Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Can I ask for prayer? I had a real event OCD and I am not getting completely over it.....I don't know if I am being a perfectionist or what......what I did is hard to explain....with all of what's going on I am on the suicidal side. I feel like I need to talk to a therapist soon....even my old one that is not completely trained in OCD(but not sure if it's a good idea).....I have an appointment the 15th of April...it is hard to wait that long....I am so confused on what I did...what it means....how bad it is, etc....I don't want to trigger others but I am sure some would think what I did was shameful but one person said it wasn't really bad at all.....I have talked about it so much...I can't stand that it happened--I need Gods help.....I am scared God is mad at me.....I have had a ridiculous time w/OCD this last year----

Date posted: 4y

God knows your thoughts even before you do. He knows how your life from beginning to end. He loves you more than you will ever know. God forgives you so you need to forgive yourself and move on. He doesnt want you to worry or feel guilty.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

This doesn't really make me feel better....I am not even sure if I should feel guilty.....I am confused.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous I mean I don't know if you meant to or not but it seems you are insinuating that I should feel guilty......maybe I should....I don't know.....sometimes people on here are pretty hard on others it seems.......maybe you meant well but this makes me feel sick.

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous I think that a better way to think about it would be what I suggested. Let it work itself out. If you want God's help, you got to let Him work

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@anthonys Thanks again...I imagine I should stop this conversation tonight...I would appreciate prayer.... I wish I could talk to you from time to time...but not sure if your comfortable with it......I mean we probably aren't even in the same age bracket....I am pretty old for this group.

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous I followed you on here and I may pop in from time to time.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@anthonys Thanks, please hang in there too.....I know your going through a lot......I hope I didn't trigger you.

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous You didn't trigger me

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

Can you explain in some more detail (does not have to be exact) as to what happened

artsygirl

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

Please call your doctor or therapist immediately and tell them exactly what you said in your first paragraph. It’s ok to say you need help now.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Anthony?...I think I talked to you before....its the same thing from before I talked to you like a week ago......my dad was mad at me and talking mean to me on the phone. I had a rage thought when the cat was on my lap and pushed up. Then the cat jumped off....

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

We've talked before, and I don't want the OCD to bully you. I've dealt with things that I still regret doing that I think/thought were sins. However, if it's still on my mind, chances are they're not. Try doing some ERP. Feel uncomfortable

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@anthonys I am not even versed in ERP.....sorry if I sound self engrossed.....I was on some supplements I shouldn't have been on......I thought I needed the supplements to fight Covid but it was making my OCD worse.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@anthonys You have given me the most hope but I just can't believe this.....I want to talk more but I sense your done with the subject and there is a possibility I could be upsetting you and your OCD......I was hoping by now that God would give me "peace beyond understanding"....

anthonys

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous Maybe you need to pray and say to God something like"God, I am stressed about this issue. I'm not sure whether I did something wrong or not. Please give me wisdom on whether or not I did something wrong. If I did nothing wrong, help me to accept that and move on. If I did something wrong, help me to accept Your forgiveness. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

@anthonys Thanks....sorry if I am stressing you out...I am a mess.....I am mad too becsuse cats are very sensitive and she plays with me a little different.....either that or I am reading into something I shouldn't be.......I am a bit schizophrenic or bi-polar or something as well......I am just really sick.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

But the thing I checked a few times...I even keep a coat and a flannel shirt between me and the cat....I checked a few times to make sure I didn't feel anything but the last time I checked I (pushed up) I think it caught something in the cats groin.....the cat coughed and looked scared and it makes me feel like I did something....I don't know if this is serious or stupid/petty but I am having a hard time getting over it....I didn't mean to purposely hit something on the cat... I didn't even think the cat could feel anything with a coat between me and it.

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Sorry Anthony that I keep talking about this......I went on a drive today and was just yelling at God......I am sick........I got really messed up with OCD a while ago....I fought for years to get better but this last year I fell apart.

jsford04

Date posted: 22w

so overwhelmingly sad and need someone to talk to

My OCD has become so bad and I feel so alone. I have religious OCD (Christianity) and I’ve been doing okay with letting the blasphemous thoughts go in the moment, but I’m so overcome with guilt and shame I can barely function. I can feel okay and hopeful for a few minutes and then I’m reminded of the horrible thoughts and how nothing can take them back and I can’t handle the guilt. I’m becoming a burden to my family and feel so alone. I do not know what to do. Please help.

Anonymous

Date posted: 11w

Questions for my Christian ocd sufferers

I put a trigger warning because I will be discussing themes of end of times. I feel like I'm not following God's will. God knows ultimately that things were going to speed up end of times wise. A few months ago, I had a random thought to call someone I had affected with past sin and apologize to him although I did not know he was there, my sin affected him. I know he deserves an apology, but I chalked it up to ocd and treated it as such for months fast forward to now I feel like I'm completely against God. Horrifying. It's a complex situation I caused and therefore though I know he deserves an apology I'm really scared as I created a mess of things. I've been praying that God help certain things come to fruition so I could be exposed and help minister to others if that's what He's calling me to do but no answer. Instead horrible images and thoughts and feelings of doom. I see signs to apologize everywhere. I'm at my wits end. Because I tend to get ahead of myself I asked two family members and they said don't and then I see things that say Though people in your life mean well, don't go based on what they say only what God says. I tell God to do His will and I'll follow, do you think He'll listen. I even told Him I straight up don't want to do it, not because He doesn't deserve one, but because last time I apologized to someone else I didn't do it right and it was messy. I feel so evil, like a wolf in sheep's clothing. I also remember looking up morbid things for what???? Only to be disturbed pray about it and leave by why search it up again? I also fantasized alot about guys I've been single forever, late 20s now, I'm trying to go to church and my crush is there and I try to stop thinking about him because I know it's delusional but the thoughts don't leave. I'm so tired I want to stop but stop what? Living? I want to stick to God as close as possible. I'm going crazy.

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