i’m so worried that if i hang out with my boyfriend i’m going to think of someone else while i’m with him. is this an intrusive thought?

Yes. I encourage you to let yourself think of someone else. Do it the whole date, and ask for it every time it doesn’t show up. Tell your ocd brain “that’s it ? That’s all your going to show me. Show me more.” If you try to resist it, ocd will win. If you encourage it, you’ve cornered ocd in its rightful corner.

wow, straight to the point! this is interesting and new and a little scary but you know what? you’re right! thanks so much for the advice. hoping this will work!

i’d also like to add, me and my boyfriend are long distance and anything i try to do just gives me an intrusive thought of one specific person and it makes me so uncomfortable. thoughts?

@bellag Ill tell you this: that one specific person doesn’t matter. Your ocd has locked in what it sees as a threat, and there’s no amount of convincing or logic you will do that will convince it anything. So what do you do? You start getting comfortable feeling uncomfortable. When you get uncomfortable, you don’t give in to any rumination. You just let the discomfort sit there. Right now you are so used to react to your thoughts and wanting to get rid of discomfort, you don’t know what life looks like just sitting still and allowing intrusive thoughts to pop up. This is a practice. This is what exporsure response therapy is about. Look into or get a therapist on this app. They will help you with this if you can’t do it on your own.

@Sasha reading that was very informative and insightful! i’ll definitely mention it to my therapist or look into one on here.

@Sasha thanks so much for your time and wise words!

@bellag Does your therapist currently specialize with ocd? I’m curious how they have been assisting you with this ocd.

@Sasha she does not. but i’m going to a psychiatrist that treats his patients with therapy and medicine. he might do ERP. my therapist now just works with people to find out the root of their problems. she does more of CBT work rather than ERP.

@bellag Yup yup. So listen- CBT is great, but if it’s not modified for ocd , it can do more bad than good. The reason is because ocd is a problem because you are “over thinking” and trying to rationalize. So when therapists try to get to “the root of the problem” they are creating more unnecessary meaning for your thoughts. That’s why I really encourage you to find someone who can do ERP and really understands how to modify cognitive behavior therapy for ocd ! Best of luck. And I’m on this chat if you have more questions. I know all this, because I went through all of this. So I’m just here to pass down this knowledge.

@Sasha it’s always a nice feeling knowing you have someone who has wisdom on this!! ive been diagnosed for about 3 years now, but it gets harder and harder i swear! i’m full of questions despite my journey so far. but i’m not sure that my therapist has modified it for OCD specifically, but she has had some other OCD patients.. but it’s good to know about the specific CBT for OCD, i’ll let her know about it and her and i can go from there. thanks again for sharing your knowledge with me!!

@bellag Of course! Check out the book, because he writes in there that a lot of therapists don’t do this, and it doesn’t help their patients. I hope you get right help that you need!

@Sasha sure will! :))

Also recommend the book “Freedom from obsessive compulsive disorder” by Johnathan Grayson