My definition of recovery is not having these thoughts because I never had them before. The intrusive thoughts I’ve had before ocd where not towards harming my family. So if this is how it’s going to be with harm thoughts every day then I guess I’m not gonna be recovered.

I’ve lived with OCD since I was 3. I’ve learned that part of recovering is accepting what recovery is. OCD is a chronic condition, and we can’t stop thoughts if we wanted to, and we don’t need to- thoughts are not dangerous, even if we feel they are. When you aspire to cure OCD or eliminate any intrusive thought, this weakens your ability to overcome them. OCD likes to bait you with the belief that its possible, hence you’ll continue doing compulsions. The most effective first step I took toward managing my OCD was accepting that I have it, but that I am not it. It and I can co-exist without it disrupting my life. This doesn’t mean I was immediately cured of it, or even felt relief right away, but practicing this mindset has made the greatest difference over the years. I’ve also learned wallowing and discouraging yourself is never the answer- it’s only going to dig you into a deeper hole.

It’s so hard I know when I started having harm thoughts I prayed and prayed they would stop but the true goal is to have them and not push them away and just seperate yourself from them and then they lose power. It’s because we attach a meaning to the thoughts and identify with them and think it’s a representation of who we are that we start reacting it’s very hard to do because of how intense and graphic the thoughts can be, you aren’t alone and if you can view them as just a neutral thought nothing more over time they just go in the background. ERP really helped me because I became good at letting the thoughts in and not carrying out the compulsion so the exposure started to retrain my mind to have a different reaction and the more I did it the easier it became. I hope things get better!

You can have them but experience no anxiety bc you will know they don't have meaning. The reason why we struggle is giving meaning to them

Well I think I’ve had ocd for years but I’ve only been diagnosed two months ago when I developed hocd but in the past two months I would say I’m maybe like 70% the way there if you want to try and put a number on it