- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Not feeling like you know yourself is extremely common to people who suffer ocd. Also your obsession with ocd is happening to me because the intrusive thoughts are always about stuff that go against your beliefs so you'd always want reassurance that it's ocd, which is also a symptom and a compulsion.
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- 4y
Thank you for your comment back. I have a pretty good understanding of obsessions and compulsions. My big compulsion is internet searching and reassurance thinking because I feel in constant distress.
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- 4y
I’m going through the exact same as you down to everything you have said
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- 4y
I hope you get the peace you want very soon❤
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- 4y
I wish we all get peace mine has went from hocd to pocd
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- 4y
Hello. What are you experiencing? So you have any suggestions to proceed or get through this? I feel so distressed at times.
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- 4y
@Anonymous Well I went through ALOT of themes. First I got hocd, then fear of lying, then pocd, then sexual intrusive thoughts about my family AND riligious figures which is still going on now. If you want to know how to deal with it then you should feel comfortable about having these thoughts (not the content because it really doesn't matter how awful they can get). it's obviously not that easy at all but start by taking a small step.
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- 4y
@Anonymous Also, DO NOT trust your feelings nor your thoughts. Even if you get aroused or even when it's an urge, even when it feels like it's you, it IS ocd tricking you
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- 4y
That’s a really great point. Thank you for sharing your experience. Have you had success with treatment? Or what has worked for you?
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- 4y
I never went to therapy because my parents don't really approve, I just used these points. Actually ocd often just suddenly goes it's really weird. My problem is that whenever I feel comfortable with doing these steps a new theme comes:(
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- 4y
It's also because I'm 14 now and I had alot of OCD types since I was 9/10 so it's somehow familiar to me
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- 4y
Thank you for these insights. It’s like I understand these concepts intellectually, however, I’m fearful that I will lose touch with myself a/o the ability to make choices. Is this part of OCD, too? Does that make sense?
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- 4y
@not_me how do you not engage with the content (however irrelevant). Do you sit with the anxiety and let it pass?
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- 4y
The fear of losing control is also a part of ocd to scare you more. And not engaging with the content mean that you're brain doesn't exactly know the content, just like a computer program. They will give you any idea to stress you out because the brain is adventurous. And if you notice the themes keep changing like from hocd to pocd so if it was actually you why would the theme change? If it was you the thoughts wouldn't even bother you to point where you need reassurance or get terrified that it would be true
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- 4y
Even in some cases not being terrified doesn't mean you actually like the idea
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
I have just recently realized that I had SO OCD. This began whenever I was watching porn and had an intrusive thought about the guy in the porn. It was more minor at first, it was a majority of what I was thinking about throughout the day but it didn’t feel as distressing at first. If I had downtime to think about it, it would affect me but if I was just going about my day I wouldn’t notice it. I began going through the compulsions of checking myself. This lasted for a while until another obsession occurred. Then it seemed as if my SO OCD took a step back. I would have flare ups but they would seem to pass. Recently, I had a very bad night of constant compulsions and looking at pictures and imagining things to check myself. After that night it was very distressing, it affected me to the point where people around me began to notice and ask me if I was okay. One of the big reasons I was so upset was my girlfriend, we have been together for over 3 years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I was thinking “Oh my god, if I am gay I can never be with her.” I would sit and cry about it thinking I would lose her and that might life would change because I was gay. I finally had enough and talked to her and my parents. We did some research and I was so shocked to find out that I had a form of OCD, it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders just knowing that other people have been where I am and that I’m not gay. However, I may have naively expected the compulsions and obsessive thoughts to go away now that I knew I had an actual problem. But I found that the compulsions and thoughts were still there and I was going to put some effort into getting better. I have researched and now know what to do when experiencing intrusive thoughts, yet I still have been performing the compulsions which is just feeding into the OCD. I find myself having intrusive thoughts and then start performing compulsions to see if they are true. What really bothers me is when I have an intrusive thought that tells me that I do like something. But when I think about it I have no desire to pursue those thoughts. However when I feed into the compulsions they just seem to feed into each other. It is like my OCD ignores all the things that I know I like and goes straight to panic mode. I am also trying to do ERP and am going to start doing my best to get better. Does anyone have any tips for not performing the compulsions no matter how anxious you are feeling and no matter how real the intrusive thoughts seem to feel?
- Date posted
- 13w
Hello, I’m new to this app. I’ve always had an anxious brain, and I’ve had coping mechanisms for as long as I can remember. When I was a kid, from as early as I could spell, until I was probably early teens, I would constantly write words in my head along to the beat of music. It’s such a vivid memory because I never stopped doing it. The word had to perfectly match up to the lyric and I loved that it kept my brain busy. I grew out of that, but felt like good context. My anxiety increased drastically around ages 17-19, and I began therapy. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety and panic disorder, due to having a panic attack nearly every day at that time. I overcame that as well, and now the panic attacks are every now and then, but the anxiety is constant, and some recent symptoms have led me to believe I might have some form of OCD. Maybe not. I’m trying to understand myself and get better so I joined this app to make sense of things. Lately I’ve been having really intense intrusive thoughts. I’m really embarassed and they make me feel like a bad person. Thoughts pop in my head seemingly out of nowhere. It will be an image of me harming myself or someone else in a really bad way. (Trigger warning) for example the other day I couldn’t shake the image of me putting a knife through my own forehead, although it’s not something I want to do. Or I’ll imagine someone killing me. I imagine my loved ones dying often. The thoughts feel so out of my control it’s insane. I hate them. Another persistent issue that isn’t as new is replaying social scenarios. I’m a hairstylist so this one is difficult since I meet a bunch of new people every day. I obsess over how I act and if people like me. I will impulsively say things all the time and they will haunt me for weeks. I question even my closest friends and family who show their love. I find myself so angry and numb and like I have so much built up emotion and a busy mind always. While doing my job I spiral really badly if any little thing goes wrong and it’s embarassing. I know there’s more but I can’t think of it now. I just want to feel better and like I’m not constantly battling my mind.
- Date posted
- 12w
Hi! It’s pretty difficult for me to get the courage to post this but I’m really struggling to figure out if what I’m experiencing is OCD or Anxiety or neither. I think I have the “pure O” type of OCD where most of my compulsions take the form of ruminating and trying to figure out something all in my head. When I hear this talked about in forums or online the intrusive thoughts don’t really match mine- I worry often about things that seem more “grounded” if that makes sense. A common one for me is my own identity- i will spend long amounts of time stuck in my head trying to figure out my feelings (often sadness or other real emotions I have and patterns I have) and why I feel that way and what in my life caused that and how it’s impacting other things in my life. I also think often about which parts of my personality are the real me and which aren’t. Sometimes this takes the form of strictly ruminating and sometimes I have fake conversations with people I know. It’s intense and I feel I have to figure it out but with no specific intrusive thought that says something like “you have to figure this out or all of your loved ones will die” but it’s very intense. I think also often of all of the decisions I need to make in the future and how they’re going to affect those I love and care about as well as how much I’ll regret them. I imagine all of the ways I think my actions will emotionally hurt others and how to make the least harmful decision, but to me this feels like a valid concern but go over and over and never come to a conclusion. I often just get scared and never make any move because I don’t see an option that doesn’t hurt someone somehow. But again I’m having a hard time identifying the intrusive thought behind it. But I also don’t choose to think about these things most of the time. This is almost all decisions but especially big life decisions. It’s such a struggle because they are things I eventually do have to make decisions about. There is so much more to it that would take too long to explain but in general a lot of my fears revolve around pleasing others/ understanding others emotions to ensure they’re okay, my own identity and personality, and work/school performance. Someone mentioned OCD to me because in my head it feels like I have to solve these things and will go over and over them but I seriously can’t figure out if it’s anxiety, OCD, or none of the above. It’s all very disruptive to my life. I am never not thinking or not trying to figure something out and I feel as if I have no control over it Anyone have any insight?
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