just need to vent. people are weird and they ask backhanded questions. i sit with my friends at a table in a class. some kid at my table asked me if i liked "boys in dresses" and i panicked and said yes sarcastically. but i don't think my friends caught onto my sarcasm. mind you - i'm gay & not out of the closet. i have ocd but i also obsess about social situations and it's not exactly the best thing for my mental health. i'm just worried that they're going to spread rumors about me "liking boys in dresses" saying yes to that question. i also think it'll warp their view of me. i wish i would've clarified but i just panicked and sat there and couldn't wait for a subject change. ironically i don't actually find boys in dresses attractive... but it's whatever. i suck at handling social situations and i wish i would've handled the problem better. i just feel like i gave a dead giveaway and now everyone thinks i'm gay. it sucks because that's a self declaration i want to have for myself - not by other people. being outed to the whole school doesn't sound like a fun thing. my ocd keeps replaying the event over and over and trying to get me to fix it. but the moment's passed. and i hate myself for it. i'm planning on coming out soon ish anyways. it just sucks that i let it slip that easily.