NSFW Been dealing with stuff again. Unfortunately, I feel into compulsions. I have a memory of watching a video on pornhub of an 18+ year old who looked youngish. I am not exactly sure on the details, but it seems either I assumed he was his age, or I was unsure but watched it anyway (not into guys btw so it wouldn’t be attraction to him) if I was unsure of his age I probably would have been a minor myself but idk how young I could have thought he was.

Yeah I feel that. It’s a pretty popular male star too and there were comments about him looking young.

@mitz You have quit pornography though, right? I feel like we have the same worries when it comes to real event or POCD. Whichever one you have or both even

@BigGip09 I try but still look at it sometimes, it only creates problems though, like I’ll be looking at normal stuff and my mind is telling me I’m looking for cp. Also today I was looking for a pornstars age because she looked kind of young, and while it was loading I touched my groinal area and even though I pulled back I felt kind of gross (even though I wasn’t looking at anything bad)

@mitz Yeah well, it sounds like you're checking. Please stop that. It's gonna create more problems than it's worth. It doesn't help anything, especially after you just said it's causing problems just by going to porn sites. But I'm not faulting you for wanting to go on porn sites or having the urge to watch it. I've unintentionally came across softcore porn on instagram and while I'll admit I enjoyed what I was looking at, I stopped myself just so I could get away from the urges, you know?

@BigGip09 Yeah I know what you mean. I think yesterday and this morning taught me that I really need to stop looking at porn, for the very least at the time being. I remember you mentioned an app that you used where you tracked that? What was it called again?

@mitz I'm glad you asked! It's called Brainbuddy. So far I'm 11 days clean, and I'm going for 2 weeks. It's honestly worth it and I'm happy I've decided to do this. Don't get me wrong, these urges are going to come up. It's still only the beginning. Your body is going to want to BADLY crave that you need to watch some porn. That just tells you right there that porn alone is an addictive drug. But when you keep fighting those urges day by day, you will feel better. I'm only like 6% rewired according to the app, so it's a long journey ahead.

@BigGip09 Alright, well I’m glad I know all this going in. Think I’ll download the app

@BigGip09 You should also get some tips as to what to do if you're under a heavy urge to give in. The app can help with this too. And you can journal.

@mitz I hope it helps you, man

@BigGip09 Thanks