- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey there👋🏽 I've had similar thought processes before. Look, I think us OCD sufferers are way too hard on ourselves. We have to remember how disabling OCD really is. From what I've read, this is a very complex situation you're having here. But I need you to know that any actions you've made in this situation that you feel were irresponsible.... you shouldn't be so hard on yourself about it. OCD can wear us out mentally and even numb us mentally sometimes. It is an intense disorder to deal with. So please don't be so hard on yourself about this❤❤❤❤ you did the best you could considering how bad OCD effects us
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much :( it does wear me out as you said but I cannot believe I let myself do that. How did you get over the situation? I feel so hopeless
- Date posted
- 3y
Unfortunately I didn't find a way to properly deal with the situation,😔 so I only got over it when my OCD themes switched to something else. But, I have been starting to sit with the intrusive thoughts, especially the disturbing ones. I almost cried while doing it because of the horrid nature of the thoughts. As a fellow OCD sufferer, I would just remind you that your contaminatom OCD is attaching to your mother and boyfriend because you care about them very much😊 so don't believe the bad things OCD is trying to get you to believe about your character
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much❤️ I just feel like I was sure that my mom and I doing the exposure together would make us spread covid (whether this is rational or not but in my mind I probably believed this) but yet I still went outside with her together. In my mind, going with her together after the exposure is pretty sure to contaminate people more but yet I went outside. What was wrong with me?
- Date posted
- 3y
@alittleapple Your OCD just put a lot of pressure on you and you just made the decision you felt was best at the time🙂
- Date posted
- 3y
@Cheetahvionic I cannot take this ocd anymore :( it keeps making me feel like I turned into a bad person but like I could have stopped myself but didn’t and let myself just ruin everything
- Date posted
- 3y
Aww😣 I understand how you feel in all this. Just know that you're not alone. I hope you have a nice night or at least a good night's sleep🙏🏽
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much❤️ you too you’re not alone and you can reach out anytime. I am really hoping my theme changes this is just too much
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
Hi. I am going through something really hard right now, and I could use some insight, especially from others who deal with OCD and morality-based spirals. There was a time during a really emotional conversation with my boyfriend when he said something incredibly painful. He said something like he only felt lust for me but did not feel love anymore. I was completely crushed. It felt like everything I believed about our relationship was ripped out from under me. In that moment, I told him that what he said felt like rape. I want to be really clear. I knew even then that it was not a good or accurate comparison. It was not assault. I was trying to express how emotionally violated and broken I felt, and that word came out. I even labeled it directly, not just compared it, and that is what has been haunting me. I feel like I kept going along with it, not because I wanted to lie or manipulate, but because I felt like if I backed down from it, he would not understand the depth of how hurt I was. He didn’t seem to understand any other way. Later, when we tried to be intimate again, I told him not to touch me. And even though a part of me did want closeness, I still felt like I had to react that way, like I had to follow through with what I had said earlier. I wanted so bad for him to understand the impact of his words. That part is killing me. It makes me feel like I was not being authentic, that I was performing a reaction instead of living it. I feel like I acted like a survivor when I was not one, and I hate myself for that. Now, OCD is eating me alive over it. It keeps telling me I am a liar, a manipulator, and someone who cannot be trusted. And it feels so real. But I also know I was hurting. I was not trying to deceive anyone. I was just overwhelmed, desperate to be understood, and probably influenced by years of invalidation from my family over almost everything. I have talked to my boyfriend about it and apologized. He told me he understands and forgives me. But I cannot forgive myself, and I do not know if what I did is forgivable. Has anyone ever been in a similar place? I feel so so awful this was 3 years ago. Now I feel like I can’t trust any of my emotions. I’m analyzing every reaction, past and present, trying to decide if it was “real enough” or if I was somehow dishonest. It feels like OCD has completely hijacked my sense of self. Please help :(
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- Date posted
- 22w
Hey everyone, I’m going through something that really shook me up and triggered my OCD. Today I was talking to my mom about how people in our family have been talking badly about my cousin, who’s 17 and pregnant. I haven’t told my cousin anything about what they’re saying, because I don’t want to add any stress to her. I’ve honestly tried to protect her from all the drama. But then my mom told me to be careful about what I say to her, because she’s really worried my cousin could have a miscarriage from stress. She said if that happened and I had told my cousin anything, it would be my fault. I think my mom meant it out of concern, like she just wants to protect my cousin—but the way she said it came off as really harsh and it hurt me. Especially because I’ve never said anything to my cousin and I would never want to cause her any stress. Now my OCD is grabbing onto that fear. Even though I haven’t done anything wrong, it’s making me feel like, “What if something happens to the baby and it somehow ends up being your fault?” Logically, I know that doesn’t make sense. But the guilt and anxiety feel so real, and it’s hard to shake.
- Date posted
- 12w
So I have been struggling with the same theme of ocd for 4 months now. My ocd centers around past events/false memories that ocd skews to make seem bad or it twists my thoughts on what my intentions were. this is related to cheating or being weird while I have been in my amazing relationship. I have never cheated on my partner and never will and I believe it is wrong. But my ocd is telling me other wise. I love my partner so very much and I would never want to hurt him but my brain is getting to me. I was getting better. I was trying “maybe I did, maybe I didn’t”, I have been back on meds and in therapy and I stopped confessing random interactions from years/months ago about 1.5 weeks ago and it really helped. But now I woke up this morning and feel the pit in my stomach again. I feel extra critical and like why would you do this? What does this say about you? What was your intention with this? And I’m just stuck mentally reviewing and ruminating on everything you could imagine. I know my personality and I know in the moment maybe I did find them attractive but mainly I was just being nice or funny or even just a good friend, but looking back now I’m like “was it flirting?” “Why did I still snap this person” “why would I even talk to them” and stuff like that. I feel this intense sense of guilt. I have told my partner everything that I keep getting stuck on and he didn’t care, he said he understands or “that’s a little weird but it’s okay” and hasn’t missed a beat. He said eveything I’ve told him is normal and I’ve heard that from my friends too. I just really need help. I don’t know what to do anymore. I am so disappointed because I thought I was gonna be done with this, so why am I still so worried and caught up in this.
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