Secret, collectively (she/her)
- Date posted
- 3y ago
SaraaSaraa
- Date posted
- 3y ago
NOOO don't overanalyse! Talking about pure/relationship ocd, (where the compulsion are mostly mental) the most you analyse, check, test, overthink something, the more you try to find an answer, the more you fuel your ocd and intrusive thoughts!! (Rocd and pure ocd speaking) I think people said that we shouldn't trust our gut, because someone we get the "just not right feeling" and consequently we get urge to break up, or take distance etc! Or maybe someone give us an answer in a different tone from usual, and our gut make us feel like "she/he is mad with you! No one likes you!" You know, all this kind of intrusive thoughts! I'm not a professionist, I talk from experience tho!
applehatapplehat
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I had another post but I think it’s too fuzzy and unclear. It’s alright to analyze a bit if it’s something important to you. But get others input as well. Tell the others about your ocd. If it’s a trigger problem and you’re wondering if you should anaylze maybe still talk to someone and ask if you’re overthinking it or if this is a good concern to have. The hardest part is knowing if the issue is worth thinking hard about. The other part is not letting the thoughts get to you big or small. (And sometimes your thoughts will get to you.) when it gets to your head it becomes obsessions. When it’s sowmthing important, you’re allowed to think about it, but the next step is making a decison or letting go. Having someone help you rationalize and make things clear does help too. No one can tell you what is good enough to think about for a long time; it’s about what matters to you most and your boundaries. If someone tries to touch you and you don’t want them to, you don’t have to think about it that’s a no automatically. If someone asks you on a date you’re allowed to think about it, or if you’re deciding on a college. The date is not too hard to think about but sometimes you can ask others for input/ and ask yourself if you want to go. A date doesn’t mean marriage. You can use your intuition in the end and say “hey this worked out let’s do it again” or “no I didn’t have fun let’s not date.” For things that are bigger (in my book) like college. Don’t keep looking for other options if you have a few colleges you enjoy. More options means more overthinking. Ask yourself if it works out for your lifestyle, “does it have my major?” “Is it close to home?” use intuiton and say to your self “yes this school makes sense for me, it’s right where I want and it has my major.” Or “no this doesn’t work for me at all, let’s eliminate that from the choices.” In the end it’s about you. My last advice that seems to help conquer my overthinking is the trick my dad taught me. If I start spiraling about “what if’s” I’d sit down and imagine what I don’t want to happen. Then I ask my self : “why does this upset me?/why is this bad?” And then it will break down your thoughts into why you’re feeling overwhelmed in the first place.
Secret, collectively (she/her)Secret, coll...
- Date posted
- 3y ago
The post I referred to made it sound like "if you're inution says x, definitely don't do x." What do you think
applehatapplehat
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@AnonymouslyMe (see bio) I wouldn’t say that. Because sowmtimes intuition can be right. Just when it comes down to things we know our ocd tricks us with it’s better to talk out these instances. Outside ocd feelings it’s definitely good to use intuition/gut feelings.
applehatapplehat
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@applehat I hope that makes sense I suck at talking. Using your sentence I’ll try to think of examples This is my ocd one “If your intuition says dump your boyfriend because you think there’s lots of other guys out there, don’t dump him yet.” Your ocd could be tricking you. Highlight could. Always get a few perspectives of the situation. If your intuition says “I don’t like milk it gives me a stomach ache” you can look at that glass of milk and be like ok I can trust my better judgement because I know for a fact it hurts my stomach. Ocd will tell you your bad or irrational thoughts are gospel and to do what you need to get rid of the icky feeling. Like dumping your boyfriend when you think about other guys even if you’re happy. The problem with intuiton is that it’s a feeling of instinct and doesn’t necessarily have a conscious reasoning. Sometimes on occasion you’re right about your intuition. Sometimes you feel something maybe you can’t explain with with words or put finger on. A good goal would be to look at your thoughts about situation ask yourself “are my feelings based on solid reasonings or are they more a what if scenario?” If you can say something with certainty then it’s a good call. If you can’t really give a good reason as to why you feel something then it may be ocd sneaking up on you. I’ve probably said the same thing over and over about it sowmtimes being right. If it’s ever in the case of dangerous situations sometimes it is better to be safe than sorry and trust yourself.
anonymous caterpillar 🐛 anonymous ca...
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I’m not sure where you read that, but I suspect that they mean you shouldn’t trust your intuition in regards to your OCD, not that you shouldn’t trust your intuition at all.
applehatapplehat
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yeah that’s what I mean! Your ocd can trick your intuition for triggers. But otherwise it’s ok to trust your own intuition in other cases.
Secret, collectively (she/her)Secret, coll...
- Date posted
- 3y ago
That makes sense. It was a PhD who said to "never" trust instincts so I wondered if that meant also with regards to "my instincts say this is a compulsion and should be stopped"
Related posts
Puffin123456
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Advice?
His so I have a question. Should I feel guilty for things I do like without thinking or naturally. Like for example if I’m around a person I find attractive I will naturally try to be funny or come off as attractive not in a bad way like it just happens I’m not usually aware of it until after it happens.Sometimes I do and say things without an intention it just kinda happens and then My brain after it will Be like oh you did that because of this and that. Or sometimes it’ll tell me I did it for a certain intention that I didn’t do it for, but it’s hard sometimes when I do things without a certain intention so then I can’t tell my intentions and I spiral but sometimes my brain is right and it makes me feel guilty because if I knew that’s was my intention I never would have done it if that makes sense. Is this part of OCD
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 17w ago
"Better safe than sorry."
Does anyone else relate to the above being the go-to mantra when OCD wants to manipulate you? It's a hard one to shake for me personally, if you have any tips for overcoming this particular thought, it'd be much appreciated! The current example: There is a sticky fly trap that hangs from the ceiling above our drying rack. I removed a strainer to strain my pasta and worried it hit the fly trap (even though I have no reason to believe it actually did). At first the voice was saying "better safe than sorry" and I was able to "overcome" it to drain my pasta but now that I have a bowl of pasta sitting in front of me, I can't get myself to eat it. Update: I asked my mom for reassurance and she gave it to me so, now that I'm eating the pasta, I'm worried, what if she was wrong. This is a pretty common version of a spiral for me when it comes to contamination and consumption, it's just very hard to shake the "better safe than sorry" mantra. No reassurance please, just tiprs to get over the "better safe than sorry thought." Thanks in advance for your insight and support!
Hyades
- Date posted
- 6w ago
OCD Teaming Up With A Real Life Bad Experience.. Help?
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
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