- Username
- BubbaBoo12
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I am going through this exact thing right now and it has put me in one of the toughest periods of severe depression that I have gone through in quite some time. The hardest part is that I know my OCD does this to me, but then I question if it’s actually my OCD this time... like what if I’m so used to my OCD “crying wolf” that there is an actual wolf this time and I’m consciously trying to ignore it. I keep feeling that my relationship is toxic and I need to get out, but then I think it’s probably just my OCD... but like what if it isn’t and I’m actually in a toxic relationship..? My reassurance seeking has lead me to consider finding someone of the opposite sex who’s my age and having them evaluate my relationship to tell me if it’s actually toxic or if it’s just my OCD, but I’m fairly certain that would only feed it and make things worse.
I question if my relationship is toxic too! It’s truly scary! Relationship doubt is awful!
I am and its driving me nuts....my husband and I have been married almost 8 years but been together 17 years. This has been the hardest OCD subtype ive ever gone through. Everyday is a struggle, I keep trying to make things better but in his eyes there was not a need to discuss certain things in our relationship that I'm perceiving are an issue for him but they are not. I now worry everyday when I look at him that he is sad and anxious but won't tell me whats on his mind. I don't know how I got to the place I'm in now but it feels like hell. We were the perfect couple and I loved (still love) Joe unconditionally never dreaming I would have a fucked up thought one day that would give me so much fear and panic in one day to totally change my life. Its hard because in all this I'm trying to get him to understand my OCD but could never tell him about the ROCD for fear he wouldn't understand and it would just make things worse. Im literally sad all the time. I could also use some advise.
I wish I could give you advice but I am in the same boat! Hang in there <3
OCD makes you feel like you have to solve or do something IMMEDIATELY or RIGHT NOW. It makes your “fight, flight or freeze” act up. ROCD is a hard subtype because you value your relationship with others and it makes you question what you value. I’m sorry you’re going through this right now :( <3 it is scary sometimes, best of luck
Thank you so much! I am doing a little better! I just have to remember it’s a thought and ocd targets what you love and care for the most
@BubbaBoo12 It absolutely does target what you care about the most. You have to think of it as your evil twin sometimes because it knows everything about you, so it tries to misconstrue everything and make you doubt yourself and search for that certainty . Glad you’re doing better (:
I genuinely concerned. I have relationship ocd and see all these posts more so of partner focused, it being attracted to other people. I don’t have this at all. All my ocd is relationship focused and I’m starting to think it’s not ocd anymore!! Every single second I feel like I want to or should break up with him. I don’t feel that spark or infatuation and haven’t since the beginning. What if we just aren’t a good match? Even though he thinks we are. He’s my first healthy relationship. I feel sick. I feel like I’m prolonging the breakup because I just don’t wanna be alone or hurt him 😢
I’ve been going through extreme distress because of my urges and intrusive thoughts that surround my boyfriend. He’s amazing and I love him so much but i have such a strong urge to breakup with him. This urge gets to the point that I have had multiple panic attacks where I am crying, shaking and throwing up. I have talked to him about it but I dont want to keep hurting him. I really want these thoughts to stop, so I can continue normally with my boyfriend and feel connected again. Any ideas?
hi so i am pretty new to discovering ocd and trying to figure out why i am feeling the way i am feeling. i’ve never been diagnosed with ocd and honestly thought my anxiety was just super bad until it started affecting the way i saw my relationship. i’ve never had this bad of anxiety in my relationship and around november of last year is whenever i started noticing the cycle of repeated thoughts of “should i break up with him?” ive been with my boyfriend for almost two years. yes we’ve been through our ups and downs and our relationship has overall been such a beautiful relationship (super healthy compared to old ones) we love each other deeply and communicate and just overall find ways to help improve our relationship healthier and i’ve had a doubt here and there throughout these years but since last November i started feeling disconnected with him a little. i started to question sometimes if i really loved him. other times i told myself and asked myself if i should break up with him. if we really loved each other. i started focusing on his features a lot more. to the point where these thoughts around him made me feel so extremely uncomfortable. i’ve done all my research trying to figure out if I love him or not and trying to find reassurance and other people stories to see if they feel the same way I would also see how I feel whenever I was around him and it got to a point where I overall just felt very disconnected with him and a lot of different forms. I sometimes will forget about these thoughts and I will go out through my week throughout my days and I won’t even think about them and then something good will happen actually and it will trigger that immediate thought or sometimes we’re not even doing anything we’re just hanging out and being together and that will trigger the thought of wanting to break up with him and it makes me extremely uncomfortable and it makes me panic gives me anxiety and it just stresses me out because I know it’s not true, but my brain has tried to fully convince myself it is. I was doing really good and I figured out how healthy I wanted this relationship to be recently and because we’ve been so stressed on talking about our relationship and moving on even further and growing together, it started coming back and now I’m very very anxious again. I also have this type of anxiety of obsessing over things such as my health. When it comes to my gut health to my skin I have a very bad habit of having perfectionism not only within, my body face and everything around what is myself. I have a lot of anxieties, and I always thought it was just very severe anxiety until when I was researching why I was doubting my love for my boyfriend I heard of ROCD and I was super curious to know if I even have OCD, I brought it up with my psychiatrist and she doesn’t think that I have any. I have so much anxiety over this I feel like it’s physically and mentally controlling my body from how much it’s overwhelming me. I don’t know what to do. I keep convincing myself it’s not even RCOD and maybe I truly don’t love him but I have no other proof or feelings that that could be true. It’s just a thought that circles in my head and no matter how many reassurance I give myself it will come back within an hour, if someone could please give some advice I will have my own therapy session here soon and I’m very excited to know how I can overcome this
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond