Brothers and sisters what a beautiful thing it is to trust completely in God and move forward into uncertainty and to trust the therapy He has sent our way knowing that He holds our hand and never let's go leading us towards Him every step we dare take forward! Glory be to God amen.

If you suffer from Christian OCD and feel Jesus hates you and you’re going to hell every few seconds but I keep fighting it because when I pray it says Lucifer and I refuse to pray to him. If I do Jesus will send me to hell. I’m terrified. When does it end. Some Christian’s are so peaceful, I want that.. why.. I feel cursed forever. I have faith in others journey… not mine. I’m stuck like this forever. My mind will never be the same.

So I’m not sure how many/if any of you are Christians, but I’m assuming this can still make sense to some of you. This morning has been rough. I’m constantly thinking, “am I saved? Have I never been saved and I’m tricking myself into thinking I am? When I’m listening to Christian music am I doing for the right reasons? Is it too late for me?”. Things I know the truthful answers to but yet I still think these thoughts. I don’t understand why. Why do I constantly think about these “what if”’s? My heart always feels so heavy and I feel as if I need to talk to God right then and there to make it stop and go away. But then am I talking to the Lord for the wrong reasons? And the cycle repeats. Thankfully, day one of my therapy is tonight and I’m hoping to find at least a little clarity on this stuff. I’ve had OCD for 7 years and I don’t even know how it works. Any advice?

Have any of you ever felt like God is perfectly capable of helping you with your mental health, but just chooses not to for some reason, and so you get angry and frustrated? Bc I feel that way sometimes, but i don’t stay mad for too long. But whenever i’m not frustrated, i’m just feeling hopeless, like why is this going on?