- Username
- Sarah🕊
- Date posted
- 3y ago
What you are describing sounds like something we call the "backdoor spike". This is when you start to experience less anxiety in response to our unwanted thoughts so then you have anxiety about why you don't have anxiety! You wonder whether you have OCD at all. In reality, there are many reasons you might experience this decrease in anxiety. Try not to figure out whether or not this decrease in anxiety means you do or don't have OCD. When you feel the need to figure it out, see if you can practice the phrase "Maybe I do have OCD, maybe I don't." and then continuing with what you were doing.
Definitely going through this. It’s so strange. Feeling calm but still feel undertones of fear sadness anger doubt. Confused emotions because I still have the intrusive thoughts yet I’m not reacting to them as much which also worries me..trying my best not to engage with the intrusive thoughts and ruminate which is so difficult especially with false memory. The intrusive thoughts still bother me and make me really sad....but then I get moments where I’m calmer and I’m crying most of the day and just so depressed and feeling hopeless.
I have been feeling the same. Some days its like do i even have it and if I don’t whatever i have been denying is true and if that doesn’t cause me anxiety too my brain just litres tries to shut off cause i am exhausted
It’s so strange. I don’t understand ...and sometimes when I have the calm moments it causes more doubt and I start to think am I accepting my intrusive thoughts? I haven’t started ERP yet. Also when I feel calm I start to try to think about my intrusive thoughts or more accurately I want to hold onto them which sounds weird but it’s almost like if I’m not stressed about this thought what does that mean?...is that normal?
This is all normal as far as I can tell. I was diagnosed years ago but didn’t truly accept it until fairly recently. You will have good days and bad days. Once I accepted this, I needed to motivate myself to get further help. I began ERP a few weeks ago and it has dramatically helped me. This mental illness is so challenging and all consuming as it permeates your life. But it doesn’t need to be that way. What your experiences are, many people have had the same things. But it is also so personal because its our fight that we confront by ourselves. This place is a great spot to share and know that you are not alone and that what you are going through, most of is have or are right now.
OCD comes with ups and downs in its intensity. this is part of the disorder. when you have a period of being okay and then your symptoms suddenly worsen, this is known as a relapse. it is very common for people going through treatment to relapse as well.
also, of course OCD comes with brief periods of feeling relief. that is part of the cycle - have intrusive thought, obsess, do the compulsion and/or seek reassurance, feel temporary relief. then the pattern repeats.
I feel the same way, it's also the reason that I don't want to help myself before getting professional help. If I suddenly got better it would feel like I was faking it. It would invalidate my suffering.
I feel this
Good point about the inconsistency of OCD. Most times right bow when I catch myself wanting to confess, I tell myself to live in the area of uncomfortableness and allow my body and mind to do what it needs to do to work through it.
Not sure if this is normal, but all of a sudden, like within days, it seems as though my OCD is completely gone and I’m really confused. Any advice or experience with this would be great. Thanks
Can OCD calm down for no reason? I’ve always had pretty bad symptoms and it’s usually quite overwhelming, but recently I’ve moved to uni and for some reason my symptoms are minor now, there’s still some there but I can cope with them? It seems like a good thing but at the same time I feel like I’ve been faking this whole time.
I had my first real severe OCD flare up almost two weeks ago and it scared the living crap out of me (intrusive thoughts). At the time I had no idea what it was and it was causing insane anxiety and panic attacks. After a bit of research and reaching out to numerous professionals for help with anxiety, I then learned it was OCD. I had a pretty bad week and then started to feel better. The thoughts were still there but I felt like I was learning / understanding how to just not fall victim to them. Now today, I had what I felt like was a bad day. Had what I think was a derealization type episode. Horrified it was going to turn me into someone else. I can’t even explain. I calmed down, but ever since it happened I’ve had ocd on loop about how that specific event happened and what could happen next time if it does happen again. Im truly scared for it to happen again. I was stuck in a loop for hours. Then now just all of the sudden I feel ok. Like a moment of clarity that I know what all of it was. Like I know it was the ocd. And that I’ll handle it better next time. And that I’ll be ok. But then my brain tries to tell me I have more than ocd. That I’m actually losing it. Has anyone experienced these moments before? I know people have good days and bad days but has anyone wone had days where they feel like it’s unbearable but then a couple hours later feel like you have your mind and rational back? Or should I actually be concerned there’s something else going on here? I meet with my therapist on Friday and will fill her in on all this, even though it’s only my second session with her, but just wanted to see if anyone could relate.
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond