need help or tips? i've been spiraling because i have confession compulsion and i have this fear that once my boyfriend finds out the themes of my OCD, he'll leave me. he loves me and tells me he'll always be by my side but before i kind of confessed that my mind kind of has his followers memorized because of compulsions i've performed before and he admitted that it slightly turned him off because "damn that's something else" but it wasn't a dealbreaker... can't help but think if he thinks that's something else then he is definitely gonna be turned off after he finds out about my POCD especially now it kind of involved his younger nephew or about Harm OCD or Pure O Really need help to overcome this. I have this urge to confess to him and try to make him understand to get that reassurance from him that even after knowing these he won't leave me but I also don't want to bc not a lot of people will understand or be comfortable about it esp we've only been together for a few months

long distanc...

Date posted: 4y

Explaining OCD to loved ones is tough. I also have a confession habit, but my friends, parents, my wife all stuck by me. Hell my wife said “yes” knowing I have ocd :) Use best judgement when explaining what you’re going through. If you think it’s too soon then go with your gut. Just remember the thoughts are all intrusive bullshit shit! *also is your handle a paramore reference? Love that song!

rosecoloredgirl

Date posted: 4y

My boyfriend knows I have OCD but I don't know if he knows how bad and fucked up it can get (from Harm OCD, to POCD) so far there's this stigma with OCD that it's just wanting things to be organized and having little ticks. When I explain things I have this habit (OCD related) that it needs to be detailed as possible or else it'll feel like i'm leaving things out and it could be a sign of me being a dishonest partner. It's most probably too soon in our relationship as we've only been together for months. As I said I don't think he knows how bad it can get but I'm hoping he understands that it's my sickness that makes me think of fucked up stuff like that especially that he's a nurse so maybe he has more of a scientific grasp on it. When I do explain OCD to him do you think I should go into detail? and yes! it's a paramore reference. after laughter really is the album of my life :) glad to see a fan here too

long distanc...

Date posted: 4y

I think you’re being hard on yourself. Most if not all people get intrusive thoughts, we just have a condition that runs it like a broken record. You’re not being dishonest in my opinion. You’re choosing how much of a private health matter you’re ready to share. It can be hard for others to understand. I’ve told a lot of close friends I have ocd, but have only gone into specifics with people I felt I could trust. I’ve also had really positive experiences where people have empathized and been like “oh I get weird thoughts too”. My wife was like oh yeah I’ve had weird sex dreams that I wanted nothing to do with. A friend told me of intrusive harm thoughts he’s had. They can just let them go, ours get stuck in a loop. We got shitty luck in that regard, but it’s treatable!! Use best judgement. Sharing can be a compulsion, so be careful there. You’ve told him you have ocd, I think that’s plenty open and honest! After Laughters incredible, and a great mental health record!!

rosecoloredgirl

Date posted: 4y

Thank you so much. One last thing, sometimes I find it hard to believe that he can actually love me without the knowledge of my OCD themes too. Like will he still love me if he knew? all that. It's really hard especially he's probably the first official relationship I've had and I've never felt this way about anyone before. I'm sure he'll understand intrusive thoughts, just not sure if he's accepting if it involves his family already. Trying not to confess since I highly feel it's a compulsion as well and i'm supposed to help myself. And yes! After Laughter's a great album, I'm an artist and it highly inspired my art 😊

whatadooo

Date posted: 4y

I wouldn't confess. Speak to a therapist.

rosecoloredgirl

Date posted: 4y

Will do. Thank you so much.

long distanc...

Date posted: 4y

@rosecoloredgirl I agree, ocd attacks what we care about. The themes aren’t your fault. Confessing would give them to much power, and might damage your relationship. Talking to a therapist about them is definitely the right move.

thepapaofsimon

Date posted: 4y

@long distance runner “OCD attacks what we care about” write this on my headstone plz

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

what ended up happening? did you tell him? I’m in the same spot

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