- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I once worked as a caregiver. White lies happened often where I could not explain the full truth or the patient could not understand it. I began to look at the difference between a white lie due to the truth not being explainable, and one with the truth being explainable. So now if I need to keep something something myself for safety, I try to give enough of the truth without hurting myself. I'm focusing on the point I want to get across while speaking as much truth as I know how.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thanks for sharing your story. My situation is like this. My partner doesnt want to know everything about my solo sex life. Like when and how i masturbate for example. One day i had to say a white lie about a thing to protect her from knowing more about my sex life. Which is what she wanted because she didnt want to know. But still i feel dishonest telling white lie even though she doesnt want to hear the full truth because that is part o my private sex life. Hope that makes sense. :-)
- Date posted
- 3y
For example if you miss removing all items from masturbation. Like it could happen we are all human. And then partner accidentaly might see something. I would say a white lie to not tell what was going on because she have said that she doesnt want to know. So i am beeing kind not telling and confessing but still beeing forced to feel dishonest.
- Date posted
- 3y
White lies happen all the time. I wouldn’t feel too bad about it if it’s a rare occurrence.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 15w
Tonight I accidentally backed into my aunt’s car after leaving a family event. There was very minor damage and she said it was no big deal and not to worry about it but I feel so sick with guilt. I cannot stop crying and replaying the event over and over again. I’m worried she is secretly mad at me. How do you handle making minor mistakes and not obsessing over them?
- Date posted
- 9w
Hi all, I’ve just started a new relationship with the most amazing woman. She recently asked me when the last time I had sex was, and my mind immediately went back to a time in April this year. I felt peace after telling her that, but the next morning I woke up feeling dread because I remembered that there was actually a time a month after that (in early May) when I was sexual with someone else but there was no intercourse. I had no intention to deceive my girlfriend when I told her that the last time I had sex was in April. I now feel like I need to let my girlfriend know about the early May incident because even though the last time I had intercourse was in April, I was sexual with someone in early May. Both incidents happened before I met my girlfriend. Then there was a time in mid-June when I messaged the woman I was sexual with in early May, but I immediately deleted that message without waiting for a reply and blocked her and nothing physical happened. That was after my girlfriend and I had been talking for about a month but hadn’t committed to each other to be exclusive, but we had said that we weren’t talking to anyone else at the time. I had forgotten about that incident until my girlfriend recently asked me when the last time I had sex was. Since my girlfriend and I have committed to each other to be exclusive, I haven’t had any contact with any other woman that could be seen as betrayal. I can’t stop thinking that I lied to my girlfriend about the last time I had sex and that I need to tell her about the contact attempt with the other woman in mid-June, even though both were before her and I committed to each other to be exclusive. Is this my OCD being overly morally scrupulous and over-thinking, or do I need to confess to my girlfriend? Her and I have built a great foundation of trust and intimacy and I don’t want to ruin that. And what would be a good ERP way to deal with this?
- Date posted
- 20d
I have this intense urge to need to confess something about my past to my boyfriend. We’ve been dating almost two years and when we first started talking, I had told him about my past. I cannot fully remember everything I told him, as it was a while ago. One time I remembered something that I didn’t tell him and confessed because I felt so guilty. This was something that I actually didn’t tell him because I had forgotten about it. I am having a similar situation now where I told him about this person, but I don’t think I went into detail (I don’t remember if I did or didn’t), but I have a memory of me telling him I didn’t want to go into details about it and him saying that’s okay (I don’t fully know if this is a real memory or fake one). I now have been obsessing over this situation from my past and feel like I need to confess or else I’m a bad girlfriend, but at the same time he told me that if I remember something I don’t need to tell him unless I really can’t help it. He also said that he’s not upset about my past and I’m the one who needs to forgive myself, which I know he is right about but I don’t know how to do that without feeling like I need to confess. Any tips on how to manage these thoughts and how to stop confession compulsions?
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