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Anonymous I already did this. I actually did this for anyone I cared of and even for myself. Half of yourself feels like you MUST do it and the other half tells you that you Must not do it, this contradiction leads to a mental over pressure period that becomes unbearable. But once you did your "test" you feel guilty af. I know how it is I already experienced this shit. I'm actually still experiencing this but in an other way (magical thoughts or being afraid of saying awful things aloud while being listened by a hacker who could hurt me). Pray, talk to a specialist, don't feel alone and don't fear to talk when you're in confidence with someone or some people. It's important to literraly drain your thoughts to feel healthier.
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Thank you Morpheus, your words mean a lot and is kind of helping me feel stable. It was over 2 months ago this happened and I am not taking this well.....I talked to a counselor and they said it wasn't sexual assault but I don't know what to think about it......I think I did something wrong and there is no way to take it back.....I was and still am suicidal.....I never in my lifetime wanted to think I did something that was considered improper to sn animal....I can't get an image out of my head......I am not sleeping the same st night....I often think of suicide but your words are helping me......I think I have magical thinking too...I am not well......thank you...you have helped me get a little farther away from a very dark place........please stay in contact with me.
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@Anonymous I wonder if part of this is schizophrenia or schizoaffective didorder......I often used to be fearful if people could hear my thoughts and such and thought that might not have been normal like schizophrenia or something.
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What do you mean about your cat, did you hurt him accidentally, or did you check that you wouldn't hurt like you did something to him that wasn't purposely done to hurt him but now you feel guilty about it because you're scared he felt something about your ocd checking ?
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yeah...the second part......please don't judge harsh because you probably don't understand....I am on the brink.
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Hey, so I worry a lot about if I sinned. If you want, my Instagram is @asquazzo. I saw some of me in you, and I know what it's like to feel that God isn't gonna help me. I'm learning that He still loves me, but I still hate a lot of the things I do. But I have been able to improve.
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Maybe I am extra cautious but I shared something extra sensitive so there kind of is a reason I stay anonymous.....I would like to chat though but I guess it's best if left on here because its stressful (more than stressful and mind bending fear to say the least) to think your going to hell or have unforgiven sin and such.....it would be great to chat on here though....sorry for taking a long time to get back...
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