Do I have a crush on this person because I get anxious around them and when they txt me I want to see the message right away and answer immediately?? I’ve been having obsessive thoughts about this person. They are assigned sex at birth a girl but appear “masculine” and date girls. Ever since I had the thought “would I be les/bi if I develop a crush on them?” I kept having thoughts that I like them. They are also my friend and it’s hard to distinguish if I have a crush on them or is it because my obsessive thoughts?

Omg thank you so much I feel so much better knowing what it’s called

@kaylangel4 And you're welcome ahha

It's just ocd, you are NOT supposed to imagine yourself in scenarios with them to check if you like it or not because that's what gets you in the downward spiral of ocd and creates even more ruminating. You just need to relax and realize that it's ocd thoughts and avoid doing any type of compulsion and after a few days you will feel better and have less intrusive thoughts about it.

@Anonymous I’m undiagnosed btw, I try to keep myself busy and talk to this guy that I like but the image of her is like a background in my head. I try to sit with it, yet it leads to more rumination. I can’t get internalized homophobia out of my mind either

@Kärsiä I highly recommend doing the nocd program with a therapist so that you can plan strategy to overcome ocd. I'm not a therapist but I'm pretty sure you probably have ocd based on what you have said, you can't stop thinking about it and you probably have anxiety and are really worried I bet, and you said you imagine yourself in scenarios to check and you ruminate a lot, those are all signs of ocd. You should watch "ozzy Jimenez" on YouTube, he has some good videos of hocd and he explains well what to do to get better, it doesn't hurt to watch.

@Anonymous Thank you, although NOCD isn’t available in my country and it’s so hard to find an OCD therapist so I have to resort to keep searching online that deals international. I’ll make sure to watch his YouTube vids too.

@Kärsiä Yeah, I can give you a few tips to get better. Find things that trigger you and get you to have anxiety. To get better you have to do erp, but thats best with a therapist so that you don't do it wrong. For now, just avoid compulsions which are, do not avoid your triggers, do not seek reassurance, and do not imagine yourself in scenarios to check if you like it or not. If you take part in any of those, you are feeding your ocd and it will get worse. They're just thoughts and feelings that mean nothing but our ocd over analyze them and make everything worse. I understand that reassurance makes you feel good, but it only lasts a little bit then ocd will come back so you have to not reassure yourself, it will be very hard to sit in the uncomfort, but thats what will make you recover. Don't engage with thoughts or ruminate because you're giving validity to a thought that has no meaning. It will be hard but you will get better and just have hope. The hard part is that it feels so real but don't worry, you got this!