- Username
- Stacey08
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Congrats on the 7 month streak!!! OCD heightens your worst fears, so the fact that it’s telling you “what if you don’t love you’re boyfriend? what if you love this other person?” shows just how much you actually love your boyfriend and don’t want to lose him.
I have been undertaking “ERP” treatment with my therapist. He would tell me to picture actually falling in love with someone else. In order to beat OCD we need to expose ourselves to the worst fear we have. For instance. I have driving OCD. When I drive past someone I think Iv Hit someone. Then I need to check. Now by using ERP I can drive past people most times and not get “triggered” ?? he would get me to accept that I may have hit someone and go as far as to imagine that I did. Our anxiety will spike. But eventually our body will get used to it and “habituate”. You know deep down that you and your boyfriend are in a loving relationship. But by asking for reassurance, checking and ruminating you are just making the cycle and doubt stronger. Understand? ?
I think it’s really cool you told him - it shows how much you trust him - and I’m sure he recognizes that. Also, relationships are about being there for the other person in the good and the bad.
I use to always talk to my fiancé when I had those thoughts.. then my counselor recommended not to. I write them out instead. I do know it’s torturous... however, our OCD targets what we love. Mine went from me thinking I didn’t love him to what if I wanted one of his friends or brother, or loved them. Have you experienced that at all? I would try and give my fiancé more affection and just keep fighting the OCD when I felt like I didn’t love him.
Sometimes is better to keep some thoughts to yourself if you already know it's a disease.And sometimes our loved ones don't understand it at first time or the way it really feels for us.Be cool and focus in the future ??
He should understand OCD better rather than being petty and jealous
I am sooooo sorry
Hello guys, Im new here and seeking for advice. Im in a relationship with an amazing guy. I love him so much and that’s why my ocd and anxiety are latching onto my connection with him. He was staying over at my place and 2 events happened (something to do with his disease and he had an allergic reaction to food) that caused my stress and anxiety levels to be higher than normal. Followed by a night of bad sleep made things worse. I became very alert and was easily triggered. Something occurred that I completely miscalculated and we talked about it but my anxiety was through the roof at this point. I got these disturbing images of me hurting him in my head. I have had intrusive thoughts in the past but it didn’t affect me this much. Because of the lack of sleep and my high anxiety level made me so afraid of myself that I made the decision to sent him home. I have cried so much since that happened. I feel so bad for having that thought. I love him so much. Our communication is very healthy so I’ve told him about this the day after (why I sent him home). I couldnt do it in the moment because i didnt want to make the situation worse. We werent in a fight when i sent him home but both emotional and hugging each other. I have the feeling that my anxiety and ocd have won the battle by sending him home (avoidance). But i care so much for him that I didn’t want him to be at risk (thats what my mind tells me, i know its showing me disturbing images the opposite of what i want). Im in the early stage of having this type of OCD but I don’t want to lose him. But for me the only way to get this relationship to work is to get rid of this. Can anyone relate? Like, having intrusive thoughts about your partner? I know its latching on to the things you love the most and I hate it so much. Thanks in advance :)
so back in july i made a mistake of going behind my partner’s back and hanging out with an old guy friend (who i had a romantic past with) and while i was hanging out with him i had a great time but man my thoughts were going crazy. i found him attractive, funny, etc. i’ve known him for years and everytime we would talk i felt there was some type of tension. like romantic or something. well i felt it again when we hung out and immediately regretted it because i know i love my boyfriend a lot and i felt like a horrible person for doing something like that. i couldn’t hide it from him any longer than i did (not even 3 days) so i told him and he got really upset. at the time i didn’t know what i want, either my boyfriend or that friend. i decided to stay with my boyfriend and ever since i’ve been getting crazy intrusive thoughts about my old friend (i blocked him so i don’t have contact with him). a few months later (now) i know that i want and love my boyfriend, i don’t want to be with anyone else. but i’ve been getting so many intrusive thoughts about that guy and seeing certain posts just remind me of him even when i don’t want them to. then my brain starts to spiral - ‘what if you actually want to be with him instead and you’re just in denial right now’ or something like ‘you dont love your boyfriend, if you did you wouldnt be having these thoughts’ and i’m just so..drained. i’m so tired of thinking about this guy, i seriously don’t want to think about him. i just want to be happy with my boyfriend. i keep telling myself i know what i want, because i do. i want to be with my bf and i want to be happy with him…i love him so much. but my brain just tries to tell me otherwise. i know i messed up and i’m paying the price for it. maybe i do deserve this. i just wish i could erase everything, my past, etc. and just move on. my boyfriend doesn’t hold what i did against me but he’s well aware of what happened and i know how it made him feel. i would do anything to take it back because he doesn’t deserve that, he never did. and i seriously want to be better for him. but these constant thoughts i get are always getting in the way and almost making me feel hopeless. i haven’t told my bf about these thoughts because i’m worried he would take it the wrong way. i really don’t think i should tell him because i know for a fact it would send us both down a spiral and i don’t want that. but, ocd will always try to get what it wants. anyone else going through something similar? some common humanity would probably ease my mind a bit. (in a non-compulsive way. or maybe this is a compulsion. idk.)
I’ve been going through extreme distress because of my urges and intrusive thoughts that surround my boyfriend. He’s amazing and I love him so much but i have such a strong urge to breakup with him. This urge gets to the point that I have had multiple panic attacks where I am crying, shaking and throwing up. I have talked to him about it but I dont want to keep hurting him. I really want these thoughts to stop, so I can continue normally with my boyfriend and feel connected again. Any ideas?
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond