it just feels so real and i don't even panic anymore. it's like i don't care. i do! i feel like i have accepted myself as bi :( i don't want that. and please refrain from commenting triggering stuff. it's just that i don't panic at the thoughts anymore nor do i feel anxious, but i still feel gay in denial and even that doesn't spook me much, i just ignore it. but isn't ignoring a sign of denial??? i just feel like i am but can't even bother with panicking or worrying about it. there's a lot of "proof" in my past and i keep on seeing some stuff that should be triggering but i am able to simply ignore it and stop myself from ruminating over it. i don't think i ever had ocd :( i just feel like i used it as a coverup for my denial

I don’t know what to do anymore, this started nearly a year ago and caused so much stress and panic attacks over the thought of loosing my boyfriend. Now it just feels real and that he always liked girls and suppressed it (but like the boys i always liked in the past were real feelings they had to be and with my boyfriend i love him) but i haven’t got much anxiety now feels like i want the thoughts and that they don’t bother me even tho they used to, this seems to happen every time i get a lil better, idk just feels so true and that’s what i acc want with no stress, just a lil scared.

im so scared that this is just denial and that im actuall gay. idk what to do anymore i need help. its just constant anxiety in my chest and i hate it. is there anything i can do to help?

i had recently been triggered to have so-ocd. its been on my mind non-stop. (i am a heterosexual female) and my mind has been all over the place questioning if i have been in denial the entire time. ive always had people tell me they sort of got that vibe it it never really affected me until my own mother had her suspicions. so i would constantly get triggered un public around the same gender, while knowing my true sexuality. ive always been attracted to men but as of recently ive been having super bad anxiety to where i cannot eat or sleep and feel weak all the time. it was like that for a week or so. now im in the calm where i have been trying accept the uncertainty but it still isnt fair as im getting triggered. im a little worried because it feels like i have been lying to my parents the entire time although ive never had the desire to be with the same gender. and i keep getting intrusive thoguhts that make me feel anxious and uncomfortable. its all starting to affect my friendships as im constantly getting triggered with the intrusive thoguhts. i feel a little less anxious compared to how i was a couple days ago. im really scared on why im having these thoughts now when i have been having romantic feelings for a guy the past year or so. ive also been struggling with false attraction and loss attraction to men. it makes me feel uncertain of my life the entire time