anonymousN
- Date posted
- 4y
CesarCesar
- Date posted
- 4y
Ocd will have you focus on things that trigger you because your brain is determined to falsely keep you safe, depending on what your theme is, your brain will try to find it, it may be even when you least expect it, understand one thing, you have ocd, ocd is a liar and does not define you nor does it tell you who you are. If I was to tell you to go drink water right now would you do it? The answer should be no. I am not you nor do I tell you what to do, ocd is the same, ocd is not you nor should it tell you what to do. Therapy will help you find yourself again and use your values to start making decisions again. Your gender is not defined by what people say nor what you hear nowadays, that is a bigger topic to discuss but please seek therapy. Don't be afraid, you're never alone.
GiftyoyGiftyoy
- Date posted
- 4y
I really need help on this too I'm obsessed about d small size of my bathroom coz deres a toilet in it too so I get irritated at the tot so boom! One day a tot came up that this is not a bathroom but a toilet so I even felt more irritated that I am bathing in a small bathroom which I now see as toilet . Coz of this I repeatedly open my bathroom door to analyse the tot I can open my bathroom door 20 times a day this tot ibeen in my head for like 3months now.
CesarCesar
- Date posted
- 4y
@Giftyoy Seek help, don't be afraid to ask for help
anonymousNanonymousN
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you that really helps . I try to remind myself of this but sometimes I get so scared that I have changed forever . I am in therapy I just started I hope I see the light at the end of the tunnel soon
LovelyNightLovelyNight
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel like social media is the biggest reason for this. It absolutely causes many people to be more confused if they weren't already. I'm a grown woman but if I were younger, I might also be pulled into that. Gender isn't a malleable thing, it's just biology and the problem I see is from childhood girls and boys are expected to behave and look a certain way that leads to even more confusion because not all girls have a preference for the color pink, play with dolls and enjoy wearing dresses. Tom Boys almost stopped existing lately but when I was younger even in my teen years, I was a tomboy because I didn't fit the gender stereotype of a girl but now you're told if you don't that you might be another gender which is quite scary and makes many vacillate between thoughts of what gender they are and mental health issues worsen this complicated dance of thoughts.
anonymousNanonymousN
- Date posted
- 4y
This is true , I always liked the girly stuff and I still do idk why but ocd tells me I hate it even though that’s what made me happy before
girlanongirlanon
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
@anonymousN While I personally disagree that gender is biology I see your main point. I literally despise my body now.
mari01mari01
- Date posted
- 4y
We live in a gender and self identity obsessed culture, this stuff is naturally triggering. Social media doesn’t help either.
[Deleted][Deleted]
- Date posted
- 4y
Comment deleted by user
anonymousNanonymousN
- Date posted
- 4y
Everytime I feel like I know it just convinces me I don’t and it messes with my identity so bad
Imaan7Imaan7
- Date posted
- 4y
Same except with hocd, my whole perception of man and woman has changed and its honestly caused me immense pain
CesarCesar
- Date posted
- 4y
What did your values tell you about men and women before ocd?
Imaan7Imaan7
- Date posted
- 4y
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. Well my memory has become bad so I cant remmeber how I used to think before but I only looked at women as partners. I also didnt think about sexuality at all before but after hocd, so much rumination and learning about sexuality, intrusive thoughts( If thats what they are), I understand that its ok if someone likes the same sex but thats causing me confusion, so anytime I look at a guy or talk to them It feels like I could also like them the same way I liked girls. It bascially shifted my perception of typical Man-Woman and how I viewed both genders to se degree. Hope that made some sense?
CesarCesar
- Date posted
- 4y
@Imaan7 Have you been to a therapist or talked about it with anyone?
Imaan7Imaan7
- Date posted
- 4y
@NOCD Advocate - Cesar O. No, but I opened up to my family last night after dealing with this for year and a half. They would support therapy but what do you think? Does that sound like ocd at all? Thats just one of the big thought process that I got after ocd
CesarCesar
- Date posted
- 4y
@Imaan7 That's good I'm glad you spoke to your family and I'm glad they support therapy. The sad thing is that this ocd is called the doubting disease which means that even if I say yes it's ocd, some times after you will doubt my answer and will start questioning these thoughts. This is what ocd is like. My dear brother God loves you as you are, put yourself in His hands let Him guide you through recovery. Have faith. No matter what your preference is sexually it doesn't not rule your life. There's so much beauty and meaning in life than just who turns you on. Sexual attraction is still not completely studied nor understood but even then it should not be the focus of your life. Attraction shouldn't bring you disgust nor anxiety it should bring you joy and good emotions. If you are anxious by thought of liking a gender you're not sure of then it mean you're not attracted at all. Ocd is lying to you. Seek therapy trust your Heavenly Father. He loves you. God bless
girlanongirlanon
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes. This. I think I'm trans now, I think maybe I always have been, I think I'll never be able to go back, if there was even a back to go to.
Imaan7Imaan7
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey I relate to what you said in your profile, Im having a hard time remembering my past self. I have a feeling like I was always gay just didnt notice it. Cant really remember how I used to think back then, memorys real hazy
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 4y
i understand—seeing all these new words and concepts can be very stressful to understand and digest. i think it's important to remember that someone else's mode of identity is their own and your identity is yours alone to describe as well. if you feel like you're happy with how you identify now, that's cool! and if you happen to change your mind sometime down the line, that's a-okay too. don't be pressured to identify as something you're not comfortable with. all of these new concepts are really just meant for people who didn't feel like traditional gender roles and perceptions of sexuality fit them personally. questioning shouldn't be a distressing experience honestly—it should be an enlightening one! don't force yourself to question if it's only hurting you, just be yourself and vibe ✨
Related posts
geodrimilis
- Date posted
- 24w
I need this to end.
I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 18w
I feel so different from others
I feel different from others, I don’t feel as feminine and I feel like I’ve changed. I’m not sure why I feel this way. I also don’t think my ocd is ocd, it’s just something I told myself to feel better. I know! What if I am what if I’m not, I get it, but I don’t feel like i have a choice in the matter anymore. I have soocd and it’s eaten me alive for years. I woke up out of my sleep and got triggered and here I am. I don’t know what I feel anymore. I always wanted a boyfriend and now It seemed to change. I don’t want a girlfriend, it’s just that I don’t see anything for myself and I feel like I’m hiding. It’s hard to explain. Plus sometimes the way I move or speak makes me feel more masculine and it kills me. Im feeling so lost and alone right now. I know what I want deep down but I feel incapable of having those things because I won’t be able to have feeling. If that makes sense.
g_rangel
- Date posted
- 16w
spiraling again.
i had recently been triggered to have so-ocd. its been on my mind non-stop. (i am a heterosexual female) and my mind has been all over the place questioning if i have been in denial the entire time. ive always had people tell me they sort of got that vibe it it never really affected me until my own mother had her suspicions. so i would constantly get triggered un public around the same gender, while knowing my true sexuality. ive always been attracted to men but as of recently ive been having super bad anxiety to where i cannot eat or sleep and feel weak all the time. it was like that for a week or so. now im in the calm where i have been trying accept the uncertainty but it still isnt fair as im getting triggered. im a little worried because it feels like i have been lying to my parents the entire time although ive never had the desire to be with the same gender. and i keep getting intrusive thoguhts that make me feel anxious and uncomfortable. its all starting to affect my friendships as im constantly getting triggered with the intrusive thoguhts. i feel a little less anxious compared to how i was a couple days ago. im really scared on why im having these thoughts now when i have been having romantic feelings for a guy the past year or so. ive also been struggling with false attraction and loss attraction to men. it makes me feel uncertain of my life the entire time
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