd but i guess i have worked on that theme the most and also my friend is setting me up on a date and thats a lot of change im turning 29 and i avoid dating and romance like the plague and like my hocd and existential stuff with dating and my birthday coming up im just used to staying in my comfort zone and having the same routine and being alone and its overwhelming anyway i just wanted to vent but i actually agreed to a date and im turning 29 and so i guess for eocd and hocd thats gonna trigger a lot plus i slipped up on my pocd erps so yeah i hate change and i hate getting older and i hate dating so many things could go wrong im wondering if i should get on zoloft just because i really am having a hard time imagining me on these dates without something to help me not freak out

pureolife

Date posted: 4y

I think you should restart therapy! And this time, come up with a solid maintenance plan that you stick to after your sessions are up. You could also get back into therapy with a workbook, like the mindfulness workbook for ocd. Meds can help dampen the anxiety a bit, but without erp, and if you continue to do mental compulsions, the ocd will likely still worsen. Keep doing the work! I know it’s hard to jump back in. Also: going straight to a 9 when you’ve been out of practice may just be too much too fast. Go back and do some 7s and 8s. And remember to be patient with yourself. Create a schedule, stick to it as if you had a therapist to report to, and track your progress.

Anonymously

Date posted: 4y

thanks for the advice and support means a lot 🙏💕

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