Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi200Hi200
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s important to note that a lot of people who are straight or sure of their sexuality don’t have a response like feeling disgusted or scared or anxious about being with the members of the opposite of their sexual orientation. They just know that’s not what they like and don’t prefer doing thing with that sex. It’s not a thought they spend a more than a couple of seconds on.
Hopeful8Hopeful8
- Date posted
- 4y
Very good advice!
Hi200Hi200
- Date posted
- 4y
@Hopeful8 Thanks!!
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
thank you infinitely!! such great advice lol you're right stuff has been going on pretty well for the past 4 days so i guess that's why everything suddenly changed and i started worrying about the lack of anxiety
coccoroccococcorocco
- Date posted
- 4y
Trying to get a definite answer to whether it’s OCD or denial is a compulsion. I know it’s hard, but trying to figure out the answer will only make your ocd worse. Even if you get reassurance, the relief will be only temporary. The only way out of the cycle is to tell yourself maybe it’s hocd or maybe it’s denial and sit with the discomfort and uncertainty. Eventually the anxiety will subside. It’s very difficult but it gets easier the more you practice. You have to train your brain that this obsessive question doesn’t need a definite answer.
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
i know this is the best advice you could give but i feel really down like i thought i was doing better
Hopeful8Hopeful8
- Date posted
- 4y
When the ocd isn't acting up, who are you genuinely most attracted to?
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
men i've always wanted to be with men and never imagined myself with a woman i do find some women pretty attractive but not anything more then my mind goes like "imagine sleeping with her do you like it??" or "what if you like kissing her imagine kissing her what's your reaction" always had crushes on men though
Hopeful8Hopeful8
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nour04 You're obviously a girl right ? I mean, I have pretty bad ocd and for a while I was dating a girl. I am a female myselfx I tried so hard to figure out if I was gay or not, Now I'm married to my husband. Looking back it didn't matter. It was a phase and fun while it lasted. I still sometimes fantasize about being intimate with a woman. Because it's a turn on for me. Maybe this is ocd. Maybe it's that I'm bi . Maybe you are bi curious or bi sexual. Try not to focus on it too much. If you want to try it our with a woman, do it!
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
@Hopeful8 i don't want to and that's exactly the theme of my ocd at first the thoughts were so disgusting and disturbing but now they're not so disturbing anymore and it alarms me more because i thought i was doing better i don't want to try anything with a woman and given the chance i wouldn't either i'm just so worried my thoughts are true
Hopeful8Hopeful8
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nour04 Then the reason they're probably so intense is because you don't want it!
MelodyocdMelodyocd
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi! I get the exact same worries as you, I’m also a woman who fears they’re gay/ bi, I’m so sorry you’re going through this it’s really scary, I’m personally really struggling right now too. I saw you said that you get scared because the thoughts don’t disturb you anymore, I also experience this which then gives me anxiety about not having anxiety, I think this is called a back door spike? Naturally when we’ve had certain themes for so long the reparative thoughts/ images won’t be as anxiety inducing because you’ve thought about them so much (kinda what erp is!), but we still have these theme because we worry about the theme, but just the disgust/ fear isn’t there as much anymore because you’ve been thinking about it so much!
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
thank you for your reply the thing that is bothering me more is that sometimes i get groinal responses and it feels like i actually like and want the thoughts someone had recommended a youtube video about this ans yes ocd can make you feel like you want the thoughts it's just not enough at this point i an sorry you're going through this too it's really dreadful you have my full support!!
Nour04Nour04
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nour04 plus now my worry is that it's never been hocd and has always been denial since i had been doing good for about 4 days but today isn't that better
MelodyocdMelodyocd
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nour04 You have mine too! Yeah groinal responses are a nightmare, I used to get them a lot too, I think what stopped me from getting them as much was trying not to care about them anymore, I just saw them for what they were, my body reacting to something, I accepted it didn’t necessarily mean I was aroused, but more I was just thinking “what if I get aroused” which then led to me focusing on down there which then caused a sensation. I’m from the uk and we’ve been in lockdown for a while, restrictions are easing now so going out had become terrifying for me. I’m constantly checking when I’m out if I’m attracted to woman, or if I’m attracted to men enough, it’s horrible :(
MelodyocdMelodyocd
- Date posted
- 4y
@Nour04 We get ups and downs, I was better from this for like 4 years and it all came back recently. A good day is a good day, don’t let the bad ones over shadow it
Hi200Hi200
- Date posted
- 4y
OCD is what causes you to ruminate on this thought which normally, you wouldn’t have spent more than a few seconds thinking about.
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issphra 🫶🏻
- Date posted
- 23w
Help, Meta OCD/POCD?
I’ve been feeling the urge to avoid intimacy or purposefully engage (for reassurance that I won’t give into a compulsion) because of intrusive thoughts and fear that I’ll “check/test” my reactions. My OCD is making me so scared that I’ll purposefully think of a child and try to see if I like it. It’s so complicated but I guess I’m mentally checking if I would mentally check during intimacy. I’ve even envisioned myself checking and it’s making me so nauseous. I know it’s a compulsion like any other but the sound of “touching yourself to the thought of a child” sounds atrocious and vile. I’m terrified I’ll automatically start checking next time I am being intimate. I truly feel so worried. If anyone has gone through something similar, I’d appreciate hearing your experience. Or if anyone has any advice?
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Mt2019
- Date posted
- 19w
Question about HOCD
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
geodrimilis
- Date posted
- 15w
Hocd vs actually gay (my opinion)
So I’ve talked to a couple of gay people and they all told me the same thing. They ALWAYS knew they liked guys and they have ever gotten aroused by a woman in their life. In fact they told me that they always found a woman’s body disgusting. Looking back in my life I’ve been attracted to girls for as long as I can remember even before puberty. All my fantasies were about girls and I can’t remember a time where I felt the same for a guy (because it never happened). At the end I can still get aroused by women and you can clearly see how much stupid this obsession about being gay is. Gay people can’t get instinctively aroused by a woman and like it. Groinal responses and sensations don’t mean anything because they simply do not bring joy or a feeling of desire. Instead they bring panic. I once got a groinal when “testing my reactions” and I was sitting there crying like my life is over. That’s not how genuine attraction works and no one has woken up one day feeling different and no one has been secretly gay and never noticed it and spent his whole life into women instead.
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