Ugh i watched this Megan fox interview as ERP , she looks back at herself from when she was 14. In this movie she was wearing a very low neck top and I randomly glanced at her chest and then I glanced again being like “that’s a LOW top “. I feel like I did something horribly wrong . OCD says it sexual abuse .

Like idk . I don’t even know my intentions the second time . I remember wanting not to look there looking at her noticing the low cut top and looking there like two more times . Idk if I’m just hyper aware cuz I was so anxious she was 14. I mean people usually look when people wear very low cut tops in trying m to see my intentions and whether that’s sexual abuse

@annonyymouss and how old are you? when it happened

Like the second time it was like I was looking at her face noticed her low top looked and was like DONT LOOK looked at her face and then like WHAT IF YOU WANNA SEE HER CHEST DO YOU LIKE HER and looking at her chest . Maybe I’m just overly cautious of my own glance but what if I wanted to look?

I dont see how it is sexual assault, you looked at her chest, I probably would, though im not at an illegal age to do so.

@annonyymouss But my point is I dont think its sexual assault, I dont think youre a bad person either, the most you could be called is a horny dog, though I wouldnt call you that either. Everyone looks at breast sometimes

@Sizmix It’s weird cuz I’m not even actually attracted to 14 year olds. I’m just really really scared of being attracted to 14 year olds .

@annonyymouss If youre not older than early 16 I dont see a problem but, just try not to think about it tell yourself you arent a pedophile and just try to move on, if it comes back again, repeat.

@Sizmix I didn’t look out of attraction though . Like there was no attraction to her . I think I was probably just over aware of my own eye movements . So any random glance that people wouldn’t notice I’d notice . It’s called pedophile ocd where you’d be scared of being attracted to someone you’re not even attracted to .

See idk . It mainly happens in real life where I don’t wanna look at kids innapropriately and I actually don’t look at them innapropriately. But sometimes it happens with videos . I don’t know it’s so weird . Like I’m constantly scared that I’ll check out a child or look at a child innapropriately despite not being attracted to them

@annonyymouss Yea, this actually does happen to me in real life where i dont want to look but im so focused on it that i do and it makes me feel awful, but i think that it doesn’t really mean that you’ve done something awful ur just overly focused on looking or not looking

@gabi Like with POCD ? like I have this fear of traumatizing children and that they’d be traumatized by my gaze . I don’t actually look in real life I don’t think . I think I’m just really hyper aware of my gaze . Like with the whole Megan fox thing I think it’s natural for anyone to look when someone’s wearing that low of a top and that it’s nothing sexual. And people’s eyes always move across a screen so maybe it’s just that ? I keep ruminating on whether or not I’m staring because I’m scared staring will traumatize children

@annonyymouss yeah, unfortunately with pocd, and every other theme ive had rlly. I dont want to reassure u too much but you cant traumatise children through a screen and you wouldn’t think twice about it if u weren’t so hyper aware ..

@gabi I’m more scared that this will End up happening in real life and then the child will be traumatized