- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
@nicolep123 it’s just a thought. Don’t entangle with it. Don’t look for reassurance because it won’t help you. Trust the uncertainty. It may seem like you are “questioning” or even want to know what “questioning is” so you can eliminate that’s what this is. It won’t matter. Your anxiety and OCD will still come back. Trust me. I know. Accept and trust the uncertainty that this OCD and NOT you “questioning.” Im here if you need to talk.
- Date posted
- 6y
I get it. I really do. The amount of hours I’ve spent researching to make myself feel better, I’ve lost so much time but energy and all it did was delay the thoughts for a few hours. For now, if you really want a way to cope, imagine yourself walking a plank on a pirate ship, when a thought comes in, you have 3 options to answer, you’re uncertain of the answer, but if you’re wrong or don’t answer, you’re pushed off the plank, if you’re right, you’re spared. The wise part of your brain will come into play.
- Date posted
- 6y
I know. I’m in the same boat. But you have to trust the uncertainty. Don’t stop dating. Live your life the way you did before this happened. I’ve been going through this for 4 months now. I have felt so much better in the last month to month and a half so tonight I decided to do some ERP and go on a date. I’m freaking out. I haven’t been on this app in like 4 weeks until today. But I have to trust the uncertainty.
- Date posted
- 6y
Yes. It means you are just letting it be and not putting any stock into it because it’s not you. But I bet when you notice it doesn’t give you any reaction, you start to panic wondering if you like those thoughts now? Which in turn is another thought.....
- Date posted
- 6y
Which by definition is an intrusive thought because it makes you feel like hell.
- Date posted
- 6y
i am someone who in the past suffered from hocd and recovered. it was only after my recovery did i begin to feel true feelings of attraction, and i realized i am bi. but the way i feel about both men and women are so different from what my ocd made me feel. hocd is painful, and it’s so upsetting. my real attraction has never felt this way. so what i’m trying to say is, questioning your sexuality does not feel like what you are experiencing, i am sure of this. maybe one day you may question your sexuality, but that is not what is happening now. right now you are experiencing ocd
- Date posted
- 6y
well i’m scared that what happened to you will happen to me. i don’t want to be bi or gay i just want to be straight. i just can’t stop doubting i have ocd
- Date posted
- 6y
before you had hocd were you ever super attracted to me ?
- Date posted
- 6y
like i don’t want to question my sexuality
- Date posted
- 6y
@Jake12. thank you so much that really helped i just barely have a reaction to these thoughts so it’s hard for me to know if it’s my hocd or not
- Date posted
- 6y
The question to answer is “Is this real or one of those thoughts that aren’t real and causes me anxiety.”
- Date posted
- 6y
thank you @Jake12. i really hope this is all ocd and not me. now i’m obsessing that after i recover from this that i will become bi or gay.
- Date posted
- 6y
so if i don’t have a reaction to these thoughts is that a good thing?
- Date posted
- 6y
yes i always worry that i enjoy them and stuff like that
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I need too know that I'm not insane, really. I am 16 and for the past two weeks, this has been completely ruining my health and happiness. I only recently came out as a lesbian like 3 months ago after a lot of confusion about my attraction since I used to think I liked men. At first, I felt so sure that I liked women, but lately, I've been having these unwanted thoughts about the possibility of liking men. I never used to feel this way, but now, every time I look at a man, my brain obsessively fixates on it. It forces me to imagine kissing him, loving him, things I don’t want, and then tries to convince me that I do. It’s painful. The thought of this fills me with fear and anxiety, leading to panic attacks and breakdowns. I don’t want these thoughts. I hate them with every fiber of my being, but I’m terrified that one day I’ll act on them and somehow like it. I used to think I liked men, but back then, I was in a very unhealthy space in a time of escapism and something deeply parasocial. I’ve only ever liked the attention and validation a man could give me, but these experiences are somehow treated as further proof that I’m "bisexual." I’ve never been in a real relationship with anyone, which makes my brain constantly challenge me—telling me, “You don’t even know what love feels like.” It won’t shut up. It keeps obsessively trying to make me prove that I’m a lesbian, testing my reactions and questioning my certainty. Is this normal?
- Date posted
- 16w
I really dont know if it is ocd anymore I dont want certain sexual things with my bf anymore that i used to like When i envision it with a girl it is so easy to envision and it feels like i want that , that will give me the satisfaction This feeling is making me really question if i am still into men , desire men sexually Is this still ocd , i really dont know anymore , as it is a feeling it is too real
- Date posted
- 12w
Last night I took my meds to help me sleep and I kept waking up throughout the night with thoughts like “I’m really a lesbian now” or “I’m ok with it now, this is what I prefer”. I really feel like everyday for a couple of days now, I’ve woken up feeling more and more like my preferences have completely changed. The first few days was major anxiety, panic attacks, then I had a really bad double-bind and reversal spiral, and I became a little bit calmer since then. Now I feel like I’m managing the thoughts without anxiety or panic like I’m used to, but now it feels like I really want them and that I’m ok with it. Like I don’t care anymore. But the thing is, in between all of the mini spiral episodes I’ve had, I had these little moments of clarity like “I’m not giving up on my fantasies of men” or “I’ve always wanted men, that doesn’t just change”. But last night I’ve had really sexual dreams that I’m having trouble interpreting. I had one where I think it was me sleeping with a guy, but I woke up frantically because I think the roles got reversed, but I’m not sure. Another one I was a random woman with a husband, but I think the roles got reversed again so I woke up immediately. Both times it felt like arousal. Obviously I still care somewhat if I’m still here asking, but my brain or maybe me (I’m really not sure anymore) is telling me that I’m a lesbian now and I prefer it. It’s like I don’t care and want it now. It’s like I’m not even feeling confusion about it. I don’t know if it’s because of the meds, I’ve been distracted (family in town), because I’m in maybe quieter stages after two bad spiral episodes, or because I’ve really changed. It’s literally like I think being a lesbian will be enjoyable now but I don’t want that, even if my brain (and body apparently) keeps telling me that. I was told that ocd doesn’t change who you are, but now I’m worried that what I thought was background noise leading up to another spiral was suppressed self discovery (I’ve had two major soocd episodes in my life: late high school and now a few years later).
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