Fear scripts, listening on a loop, has really helped me recently. My therapist had me describe my fear in great detail as if it happened, what did I think/feel, hear, see, what did I say, how did the person in my scenario reply… and had me tell it from beginning to end. When I told her the story I was getting so choked up with tears, the words hurt so badly to vocalize. Since I was exhausted, she recorded the story into my phone and read it with feeling. She gave me her written notes, suggested adding to it and record myself telling the story stressing to read it with feeling especially the dialogue. I did. She said to listen to it 30 minutes to hour every day and at least 10 minutes when I’m triggered. It made me sick to my stomach for 3 days, triggering other what ifs the whole time, I was just so, so tired of it, rrrrh! Then on that third night I woke up ruminating for two hours and I remembered what she said about listening to it when triggered but dangit I just didn’t want to listen! Finally I got up, put my headphones on, by the fourth round I was knocked out asleep. It calmed me! For some reason the recording was similar enough to the ruminating that it kinda replaced it and was oddly calming. Very important- at the very end of the recording my therapist and I say “even if all of this happens, I’ll find a way to cope”. It’s empowering and true. We are all survivors!

Just noticed something that helped me today. I was having the realization a lot of my issues stem from me not taking responsibility for my own life, and also not recognizing my own self-limiting beliefs (SLBs) and automatic negative thoughts (ANTs.) In doing this, I learned that the only way forward is confronting my deepest darkest fears head on and associated irrational/self limiting beliefs- and that for years and years, I have simply retreated and run away. One of my deepest darkest fears (one of my obsessions) is rooted in the understandable fear of the worst of humanity, and the 'what if' I was that (like many of us.) I actually can have compassion for myself because it is perfectly okay to be scared of the worst of people, and if something like that is perpetuated throughout pop culture-media- it would make sense to have associated thoughts about it. The fear is that I am a serial killer or have motives of one. And the OCD has caused me to constantly question my motives and actions to no end (how OCD latches on- makes you look for evidence where there is none.) For the longest time, I have been convinced I am one, and need to hide myself from the world, avoid people more than just because of social anxiety, what my main anxiety was back then. I look for signs everywhere- and the OCD latches on to any perceived (not real) evidence that I am one, that people think I am one. When I decided to confront this fear rather than run away like I have for years, it made me realize it is just a fear- it has nothing to do about who I am as a person, despite how strong the OCD tries to convince you otherwise. It is so sad how strong OCD can be, to make so many of us good intending people be convinced that they are something horrible. Anyway, I hope this can help people realize the best way forward is to confront it head on. It's akin to shining a light on the monster and seeing it for what it is - a goofy thing with fake prosthetics for a movie that isn't a monster after all- a sheep in wolfs clothing. It's just you have been running from it so long, your imagination has gotten so detailed about how horrible it is, hearing its fake growls, instead of turning around and blasting it with a spotlight. This is I guess what ERP is about. For me, one of the struggles with ERP and a specific exposure is that the OCD will jump to a different obsession , which then tells me ERP is a waste because Im not confronting the 'most recent' fear. This is faulty thinking though- because the solution is to confront the fear, not the specific thought. By doing that, you learn to not run away and do all the compulsions in your mind. Tl;dr- long winded post about me realizing how I have actually been avoiding the solutions (ERP) and making up reasons to not confront my fears this whole time. I have been running instead of shining a light on the sheep in wolfs clothing.

This one's a "what if" exposure; a way to trace the anxiety spiral and sit with the discomfort it brings, instead of trying to avoid or fix it. Here’s how it works: Start with your anxious thought: 1. “What if A happens?” Then go deeper: “Okay… if A happens, then what?” → “Then B.” 2. And again: “What if B happens?” → “Then C.” 3. Keep going (following the fear, not avoiding it) until you land on the core fear, the real root of the anxiety. It’s usually something sticky, existential, or deeply uncomfortable. 4. Once you’ve found it, stop. Now sit with it (the feeling). Notice how it shows up in your body. Where is the tension? The tightness? The urge to escape, fix, or seek reassurance? And just let it be there. Without trying to solve it. Just you, your body, and the fear; without resistance. This isn’t about fixing the fear. It’s about making room for it. It’s about learning that you can feel the fear and not let it control you.

Hello everyone, I wanted to share something that helped me cope with OCD. I have been in therapy for years and different therapists have recommended I name my OCD like it’s a monster. I always had a hard time doing it. I recently tried a different approach and it’s helped me. I realized this week that my OCD isn’t a monster, it’s a younger/teenage version of me who has been through a lot. She is scared and angry and upset at the world, and when she presents herself within me, I talk to her. I don’t yell and scream at her because she’s already yelling and screaming at me (everyone hates you, this is dirty, etc). Instead I talk to her: “You don’t have to scream, you don’t have to cry, it’s alright, you’re right here and now.” Thought this might help someone. We can get through this!