A NOCD friend posted requests for how to start something and how not to get locked into perfectionism once started.
This post is not an answer to those, at least not a magical thing that always works and doesnāt feel like pulling teeth.
Iāve been thinking about using my planner/journal again. Iāve been planning it in my head. Now Iām āforcingā myself to actually write in it today.
It doesnāt feel ārightā. There is so much missing that āneedsā to be addressed and filled. All of this makes me dread doing it. ** Writing this NOCD post might even be another stall tactic in disguise; however, posting about anything here always makes me feel more accountable. I know if I share it here I feel all of ya. Even when I donāt listen to myself/do it for myself, for everyone here, itās more manageable.
So Iām āforcingā that first journal post. Iām not turning it into an all night make-up post for the past 7 weeks I missed, though later, I may fill in whatās helpful and already accounted. ** I donāt feel āreadyā for it. I donāt want to do it. But Iām going to. Maybe I should tell my OCD what I tell my dog when he sasses me. I remind him that I am more stubborn than he is. So Iāll now be more stubborn than my OCD. It may have taken days of sitting around thinking about it, but Iām doing it. No more just thinking.
** (Also doing this as an edit style rather than more āperfectlyā inserting itā) I am also not waiting for September 1st! So now itās also uneven! The reset button isnāt being pushed on another, predetermined beginning. But itās still happening TONIGHT.
May we all be more stubborn than our issues. šŖš¼š