- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Tonight I sat with my feelings. I remembered a childhood experience that created a fear of absent caregivers. Which now manifest as absent romantic partners. I am currently not doing any kinds of reassurance. Just sitting with the discomfort of being by myself. Lol, I'm doing this activity which makes me feel.connected to people. I will stop now and just sit with my feelings. Good luck to you both just sitting with the root feeling behind these ideas.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
this is what truly haunts me. i know i don’t ever want to hurt any child and these are just obsessive intrusive thoughts that cause uncomfortableness, but of course my brain says the same thing “what if you’re just in denial!!!” and all these scary questions and it makes me feel so horrible inside. it does the same thing with my other themes too. that line scares me, it hunts me. it doesn’t cause me any joy having these intrusive thoughts, they make me scared, so that makes me feel like yes, this is definitely ocd. but then that question of “but what if you just have good morals” comes up and i get anxiety. it’s never ending rumination and torture...
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I hear you hope. I've used the word torture to describe my intrusive thoughts as well. I msged my therapist last night just to check with her that I'm doing the treatment right because I felt the urge to replace the intrusive thoughts with another behaviour to reduce the discomfort I was feeling when I was just sitting with the feeling. I recognised it and I continued to sit with the discomfort. It took a very long time for me to get to sleep. I'm very fortunate ATM that for another reason I'm home off work so I didn't have to worry about not sleeping. It feels like the therapy is working for me. Yes my body is kinda screemimg at me atm. My ears are ringing, my heart rate is up, I'm shallow breathing. I'm getting dehydrated. All string signs of distress. The treatment is to allow the distress. Allow it. The solution to not needing that intrusive thinking is to allow the underlying feeling and all the physical sensations that come with it. I have hope. I have belief that by doing this, by allowing the distress I am reprogramming my brain to me more peaceful. It doesn't need the reassurance. It can handle it. And when nothing goes wrong it will learn to relax and not fear the thing I've been affraid of since I was 8 years old. This feels empowering. Give it a try. Good luck. I wish you all the health you deserve.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Kylena wow thank you for this! you’re truly insightful and i totally agree. not responding to the thoughts and just letting them flow, even if they’re horrible and scream for your attention, it’s more beneficial in the long run than replacing the thought or ruminating and doing compulsions. :) i wish you peace from this disorder, a happier future with no more stress. i also have those symptoms you described as well do to OCD, it’s so hard, i feel your pain. we got this though, we can only get stronger from here. :)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@hope Oh I'm so happy to read this that I've helped you. Blessings for both of us! ❤️🤗
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Me too. I said something the other day rather uncharacteristic of me and I felt awful about it and still do but my brain is making me feel irredeemable and a bad person. The line is ultra thin
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w ago
So I was on a hat chat gpt and it said that people who are non-offenders experience distress and anxiety and disgust and depression and they feel ashamed of being a non-offender like WHAT like that's honestly terrifying and I'm so scared because that's how I've been feeling like when I'm out I get anxiety too especially when I see a younger person I always been attracted to MEN my whole life can people turn into monsters and I don't even care if they have problems if there attracted to kids then there sick in the head like don't care like this has been sharing me soo much and the worst part about it is that they said some are in denial or suppress their attractions I'm so done...... I can not do this this is too much I would rather be gone from this earth than find out that I might be one like you have to be kidding me if you're attracted to young people and desire that you're sick and dead to me you're a monster I don't care like its disgusting. for this eole some people are suffering from POCD like me are scared to think about that and I'm terrified.
- Date posted
- 15w ago
I’m really struggling with something related to me ocd, and I would appreciate kind and supportive advice. If you can’t relate or don’t think anything you have to say would be helpful, I kindly ask pls refrain from commenting this is a really sensitive topic for me. Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern that feels something extremely new and distressing. The first time it happened I remember telling myself before self pleasuring that I am in control no matter what thought comes into my mind because I wanted to prove to myself that these thoughts are just from OCD and I know who I am and an intrusive that came out of no where, and i suddenly felt an intense fear that I was acting on it. In the moment I genuinely felt like I did. And afterword, I panicked and started questioning myself. This SAME FEELING has happened three times in a row each time, the intrusive thought was unwanted and random, and completely against my morals most recently it involved pocd and it feels even worse because it generally felt like I acted on it the thought in the moment while I was self pleasuring the panic doesn’t hit until afterwards when I stop :/ I start thinking that maybe I generally made a mistake and I’m now just realizing that it’s wrong because it generally feels like that :( but when I actually think about it again goes against my morals and values doesn’t make sense it feels incredibly real, and I can’t seem to shake this feeling off that I may have acted on it I’m terrified because I never wanted these thoughts in the first place. And I definitely didn’t choose them. If I had known, I would’ve had these intrusive thoughts I wouldn’t have self pleasured in the first place but it’s extremely hard to convince myself that this may be OCD because I feel like I have no other reason to believe that I didn’t act on it :/
- Date posted
- 12w ago
Trying not to seek reassurance, but rather connect the dots on my OCD and possible reasons as to why I am the way I am. I have severe OCD (or at least I hope I do) mainly surrounding POCD. I've had symptoms of OCD the majority of my life but this theme has come up more recently. When I was a kid, and i'm talking 6-7, I was first exposed to some really gross adult content online. It was introduced to me by a friend of mine around the same age of me. I saw some really disgusting things that a 6-7 year old should definitely not see. This was not a one time occurrence, as I had been exposed to taboo topics online years to come after that, such as the same friend introducing me to Omegle... And i'm sure you can imagine how that went, theres a lot of genuinely disgusting human beings on there. Coming back to the reason for making this post; is it possible to early exposure to this content could be one of the reasons I struggle with POCD? It genuinely scares me to death because you hear that real p*dos dealt with simular situations when they were kids, so thats kind of making me feel that this could be more than OCD, and I could be a genuinely bad person. My POCD feels so real, that at times i'm fully convinced its not OCD. Sometimes I can't even distinguish the feelings of attraction between a younger person and an older person, except for the feeling of anxiety and fear. Its really hard to explain without going into detail, but it just feels so real. Some feedback on this would be great, thank you all.
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