Also, does anyone feel like they almost have like two brains? not personalities just feeling okay and not okay? hard to explain

It feels like and angel/devil on my shoulder kind of deal. It feels im having constant arguments in my head with a bully

YESS!!!! are you on any medication or therapy? i really want to start zoloft

@bricady (she/her) I take lmaotrigine which is a mood stabilizer. SSRI’s dont work on me they make me feel worse. I also have BPD. If it works for you thats great! Thats what I take and what has worked for me for the past 4 years

It can definitely feel that way sometimes!

Yess I feel this way all the time and I never really noticed it till recently. Like it’s me the person I known forever and than the ocd. It’s weird to describe because it feels like I’m hiding another part of me. Sometimes I’m glad we can’t know what other people are thinking because if people did know I don’t think I would have anything I have right now :(

YES exactly how u worded it. like YOU and then ur OCD

@bricady (she/her) Yeah it’s so scary I feel like a fraud sometimes and I’m scared of slipping up one of these days

I feel this way too. Like part of me is fine/okay and the other part is OCD always running in the background.

yep. hit it right in the money

Always running in the background I like that.

Oh, yeah. The ADHD, the OCD, and the RSD are three little biatches separate from me.

That's a tough combo!

YES! one half of me always feels like a me I have known for a long time, the other part is screaming at me STOP WHAT YOU‘re doing you are dangerous you are in denial bla bla! It’s very exhausting. Sometimes I get this extreme urge to move and do something ‚or else‘ but at the same time I‘m just laying down in my bed not moving at all.

@CatLove9 Oh my good I have this SO OFTEN. I will lay there but inside it’s just screaming and my brain is like YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING you’re guilty you’re eternally fucked up somethings wrong somethings wrong but on the outside I‘m just in my bed soo weirdly calm trying to make peace with myself lol. I’m so glad (but also sad for you of course) you know this feeling. It’s like two separate entities fighting. We really need to end the war and leave the battlefield 🥰

@CatLove9 Or you’re just like scrolling and trying to distract yourself not even moving but your heart and head are freaking out and it feels like you’ve lost your mind

It's a tug of war sometimes.

yessss I have heard many people experiencing this and feeling this way! I think that's partly why OCD is so maddening. Part of you knows that this is silly, doesn't make sense but part of you still feels like it's really real.

yes yes 100%