- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey, please can you give me some good SO-OCD exposures?? I’m struggling with figuring it all out
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi! I’ve started with photos of lesbian couples, quotes about lesbians, writing out the word “lesbian”, as my lower hierarchies. Higher up’s that I’ve tried but are too much are reading books about someone realizing they’re gay, and an article about it too (they’re always married to a man and then leave them for a woman, which is my ultimate fear).
- Date posted
- 3y
@LizLemon That’s my ultimate fear too! With that, what are you supposed to do after? Just sit with the anxiety?
- Date posted
- 3y
@milliemoo Yes! I take deep breaths, and when the thoughts pop up, which for me are “do I like this? Do I want this?” Or images of me with a woman pop up, I tell my mind that it could potentially be me, but it’s probably not the way I feel right now. And then you just sit with the anxiety until it undoubtedly goes away. This is what makes it *SO hard*, but I usually have way less intrusive thoughts for a while after doing these exposures.
- Date posted
- 3y
Also practicing self-compassion is good. One of my core fears/beliefs is that I’m unworthy and unlovable, so practicing the belief that I’m worthy of love no matter what the circumstances can help alleviate the immediate fear I feel. Again, HARDDDD! But that’s short term pain for long term gain.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you! I really appreciate you explaining this to me! I’m glad it’s helping you, I’ll give it a try :)
- Date posted
- 3y
@milliemoo Of course! It’s very hard and I’m still in the process of healing- I have a ways to go. But I do see how effective ERP + CFT are. Best of luck to you!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Break up letters, break up songs, songs about love, break up movies, rocd scripts
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you!
- Date posted
- 3y
These are also both of my subtypes! How do you guys cope with the feelings of guilt and sadness?
- Date posted
- 3y
So sorry, I know how hard feeling sad and guilty is ☹️ I’ve been practicing self compassion via Kimberly Quinlan’s workbook “The Self-Compassion Workbook for OCD” and it really helps me in those moments. One of my core beliefs that drives OCD is a lack of love and self-worth, and this workbook helps remind you that you’re worthy of compassion regardless of ANY thoughts or feelings you have. Radical self-acceptance.
- Date posted
- 3y
@LizLemon Thank you, I’ll look into that :) just really want these feelings to just be background noises so I can have my life fully back again :(
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous I’m with you- I keep saying I’m fighting for my life. The fight is worth it though, the therapy absolutely works, you just need to advocate for yourself against this ocd. Really figure out what your triggers are, rate them from 1-10 anxiety levels, start low and build up from there. I’ve been doing this for just under two weeks and already feel a difference. I have a ways to go, but I feel more confident than ever that it’s possible to be like everyone else and have thoughts just float on without attachment. I’m here to talk and support you when needed! We’ve got this!
- Date posted
- 3y
@LizLemon Thank you Liz! I am working with a therapist and going on my 6th session Tuesday. I agree, it has helped a lot but there are also bad days that makes me feel like I’m going nowhere. Just like you, I have ways to go! I’m just trying to live my life to the fullest without it impacting me. I also recently got engaged and the OCD definitely does not help.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
My NOCD therapist (who has been awesome) and I are both struggling to identify ways in which I can practice exposure therapy while in-session, because the vast majority of my OCD symptoms are mental compulsions. For example: indecision and inability to commit to a choice; seeking reassurance on decisions from friends and family; mental review of things that have just happened / social situations; over-thinking and catastrophizing. I also have some other hallmark symptoms (contamination fears, moral scrupulosity, etc) but those tend to be inconsistent too. It’s hard to really practice these during my sessions because so many are in the moment and fleeting. By the time I join my session they are no longer active. How can we establish exposure responses during my sessions, if most of my OCD involves mental rumination and overthinking patterns/thought loops that only occur “in the moments - rather than specific or consistent compulsions (such as hand washing)?
- Date posted
- 24w
I have just recently realized that I had SO OCD. This began whenever I was watching porn and had an intrusive thought about the guy in the porn. It was more minor at first, it was a majority of what I was thinking about throughout the day but it didn’t feel as distressing at first. If I had downtime to think about it, it would affect me but if I was just going about my day I wouldn’t notice it. I began going through the compulsions of checking myself. This lasted for a while until another obsession occurred. Then it seemed as if my SO OCD took a step back. I would have flare ups but they would seem to pass. Recently, I had a very bad night of constant compulsions and looking at pictures and imagining things to check myself. After that night it was very distressing, it affected me to the point where people around me began to notice and ask me if I was okay. One of the big reasons I was so upset was my girlfriend, we have been together for over 3 years and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I was thinking “Oh my god, if I am gay I can never be with her.” I would sit and cry about it thinking I would lose her and that might life would change because I was gay. I finally had enough and talked to her and my parents. We did some research and I was so shocked to find out that I had a form of OCD, it was like a weight being lifted off my shoulders just knowing that other people have been where I am and that I’m not gay. However, I may have naively expected the compulsions and obsessive thoughts to go away now that I knew I had an actual problem. But I found that the compulsions and thoughts were still there and I was going to put some effort into getting better. I have researched and now know what to do when experiencing intrusive thoughts, yet I still have been performing the compulsions which is just feeding into the OCD. I find myself having intrusive thoughts and then start performing compulsions to see if they are true. What really bothers me is when I have an intrusive thought that tells me that I do like something. But when I think about it I have no desire to pursue those thoughts. However when I feed into the compulsions they just seem to feed into each other. It is like my OCD ignores all the things that I know I like and goes straight to panic mode. I am also trying to do ERP and am going to start doing my best to get better. Does anyone have any tips for not performing the compulsions no matter how anxious you are feeling and no matter how real the intrusive thoughts seem to feel?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 14w
Hi all! I was wondering if anyone being treated with ROCD and/or SOOCD has some advice on how they handle the things *with* their partner. For context, my ex and I were together ~7 months before we broke up a year ago, in large part due to my severe anxiety from untreated ROCD/SOOCD. I’ve gotten a lot better through NOCD treatment and we’ve been friends since then. But we’re currently in a “situationship” kind of stage, where I think we’re both trying to figure out if the relationship is still feasible, and I’m finding that I’m a lot more triggered as the relationship nears becoming “serious” again. We’re both really trying to figure out the healthiest way to handle when things get hard for me. Does anyone have input about what they’ve learned or found what has worked in their own relationships? Some specific questions: - I’ve found that when getting really triggered in my own head, I have no clue if I should explain how I’m feeling to my partner or how we should address it together. How do you differentiate between communicating versus falling into the confessing/reassurance trap? - Related to the above, my partner and I are both a bit lost on the best way for him to respond when I’m really paranoid (for examples, I have major I’m-being-cheated-on paranoia and overanalyze if I’m enjoying sex enough), or if I’m overreacting to feeling rejected/misunderstood (e.g. “he didn’t respond to my comment just now, he doesn’t care/he doesn’t get me/maybe we shouldn’t be together…”) - How much does your partner know about ROCD/SOOCD in general? How much have you shared with them about your thoughts and experiences? I’ve explained both subtypes and some of my thought processes to him, but definitely not all of it, and I’m not sure how much is helpful for him to know. Answers to any or all of the questions are very much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance! Hope you’re all well 💗
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