- Username
- hannie
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m in a partial hospitalization program and have been for a week now. Today I had a panic attack during a group and I asked to speak to a nurse. I told her that I’m afraid that I’m going schizophrenic. She asked why. I told her I’ve been googling symptoms of delusions and things of that nature now they are stuck on loops playing in my head. She laughed and told me “if you really were, you wouldn’t realize it”. Anxiety can cause some serious shit to go wrong in your brain but schizophrenia is not one of them. You can worry yourself into believing you are. She gave me examples of what she’s seen in patients and that isn’t me. I’m trying to reach way down inside because I want to get past this. Thoughts are not reality. I’m trying hard to keep this in the front of my mind. Hope this helps.
The problem is not that you are schizoprenic, the problem is you can not stop worrying about having an illness.
Thank you guys so much for responding. I’m sorry you all have to face this disorder. You guys are all so strong. I’m trying to be too. It’s just so crazy how our minds can convince us that these thoughts are real. It really is the doubting disease. I’m going to work on just letting the thoughts be there and try not to fall into the trap.?
I have HOCD and existencial ocd and I can tell you. All ocd's are the same. They come, they destroy, they stay, they make you worried about every little thing, without an stop. If I was just gay, I will not have these thoughts. I will not think about every possible situation and of course, my sexuality would make me happy and not miserable or chained. If I really did not know who I am I will not worry about losing *myself*. What I mean is, the moment you worry about it, the moment your ocd rises to turn your way of living into a fucking nightmare.
I can’t tell if I’m purposefully thinking about my unwanted thoughts, or if they’re truly intrusive. Could someone help explain the difference? I’m very confused. Also I keep telling myself if I don’t enjoy the thoughts then I’m okay and normal, but the anxiety behind the thoughts don’t stop. I need some clarification stat!!
How do I know that this is OCD or not something else? I really feel like it is just OCD but my mind is so convincing I’m gonna develop schizophrenia or become delusional. I’m so anxious cause I have other themes mixed into this (such as harm OCD) Any tips?
Does anybody else experience delusional intrusive thoughts? I have a very big fear of developing schizophrenia or becoming delusional. And it seems that a lot of my intrusive thoughts are delusional intrusive thoughts that I fight.
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