Been dealing with an old obsession recently. False memory ocd about cheating on my boyfriend while I was out drinking with my two girlfriends about a year ago… can anyone relate to this? Even though I remember the night and eating food and getting picked up by my boyfriend I’m worried I can’t remember when I went to the bathroom alone and what if someone came in with me .. I obsess over the fact that “I can’t know for sure since I was drunk” and it tortures me when the obsession comes back. I really didn’t think anything of the entire night until I got home because I was telling my boyfriend about how the bartenders were being flirty with me. Then I had this thought about what if I let it go further? I was with all my friends all night except when I went to the bathroom and that’s what the obsession targets. I’ve discussed this many times with my boyfriend.. he didn’t even think much of it and thinks it’s my ocd. Obviously reassurance SUCKS and doesn’t work which I’ve learned. Because every time he says it’s my ocd my brain is like “great he thinks you’re innocent when you’re not” … I’ve recognized all these things as hallmarks for OCD but when it comes back to haunt you it can feel so real again. Since this is not the first time I’ve had to fight through this obsession here’s some things I have learned. I learned that OCD attacks what is closest to our hearts. In this case my boyfriend who is my absolute best friend and soulmate. I’ve realized when you try so HARD to remember something that you don’t remember your mind will fill it in with a false answer just to have an answer. Since the certainty is what the ocd needs. It thinks a false answer is better than no answer at all. Aka the creation of the false memory. Also I’ve learned that of course we don’t remember daily normal things that we do. Like brushing our teeth or going to the bathroom. I remembered the flirty gestures when they happened because they stood out so wouldn’t I remember if I made out or had sex with a stranger or if someone came in the bathroom? I’m not asking this with the intention of getting answers it’s just to show how we have common sense and know ourselves but ocd will still make you question that. It’s not fair and we shouldn’t let it take the trust we have in ourselves. If you have a similar experience PLEASE reply or comment

Without trying to seek reassurance, I’m wondering if anyone has insight on identifying an intrusive thought vs reality. Something that’s always really helped ground me in moments of false memory ocd is clearly remembering the exact moment the thought arose and how it started as “what if I cheated and don’t remember.” Then the images come and are extremely distressing, but I’ve always found some comfort in coming back to that moment of “this started as what if.” It feels like my brain is almost getting more creative with the thoughts now, and I’ve been having probably the worst anxiety of my life the past couple months after another intrusive thought entered my mind. I woke up after a night drinking and thought to myself “did you kiss your friend and don’t remember?” (Didn’t happen, undeniably proved). The rest of the day I stayed anxious about other things I could have done and poured over all my memories of the night. Then the next day I finally had found some peace based on all the evidence from my friends who were with me that nothing bad happened. I then thought “what about when you went to the bathroom,” which I hadn’t really been thinking about before, and then my mind immediately started flashing with images of me performing sex acts in the bathroom with some person who has no name, face, details, or anything I remember about interacting with them. I think I’m just concerned that this was a moment of genuine memory recall since I hadn’t been thinking about the bathroom before, and it was more of a sudden flash of images and “did you do that” vs “what if you did that.” I’m wondering how others are able to identify that something is an intrusive thought vs reality.

I’m a good man and I know that. My OCD revolves around relationships. While dating someone a truly enjoy, I find myself needing to compulse everything on my mind or else I feel like I’m being a liar or keeping secrets. I also am pretty confident I suffer from false memory ocd. I don’t like to put a label on things but I’m 99.9% sure I do. My compulsions a lot of times come from things I’m not even sure are real. The more thought I put into them, the more I start to believe they are real. One of the worst compulsions I had in my relationship was I had a thought “what if I find my ex more attractive” and “what if I thought the sex with them was better”. I ended up compulsing these things to my gf. After lots of time to think and get a ahold of myself I was able to remind myself that these things weren’t true and I was just in a downward spiral. There was a 2-3 month period where every time I was relieved of something then I would instantly think of something else. These compulsions have caused insecurity in my gf and I feel like a terrible person. Never meant to hurt her at all and was just trying to find a sense of relief. While I know it is not true, I can’t fix things with words and I feel terrible. I would love to hear from people with tricks and strategies that can help. I love my gf and want to fix things and understand this is not a relationship fixer app but I would like to know what are some ways you are able to deal with these kind of things.

Hello everyone I need some advice. I’ve struggled with what I think and hope is ocd for a long time. It started when I was 14 I had a concussion and my brain convinced myself for 9 months that I had this concussion. Then I had a gf at 15 before we were official I did a terrible thing im regretful of it for sure. I kissed another girl. I told my now ex girlfriend about it and I started to overthink the situation and think maybe I slept with the girl or maybe we did more than kiss. In reality we didn’t. when I turned 16 I started having thoughts of maybe I cheated on her with other girls at our school. It would be false memories of me sleeping or doing things with 4 or 5 other girls. That eventually went away as I would ask reassurance like a crazy person. Then one day what I believe was either Christmas time or new years around that time I had this thought “what if I SA’d my ex little sister?” This thought tormented me for so long I couldn’t believe it. As she was so young it would be impossible for me to do that without someone noticing plus that’s absolutely horrifying and disgusting and I’ve never ever ever ever been alone with her or desired to. Then what I knew would happen came along with me thinking I SA’d my little sister or my baby brother at the time. It was a horrible experience. Then it went to me thinking I was a pedo without the false memories. Then it went to my other siblings thinking I did something to them in their sleep, I did something to the pets, etc. As I got older I realized what ocd was and what I was going through and it eventually all went away. But as time goes on I’m now almost 24 I have spiraled back into thinking I SA my ex little sister. It’s crazy because I’ve never had that desire or anything at all it would absolutely break me if that was true. With something like this saying maybe not maybe it did is crazy because it’s a serious thing. I’m getting therapy on Monday and am just wanting my life back. I just recently got engaged to my beautiful fiancé and I want to be regular again. Anyone have any advice or even have gone through the same scenarios? It’s just so tough.