I can not live with all of this episodes I had eve since ocd attached to my religion I feel like just feeling that I committed the unpardonable sin makes me feel sometimes that I shouldn’t be alive or that should of had die when all of this started happening there is days when I have hope but there is others where I feel like this😔

I don’t know if I have sin? There is been episodes where I’m falling or waking up and I hear my self say things but I don’t really remember if I did or it’s my mind also when though thoughts get really intense I feel like Maight have day something aloud😔

What was your sin? We are all sinners n fall short of the glory of god

Hi friend, I don’t know what your spiritual relationship is, but I follow Jesus. And from what I picked up in comments, it seems like that may be yours too? I really want to encourage you right now that the enemy comes as a ‘disguised angel of light’ (1 Corinthians 11:14). I’ve had several times where I would think to myself, “oh my gosh, was I disobedient? I dont think I was wrong, I don’t think I messed up, I really sought the Lord on it. I know He would have clearly told me. He made a way, so I’m surely not disobedient. Why am I thinking that then? Would the enemy use disobedience against me as an attack? I’m not sure because this this and this...” And then I realized, through a good friend of mine, that the enemy does come as a false angel of light. He used scripture against Jesus. Then the Lord led me to look at the fruit of those thoughts that I was meditating on, so for example I would think, “Okay, when I really sit and marinate on these thoughts, what kind of actions is it producing? It’s causing me to feel incredibly distanced from my closest relationships, it’s causing me to be terrified of the Word because I feel like it’s God giving me these thoughts, and that really sucks because that’s the only hope I have to get me out of here. It’s causing me to be distanced in every way.... okay, would God say those things to me? Would the fruit of that to draw me near or draw me away? Jesus speaks and draws us near. The enemy is a accuser (Rev. 12:10) so he accuses us. Whether that be with biblical issues or not. I’ve noticed in my life, that whenever I hold something of great value in my life - whether that be my love for God, my husband or my family - the enemy knows that, and he wants to detour and devour that, how does it he that? By planting questions and doubts against it - even finding scripture at times to accuse me to get me to think it is ‘right’. But he did that with Jesus. He took scripture out of context and used it against him. Partial Truth. FEAR, False Evidence Appearing Real. So I just really want to encouraging as a believer that sees you from the outside of your thoughts, but fully understand the inside of them and the emotions of them - these are lies. Daily I’ve been speaking over myself - ether it be once or twice a day - I’ll just say, “You are God and I am not.” And sometimes I don’t fully understand what I’m saying, but I just practically do it - and I’ve been saying clarity come slowly in places where there is confusion and foggy ness. I hope this helps you