My biggest HOCD fear Isn’t even about being gay anymore it’s about hurting others and being known as a liar or that I deceived her and every other girl I dated. I don’t even give myself the freedom to be gay if I felt like being gay hahah it’s completely dependent on how others will feel and see me and the shame and the yatta yatta...GUYS OR GIRLS WHO ARE GOING THROUGH HOCD...I’ve dug myself too big of a whole to the point where my sexuality might actually be something else hahaha but the feeling and thoughts of HOCD still keeps me up at night and attack me in the morning - ALL RELATED TO GUILT AND SHAME AND BEING GAY IN THE FUTURE WITH MY BEST MALE FRIEND AND LIFE COMING TO AN END....but I’m getting through it somehow! If you want to laugh let’s talk about our stories. There was once a time where I got 35 erections in one day all for guys including around every male family member in my family and male friend in my class. The girls that I hooked up with frequently and had sex with all the time came to me years later and I couldn’t get it up and they were all so confused.

No I think your really worried

Keep this in mind Ocd makes you hooked on reassurance Ocd is weird whatever you fear whatever you don’t like it’ll make it seem possible so you are uncomfortable sometimes you just don’t have to give a fuck and remember it’s just Ocd

Gotcha. I guess I need to calm down. It's true that I try to check. I mean I went from not being able to take girls out of my mind to this... So sad. I'll try to find ways to calm myself down.

Just want to add - I got these erections at age 18 when I never ever had an erection or feeling of attraction to any male or male in porn or even the sweaty muscular guys I used to do Jiujitsu with which you roll between a guys ball sake and literally dry hump them in a wierd fighting sense.... never did any real gay feelings come to mind when ALL THE OPPRTUNITY WAS THERE ;) ;) (to touch and feel and rub my body against guys) hahaha

Do you still have hocd

There are a few guys in here who have physically experimented with the same sex when they were young, yet they lived their life straight and didn't think twice about what they did until HOCD hit them. I never did that bc I didn't want to, but I was curious. I was bullied and called gay when I wasn't. I had liked girls ever since I can remember. I remember seeing I topless woman at the beach at the age of 8 and had my first massive erection in public. I couldn't stop looking at them. Heck, I even had my first experience with a girl when I was 10, nothing special (kissing, touching) but it was amazing for me at the time I was like "a girl likes me! This is amazing!". Anyway, long story short, I couldn't even get a date with this girl I liked at the time and was getting a lot of intrusive thoughts as a result of the bullying and started to wonder what it would be like. This whole situation messed me up. Kids can be really mean

I just woke up and the first thought after waking up was about a guy and I got an erection I mean for the past 3 days I was ocd free and today it just came back not sure if my erection is just a groinal response or am I actually gay

Iam no profesional maybe your confusing the two things Iam 50 thank god I wake up with an erection still but remember what Ocd is the opposite of what you want

I've stopped waking up with morning erections since a couple of years now. I rarely wake up with one and I'm in my late 20s. My sex drive is also gone. Do you think that's abnormal? I guess I should go to my GP

@deputydean wow I feel the same man. Really. Just shows how HOCD is actually not bs

It is bs either your gay or not if it bothers you says a lot Ocd can take shape in many forms that’s just one of them Iam not trying to simplify it but it’s all a bunch of garbage