How do I continue to make it with the range of intrusive thoughts that I’ve had for the last 15 months? Doesn’t seem that there frequency has lessened and I’m so tired of them.

You can get through this. I'm here, on this app, because I too am in a very bad place but we cant give up hope. OCD doesn't define us. Actually dwelling on getting better cab also be a form of OCD. Vacation can be hard bc we are out of our comfort zone. I encourage you to go out and do the things you want today EVEN IF your mind is racing. Sit with them but try not to give into them. You WILL get through this. God bless you ❤

@TiredMindOverMatter Thank you so much. We are actually driving back home and I don’t wanna go home lol and yeah I probably dwell on getting better too much. So I will be blasting some feel good music on the drive.

@Dre83 That's right! You got this! Ultimately we have to be comfortable with the uncertainty. We will never know and we have to get to the point where that doesn't steal our joy. Our past, our OCD, our intrusive thoughts... they do not define us. You seem very lovely and that's my impression of you ❤. Also (and ultimately most importantly) knowing that God is in control is such a great reminder for me!

@TiredMindOverMatter My faith has become weak unfortunately. It was strong at the beginning but it has just been beaten down with all of this.

@TiredMindOverMatter I want my faith to be stronger believe me.

Thank you this shit is starting to wear on me and I’m having bouts of being depressed. I don’t have much high anxiety from the thoughts anymore but I still hate them. I’ve been seeing a therapist the whole time and I still do see one. I started seeing a psychiatric nurse practitioner to talk about medication but I’m still afraid of antidepressants from what I read about them. I definitely need to exercise as I haven’t been able to since I’m away on vacation and didn’t bring any workout clothes. I keep hearing everyone talk about this feeling better but it seems to escape me like I can put some good days together but I want more consistency.

@Dre83 I think most importantly really be present in those moments when you do feel happy and calm and good. Consistency will come later. But being fully present in the good moments will make a huge difference. I was very afraid of taking antidepressants as well, but I genuinely benefitted so much from them. Not saying you must go on medication, but definitely consider the benefits/detriments of taking something. I didn’t realize how depressed I had become from my ocd thoughts until I went on medication and realized I hadn’t even felt legitimate hunger in almost a year. If ocd is not bothering you as much but depression is, you could even go on a very low dosage of an antidepressant and see improvements. As far as consistency, try and not look at it from this angle. Appreciate each day for itself—even people without ocd and depression struggle with having a consistently good time all the time. I promise things will be better, just keep on hanging on. I am so proud of you.

@blueoceanpearl Thank you so much!

Thank you 😊