Big fight with my husband. I'm a pretty high people pleaser, and I was worried (again) about the lack of comments on my art on Facebook. I was chatting with my husband, wondering why. He blankly said " because noone loves you". It just rung the OCD bell like crazy. I went into tears, my 4 years old daughter asked to apologize, he didn't and stayed silent for 2 hours. And now he's saying he was wrong but it was my fault. I have some self hurting thoughts right now, it's difficult to go through. What a nice way to spend Valentine's Day 🤔

Ur husband sounds like a dick

How exactly was it your fault? I'm sorry for saying this about your husband but that pretty much makes him an asshole. There was literally no reason for this comment and he's obviously not sorry. Blaming it on the victim after bad-mouthing them (despite knowing their condition) is really toxic. I'm sorry this happened to you. If this is a constant occurrence, i suggest you communicate with him and if he still keeps on using the blame card without giving a single fuck about your perspective, it's better to leave this relationship.

It seems like he was wrong and he can’t take responsibility and because of the nature of OCD and the “hyper responsibility” that comes with it wants you to take responsibility because your “OCD” (in quotes because there could be more here) says it’s your fault. And it’s not.

What the hell is wrong with your husband like WTF

He's the cliché of the "man" ; I should stay strong, not have emotions,... And it makes him feel miserable, even if he doesn't want to say it loud

You deserve love, you are loved, precious and you matter. Never let anyone steal your self worth and self love away. People should never make such rude and harsh comments on anyone. We are here to love and support each other not to break others' hearts. Please talk to him in a serious way and ask him what did he mean by saying that. Does he speak to you in this attitude all the time or it was something random? Do you feel loved and supported by your husband?

He is usually nice and doesn't mean to be nasty. But the problem is we cannot have a good conversation about feelings and my health without him going into mutism. I'm going with him at my next appointment with my psychiatrist so I hope it will make things a bit better

Thanks for your support. He is bad at being empathetic and can be easily overwhelmed with his anger. In many points I feel supported and loved by him, but I don't really feel secure sharing my emotions. My psychiatrist suggested we go together to the next appointment so I convinced (with difficulties) my husband to do so. Hope it will make things a little better.

Not being empathetic is no excuse for behavior though. My mom kinda sucks at empathy too but she tries her best to act as she should to others.

Please keep us updated

@naquin0 Sure. I find it very hard to confront harm OCD in this situation, and since it's the holidays here I'm keeping my daughter full time at home. I can sing 🎵under pressure 🎵 now 😂