- Username
- OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Username
- BigGyro09BigGyro09
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Judging from the comments, unfortunately this is a common thing that happens to people, including me. Like one person already said, I found porn when I was only a middle schooler and that lead to pretty awful things. An addiction, warped perspective of overall sexual health, taboo videos, really impulsive decisions with other people my age all the way through to high school. I even get false memories about this same thing. Definitely some of the worst things to happen to me that I can think of but I'm glad I've made the conscious effort to keep it out of my life and basically never go into it again. This stuff fades overtime and you'll eventually be able to forgive yourself slowly
- Username
- OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yeah, I’m trying to stay away from porn too, especially after I saw something horrific on YouTube, but thank you, I’ll try to stay away
- Username
- BigGyro09BigGyro09
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@OCDHaver That makes both of us then. In October 2020 I was still trying to cope with porn and ended up seeing some fucked up shit deep inside YouTube by accident. Never again. I honestly don't need to rely on something like porn and I'm glad I made that decision this year. Definitely try your best, but don't feel bad when you relapse back into it. All that matters is you keep trying and don't give up completely.
- Username
- 🌸🌸
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I did the same thing pretty much, I found porn when I was way to young and was exposed to sexual things so I became addicted to it, even reading fanfics and stuff..I watched and read some disgusting horrible sinful things ..they even made their way into my day dreams and fantasies..I hate it now so much. I even did things I regret ..it makes me feel what I have isn't ocd..that I'm a monster. Your not alone and from what i read .. It sounds like false memory, please ignore it and don't give into any compulsions. Sit with the anxiety and it will fade away over time! :)
- Username
- OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thank you, and I’ve done a lot of bad things as well, but hopefully we can move forward from this
- Username
- OCDpashaOCDpasha
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Watched what I think were similar anime/hentai things that triggered my OCD as well. Unrelated to the Big Mouth thing but still. I doubt what I’m going through is OCD because of it a lot of times. It’s my biggest stumbling block to recovery. I can’t tell you whether you did or didn’t do something for sure (you probably didn’t btw) But what is important is that you’re not alone, and you’re getting treatment. Even if it feels like it isn’t beyond a shadow of a doubt, it really is just OCD. And you’re not what you’re afraid you are. You’ll get through this.
- Username
- OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thank you, I'm just really scared, I also something horrible last night, unintenionally, and had to call the suicide hotline. My mom took my phone away because it serves as a compulsion. I don't know, I'm terrified though, because I don't look at anyone younger than two years and think they're attractive, so sometimes that helps, but then I remember some gross stuff like animated porn I used to watch and get really scared, some say it's because of that whole thing that the more you watch porn, the more hardcore stuff you watch and that again, they're just drawings, but I get terrified, my heart is beating 1,000 miles a minute right now
- Username
- OCDpashaOCDpasha
- Date posted
- 3y ago
First thing you have to do is take a few deep breaths and try to relax. I’m sorry you had to call the suicide hotline, and I hope you and your family will do everything to keep you safe. I’ve been there before and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. And yeah the OCD gives false attractions and false urges as part of it. It’s rough but it can be treated and overcome. And Porn addiction can work that way. And I know it’s not going to be helpful to say things like “it wasn’t anything like the real thing at the end of the day” or “you know it’s wrong and you stopped”, as thats been told to me many times by virtually everyone I know and it hasn’t made the shame and confusion go away. But you have to keep going and getting the help you need, have faith in yourself and in the work, you’ll be able to overcome this. You’re a good person. Try to keep reminding yourself of that.
- Username
- OCDHaver OCDHaver
- Date posted
- 3y ago
The show itself was graphic and I may be making a false memory, but idk, I'm really scared and my heart is pounding
Related posts
- Username
- sunshineandr...
- Date posted
- 1y ago
Internet not being regulated as a teen
Just a heads up this is a little NSFW So I’ve had POCD for a hot minute, since I was 18. When I was 15-17 I can’t remember the age could have been 14 I don’t know. I went on Wattpad and would look for like smutty pictures. I remember I kept going back to this one book because it had a lot of chapters and images. It had a lot of dipper from gravity falls and even one with him and that triangle dude. I feel gross because I kept going back. I do know I didn’t like that it was that character I just liked the fact the images were sexual in nature but as I type this I don’t even know if I liked them but kept looking out of curiosity? I think I’m replaying the memory too much. I don’t wanna ask for reassurance because I know it’ll only add temporary relief but I needed to get this off my chest because I feel like a terrible person. I’ve also seen the Simpsons like all characters that was disturbing. Basically it’s under rule 34 (if it exists there’s p0rn of it) but I was a horny teen/kid on the unregulated internet and I sometimes wish I never had a phone when I was younger. Anyway I feel like a terrible person and just wanna know if I’m a creep or not…
- Username
- savvyp
- Date posted
- 23w ago
POCD (TRIGGER PORN)
It’s 4am and I’m really freaking myself out. So full disclosure…I used to watch Porn and this triggered SO OCD initially. I feel like it’s NOW jumped into POCD. In the past I used to click on vids of women performing sexual acts. (Hence the SO OCD) But now I’m freaking out that I actually finished and enjoyed myself to the vids that maybe said Teen in the title or what not. At the time I didn’t believe that those girls were actually underage because why would that be legal and distributed on Porn hub? Maybe these girls are trying to click bait a weird thing? I assumed Teen meant 18. Now I look back on it and feel gross and that I’m a predator. I would never condone anything like that in real life. I keep questioning myself like “Why the hell did I do that?” “why didn’t I click off the video?” If that person was actually 17 or younger I would freaking lose it. How could I live with myself? How could I ever be a good person?
- Username
- WannaBeANorm...
- Date posted
- 21w ago
It can't be OCD because of my mistakes with porn.
Huge trigger warning related to porn and pedophilia. Please don't read if it makes you uncomfortable. Thank you if you get to read this long post. Something awful happened recently. I was watching porn, I won't say what page because idk if it is allowed, but it is the most famous porn page there is, so you'd think you wouldn't find something so horrifying there. The problem is that one of the automatic pop ups that appeared really terrified me because the girl looked way too young. I'm not sure if she truly was underage, but she looked it, and I can't express how horrifying it is considering if she could have been. I feel like my mind is playing games with me. I can't tell if it was paranoia or reality. My memories are really fuzzy, as I was on a state of shock when I saw it. I remember feeling scared right away and trying to look up how to report it, but the page refreshed on it's own and I never saw the pop up again. I felt so gross for seeing that, and guilty for not reporting it. It was an accident, but I can't help but think that I enjoyed it and that it is my fault for watching porn at all. I am a monster. If this had happened to someone else I wouldn't question it so much, as I know that I didn't look at it on purpose and tried to do the right thing when I saw it. But I already hate myself because years back, when I was 16, I discovered loli. Which is really wrong drawings of young characters. And since then I've been obsessed with the topic and developed pocd. I never looked for those drawings again after that, I dont enjoy them. But I've accidentally found them again on the internet and it's made me feel disgusting and evil; but at least I had the certainty that it wasn't real, until now. I think that this is recent event is further proof of the monster that I already thought I was. After what happened, I immediately contacted a therapist, but tbh, I don't think that I'll ever move on from that. Life isn't looking good right now.
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