I feel like Im being attracted to this therapist I may see soon. Ive seen his picture and spoken to him once and Im getting scenarios etc, no anxiety nothing. Just a little uncomfortable frankly idek what I feel when this happens Bizzarre thing is this happens with women too, like Id immediately start getting romantic thoughts with them and scenarios of me dating them and doing stuff, but the one with girls feel relatively nice although it becomes exhausting when it starts happening with every woman i see but the thoughts with guys feel more real and idk they just feel like they are more true and likely to happen This has to mean im bisexual right? Like it just feels like it is me, Im worried that Im full gay instead of bi though. Ughhh. Im so fucking sick of this.

Hi everyone, I’ve been really anxious lately, and I just need to get this out of my head. Someone recently told me that maybe I’m bisexual — that I might be more sexually attracted to women, but more romantically attracted to men. That bisexuality is not 50/50. And ever since I heard that, I’ve been spiraling. The thing is: I don’t want this to be true. It scares me. I don’t feel romantic attraction to women, I’ve never wanted to be in a relationship with one. But yes, I get aroused by fantasies involving women — and that makes me feel broken or like I’ve been lying to myself. I love my boyfriend deeply, I don’t want to lose him. I want to feel fully connected to him, physically and emotionally. But now I’m stuck in this obsessive loop of questioning: “What if I’m just in denial?” “What if I’m not really straight?” “What if this is why my libido is low?” It’s exhausting, and I don’t know if this is OCD, anxiety, or if something is fundamentally wrong. Has anyone else felt this split — romantic feelings for one gender, sexual feelings for another? I feel so alone and scared. Thanks for listening.

there is this guy in my university. i think he looks good. but since im so afraid of liking someone else, everytime i see him i have wild intrusive thoughts about him. everytime he looks at me i imagine the tension. i hate it so much i hate him so much. yesterday, i saw him look at me multiple times but i avoided the thought. after a while, the picture of him wanting me desperately came to mind again and i thought “what if he liked me and what if he came and told me that i want a relationship with you” and i imagined that. i instantly got pulled and felt like id wanna be with him. like really really wanna be with him. and simultaneously i was terrified of thinking that so in the back of my mind i was screaming NO NO DONT THINK THIS and it felt like i was falling off from a building. but i thought it again and i had the same feeling. I love my boyfriend to death, i feel like im betraying him. Am i? I realized after days of rumination, that I had no reason for my attraction. Its not like I had any kind of physical bodily attraction. I thought the face was nice. But I didn’t even know the person. Why would I feel such a strong urge to be with someone I don’t even know? I thought it was invalid, but I strongly think it is because I have projected a personality on him that I would want to be with. He held a meeting today. Hes my colleague in a club. I was in the meeting. For the first half hour, I was stressed because I hadn’t written down a thought I had previously had. I was doing my work simultaneously. I was talking to people simultaneously. When I paid attention to the guy, I thought “yeah see he’s just a normal person, plus he has an ugly voice” the minute I thought this, I turned into a fan girl of his fully and I loved the voice I felt like I had a crush. And then I panicked. I moved past it. After a while, while he was talking, a little girl screamed in the background. I immediately pictured his younger sister. Like I pictured him having a sister and she looked kindof yk like him. Basically my first instinct was oh she might be so cute. See I think he looks nice, so I kinda pictured him having a sister who was pretty and all cute like how he looked. And then I flipped out while at the same time getting a one second black out, after which I had flashes and images of him being a father and me being attracted to that. I just got random flashes of images and I felt attracted to that I think. Im not too sure. I don’t remember any feeling/ thought/ order at all. It kept on replaying in my head and while contemplating about it I thought it is probably cuz I don’t know anything about their personal lives so it feels enticing to know that they have a personal life beyond work(since they’re professional connections.). After this, I had a billion other thoughts of this sort. “why am I still thinking of him” “does this mean I like him” “who thinks that” *replaying the thought over and over* “maybe he likes me” all these situational thoughts. I can’t even ground myself by thinking about love for my bf. “I love him I want him so bad” “no you don’t” “he’s the best” “you don’t really think that” “how will u handle ur life other guys ur relationship ur hectic schedulel” “fuck up” “these thoughts r supposed to be normal” “its just attraction” “attraction for so long? Everytime u see him?” “youre gonna try to downplay the thoughts like u always do” “this is not normal” I just froze there crying till I couldn’t breathe for 45 minutes. Next morning, I woke up thinking its just something that is not important, I love my boyfriend so much I should put my energy here. I was then called in for a meeting. I pictured the guy just being in university and I felt like normal softness towards him, I got pulled. And then after a while I saw his fair through the online meeting I was worried ill think something wrong. Then I heard him talk to a girl and I was worried ill think im jealous and get jealous. Then after avoiding the thought for a while I got the thought, I felt like I was jealous. But at the same time I was so anxious because I didn’t wanna think like this. And after that I saw him again and I pictured me being with him there next to him in a flash and then I got anxiety and I’m here now.

Hey everyone I’ve been doing good lately. I have an ocd therapist and I’m working on myself. Haven’t been doing as many compulsions or checks The last couple days I feel like I lost physical attraction to my wife and my mind says it’s because I’m gay. At this point I’ve been going back and forth on this for years so I’m more accepting but it still freaks me out. Then I noticed a coworker who is define as an attractive guy and thought about what it be like to be gay with him. It didn’t seem horrible but it seemed off somehow. Fast forward I tried gay porn…..again. At first like always it did nothing but I kept like making mental accommodations and trying to physically put myself in the situation. Then all the sudden I ejaculated. Sorry if too graphic. It’s happened before like that but I don’t get why. I feel horrible after it happens too. Anyway I tried straight porn to balance it out and it took forever. Maybe I just need to accept I am gay or not totally straight. I notice attractive guys and girls but I dream about my wife/girls, feel more comfortable thinking about a heterosexual relationship and can’t like get aroused to guys outside of porn. Can anyone relate? What does this mean? I might be seeking reassurance but need help