I cant even look at guys on the street in the eyes. Does not help that I work in food industry, when Im serving guys that trigger me, I lose all focus and get very weird and I know they would tell if I dont have a mask on. My body language completely changes and I get extremely nervous, It wasnt this bad before but now Its crazy. Idk If its good or bad or If I want to or not. When It feels like I want to, I get depressed and confused.
I want to go back to being normal but I dont know at all what my normal should look like. Also does anyone here genuinely confused about their sexuality, If they are straight or gay? Is this still hocd?