My religious OCD is freaking out again. Over a lot of things but this time one of the main ones is the awful things that have been done under the guise of Christianity and how some people then see all Christians as toxic and evil by default. I know I can't do anything about those people's beliefs but my brain won't shut up and won't stop going in this spiral either.

I think one thing to recognize is nuance right. Yes, Christianity has been used to justify very evil things like slavery, colonization, imperialism, etc etc. But people can use anything to justify their actions - it’s human nature to try to justify an act that seems morally/ethically wrong with religion so one feels less cognitive disbalance. However, that doesn’t make Christianity bad. Are there bad Christians? Absolutely, just like there are bad Jews, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, etc. Christianity is a region that attempts to instruct people how to live, what to believe in, how to worship, treat, others, etc. As all religion, it has its positives and negatives, but that doesn’t make Christianity toxic in and of itself. Anyone can believe anything, and if they believe Christianity is toxic, it is their belief. That doesn’t make that belief right, correct? Maybe also recognizing that Christianity is also a very personal belief system. We all practice differently, or not at all, and if you’re being a good person/not harming others, you can practice Christianity any way you want. Almost Every region has been used by people to justify something evil, but that doesn’t make the religion evil. For example, terrorists in the name of Islam use jihad to describe their evil actions murdering innocent people across the planet. For ordinary Muslims, jihad signifies a moral, righteous struggle to improve their lives and brethren. Religion is complicated and nuanced, and it’s a very personal matter for people. Be kind to yourself and don’t let it affect your views of Christianity. Yes, it has been distorted to justify evil, but that doesn’t make it inherently toxic by any means.

Hi I'm sorry you're feeling like that, what is it exactly that troubles you? Christianity has been wrongfully used to justify bad things, and yes people have a distorted view of Christianity, but that's their ignorance, just as there's racist there's people that don't know what Christianity is about and what it really teaches. I invite you to explore your faith and do research on good things brought forth by Christianity, did you know that the first proposer of the big bang theory was a Catholic priest? God bless you, don't be afraid.