- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Going through the same thing. Stay strong!! Hang in there!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I am going through the same thing but there is hope.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Hang in there, me too. Letâs fight for this.
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 12w ago
Looking back, my introverted nature and struggles to find belonging in high school may have set the stage for how OCD would later impact my relationships. I had my first relationship in high school, but OCD wasnât a major factor then. It wasnât until my longest relationshipâsix years from age 18 to 24âthat OCD really took hold. The relationship itself wasnât the issue; it was what happened after. When it ended, I became obsessed with confessing past mistakes, convinced I had to be completely transparent. Even when my partner was willing to work past them, I couldnât let go of the intrusive thoughts, and that obsession landed me in the hospital. From there, my struggle with ROCD (Relationship OCD) fully emerged. For years, every time I tried to move forward in dating, doubts consumed me. I would start seeing someone and feel fine, but then the questions would creep in: Do I really like her? Do I find her attractive? Is she getting on my nerves? What if Iâm with the wrong person? Iâd break things off, thinking I was following my true feelings. But then Iâd question: Was that really how I felt, or was it just OCD? I tried again and again, each time hoping I could âwithstand it this time,â only to fall back into the same cycle. The back and forth hurt both me and the person I was with. By the time I realized it was ROCD, the damage had been done, and I still hadnât built the tools to manage it. Now, at 28, I know I need to approach dating differently. I recently talked to someone from a dating app, and my OCD still showed upâquestioning my every move, making me doubt my own decisions. I havenât yet done ERP specifically for ROCD, but I know thatâs my next step. Just like Iâve learned tools for managing my other OCD subtypes, I need a set of strategies for when intrusive doubts hit in relationships. My goal this year is to stop letting uncertainty control meâto learn how to sit with doubt instead of trying to âfigure it out.â I want to break the cycle and be able to build something healthy without my OCD sabotaging it. I know Iâm not alone in this, and I know healing is possible. Iâm hopeful that working with a therapist will help me develop exposures and thought loops to practice. I donât expect to eliminate doubt entirelyâafter all, doubt is a part of every relationshipâbut I want to reach a place where it doesnât paralyze me. Where I can move forward without constantly questioning whether I should. And where I can be in a relationship without feeling like OCD is pulling the strings. I would appreciate hearing about your experiences with ROCD. Please share your thoughts or any questions in the comments below. Iâd love to connect and offer my perspective. Thanks!
- Date posted
- 12w ago
Hello, I unknowingly have lived with ROCD or OCD (not sure what one. Iâm new to this). It has ruined so many amazing romantic and platonic relationships and I am so sad that just now I am finding out what the hell is wrong with me. Maybe life would be different if I have known. My OCD and anxiety is at an all time high (ATH) due to some horrible events that have happened in the recent months. I am at the point where paranoia has taken over my life now. I had my first panic attack a few weeks ago where I fainted. My anxiety attacks are so extreme I go thought cognitive distortion that has lasted days. My girlfriend of 3 years is my emotional guardian and she no long has the energy to be that and honestly itâs not her responsibility to be that. She is bi and wanted to have an open relationship and for someone who has OCD this has not been good for me. She also was assaulted in my own home by a good friend of ours when I was out of town but itâs not a clear situation because it sounded consensual at first. I just left my very high paying job. I am financially secure but the job was emotionally abusive and looking back made my OCD worse. I am taking some time off to get my head rightâŚbut now, all I have to do during the day is live in my OCD. Iâm very happy I finally figured out why I act the way I do but I donât know if I can get better quick enough to save my relationship. I have never been so worried about myself (M 28 years old). I am a confident young professional and never thought I would be writing on a page like this. AnywayâŚI hope it gets better.
- Date posted
- 8w ago
Hey everyone, First time posting here! Wanted to share my story for some support but also to hopefully make others feel less alone. In short - my ROCD has made such a mess of my personal life. I was in a great relationship until spring of last year, at which point we separated mainly due to my ROCD. I struggled heavily with OCD about 10 years ago (harm based intrusive thoughts, sexual orientation ocd, etc). It took a lot of work but I was able to mostly overcome my struggles and truthfully, hadnât given ocd much thought since then. I thought I was cured. And then 10 years later I am in a very fulfilling relationship with a girl I really love, but at about the year mark in my relationship things really changed. She wanted to have a conversation about next steps (moving in, marriage, kids, etc) and at that point my brain just went into panic mode and the ocd took over. From that point on, I was constantly scanning for red flags, felt very reserved when it came to any sort of statement or commitment and tended to avoid anything that would indicate I was committed to a long term future. It was not that I didnât love it was just that my ocd was doing anything to keep me from making a big commitment. It eventually got a point where we had a big conversation about breaking up or staying together and my OCD convinced me that it was safer and that I would do less harm to her if we ended things, which was incredibly devastating to me. At the time I felt like my obsessing over small red flags were normal and that I needed to protect myself. I just had no clue it was ROCD. I spent the next 8 months missing her and kicking myself for my mistakes, and I eventually got the courage to reach out and see if sheâd be willing to talk again, which she was. But the problem is, at this point I still didnât know it was ocd. So when we talked again I was still plagued by ROCD as all the same thoughts and feelings came flooding back. We tried to talk through things but once again I was unable to make any sort of commitment to the future so it went nowhere. Once again, I am feeling very sad and angry at myself for not being able to handle ROCD. I feel like I let it control me twice and has robbed me of a lot of happiness and hurt someone I care very much about. I understand itâs probably not best to just look at ourselves with anger and guilt all the time but itâs hard not to when you feel like you just caused so much harm. Anyone feel like they can relate? Or if anyone is going through something similar I am happy to chat as ROCD can really be tricky. Thanks
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