Hi, I've suffered from anxiety and OCD but this week has just been the worst. Ive suffered with ROCD in the past too.I have been with my partner for 5 years and have always felt happy and have managed to push doubts aside to stop my ROCD creeping back up again. However this week my family haven't been nice and have been filling my head with doubts about who I should be with, what type of person I should be with etc and I've felt sick with worry and have cried all week. I just want to be happy with him. I went and confided in a friend of the opposite sex and he's made a pass at me. I feel sick with guilt for even putting myself in that situation even though I said no, he apologised for making me feel uncomfortable but has now twisted the whole story to people we know. It's making me feel so ill and I feel like I have no one to turn too. I feel like how my family have been has put me in a vulnerable state and I confided in the wrong person and feel guilty for that now. He's changed the whole story of what happened and my mind is now questioning everything I did even though I know I did nothing wrong but confide in someone. I know I haven't done anything wrong but my ocd is going over and over the whole situation. I was stupid to put myself in a situation whilst being vulnerable

So I have been struggling with the same theme of ocd for 4 months now. My ocd centers around past events/false memories that ocd skews to make seem bad or it twists my thoughts on what my intentions were. this is related to cheating or being weird while I have been in my amazing relationship. I have never cheated on my partner and never will and I believe it is wrong. But my ocd is telling me other wise. I love my partner so very much and I would never want to hurt him but my brain is getting to me. I was getting better. I was trying “maybe I did, maybe I didn’t”, I have been back on meds and in therapy and I stopped confessing random interactions from years/months ago about 1.5 weeks ago and it really helped. But now I woke up this morning and feel the pit in my stomach again. I feel extra critical and like why would you do this? What does this say about you? What was your intention with this? And I’m just stuck mentally reviewing and ruminating on everything you could imagine. I know my personality and I know in the moment maybe I did find them attractive but mainly I was just being nice or funny or even just a good friend, but looking back now I’m like “was it flirting?” “Why did I still snap this person” “why would I even talk to them” and stuff like that. I feel this intense sense of guilt. I have told my partner everything that I keep getting stuck on and he didn’t care, he said he understands or “that’s a little weird but it’s okay” and hasn’t missed a beat. He said eveything I’ve told him is normal and I’ve heard that from my friends too. I just really need help. I don’t know what to do anymore. I am so disappointed because I thought I was gonna be done with this, so why am I still so worried and caught up in this.

I’ve had relationship OCD for about five months now and it’s been excruciating, I know it’s relationship OCD but my brain can’t grasp it, I was doing very well for about a week a few days or a week. It’s about the only amount of time where I feel that sense of clarity or almost back to normal definitely not normal but life seems pleasant again. I made a bad mistake. I was with my friend on a sleepover and we decided that we wanted to eat some good food and be stoned because we enjoy eating food and being stoned since it tastes much better, no I believe this just made it worse. I know that weed can be worse for some people. It can make them overthink and I think it’s triggered me to relapse, because my worries and intrusive thoughts are about something so much more worrying in a way and it feels so much more real, I guess I’m hyper focusing on every single thing about my partner’s personality every floor and everything he doesn’t do, and my brain is telling me that means I should break up with him, ”if he dosent do this this means the relationship isn’t right” “ or anything happens my brain will tell me that I’m losing interest or losing feelings and I get many intrusive statements. Like “you like being single more” literally any time I’m enjoying myself alone And I’m getting many that don’t make sense “he doesn’t accept you for who you are so that means that you need to break up” over an interest that we both have…… And it’s so frustrating because any time I talk to him about anything serious or obviously I’m not happy about something because that’s normal in relationships not everyone is gonna do everything right so you have to communicate it but then I could get intense urge to break up and it makes me upset, or when I’m trying to tell him how I feel my brain will just say that I need to break up it’s honestly so confusing and I’m falling back into the compulsions and reassurance seeking all over again and my brain is making me believe it’s not relationship OCD because what if it’s not relationship OCD and it’s actually not the right relationship for me? But I don’t want it to be that I love him so much and I honestly can’t imagine not being with him. It’s so confusing and my head hurts and I just need someone to talk to.

Ocd sucks. I’m at a stay away multiple days long event for school rn and ran into someone I used to talk with. We had a will they won’t they kind of thing for years and knew each other all growing up. I knew when we were really young that he had a crush on me for a while. And then when we got older there were times I had a crush on him but I don’t think he liked me anymore at that point. I never fully knew where he stood because he often was in a relationship or living somewhere else. Because we never dated or kissed or anything, only hung out on ambiguous date-like occasions, there has always been that what if sitting there for me and I hadn’t seen or spoken to him since before I met my current partner years ago. Well they happen to be at this place I’m staying at, where we are in the same places everyday, and I ran into them, said hi and caught up for a bit. It has totally triggered my ROCD in a way I’ve never experienced. I feel guilt and shame and keep having intrusive thoughts that are so extreme and catastrophic like what if I leave my partner of 8 years for him, what if I find him more attractive than my partner, what if I cross a line while I’m interacting with him this week, what if I’m a terrible girlfriend to my partner and a fraud??