- Date posted
- 5y ago
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’m in a partial hospitalization program and have been for a week now. Today I had a panic attack during a group and I asked to speak to a nurse. I told her that I’m afraid that I’m going schizophrenic. She asked why. I told her I’ve been googling symptoms of delusions and things of that nature now they are stuck on loops playing in my head. She laughed and told me “if you really were, you wouldn’t realize it”. Anxiety can cause some serious shit to go wrong in your brain but schizophrenia is not one of them. You can worry yourself into believing you are. She gave me examples of what she’s seen in patients and that isn’t me. I’m trying to reach way down inside because I want to get past this. Thoughts are not reality. I’m trying hard to keep this in the front of my mind. Hope this helps.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
The problem is not that you are schizoprenic, the problem is you can not stop worrying about having an illness.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thank you guys so much for responding. I’m sorry you all have to face this disorder. You guys are all so strong. I’m trying to be too. It’s just so crazy how our minds can convince us that these thoughts are real. It really is the doubting disease. I’m going to work on just letting the thoughts be there and try not to fall into the trap.?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I have HOCD and existencial ocd and I can tell you. All ocd's are the same. They come, they destroy, they stay, they make you worried about every little thing, without an stop. If I was just gay, I will not have these thoughts. I will not think about every possible situation and of course, my sexuality would make me happy and not miserable or chained. If I really did not know who I am I will not worry about losing *myself*. What I mean is, the moment you worry about it, the moment your ocd rises to turn your way of living into a fucking nightmare.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Hello! I'm new here and new to OCD. My therapist suggested I might have OCD due to my tendency to ruminate endlessly on doubts and fears. These thoughts are indeed intrusive and I can't seem to stop them. The thing I'm kind of stuck on is that I can't see where the compulsions come in. Unless the thoughts themselves are compulsions. Can anyone relate to this?
- Date posted
- 19w ago
I've gotten diagnosed with OCD and I'm in therapy. But I'm worried that I don't have OCD/that I got misdiagnosed. And recently I'm worried that I've just gotten myself into a habit of thinking of dirty minded or just plain old terrible things after I see/hear certain things because I feel like I need to prove I have OCD or else I'm faking(sometimes this goes away). Or that I'm just mimicking symptoms of ocd to cope with real problems I may have and that im just really deep into denial. I don't know...I'm just so tired. I mean, what if I really am what I think I am and this is my brains only way of coping? I don't even really feel anything towards most of the thoughts anymore either I just know they go against my values and I don't want them. I don't know if that's because I'm so mentally exhausted, I just don't care, or that the thoughts are true and I'm comfortable with them.
- Date posted
- 11w ago
I feel like there’s no way out of this. everyday i’m anxious and depressed from these thoughts. i feel like i have to constantly question if it’s OCD or not. the panic attacks are insane and i freak out. and a compulsion i have is looking eveything up on the internet when im stressing to know that it’s just my OCD and im not in danger. but looking things up add on to my thoughts and i start thinking “what if” actual suidcal people think. do others with this theme whenever they do something like if im taking a picture it’ll be like “yeah you look happy people will wonder what happened when your gone” LIKE i DO NOT want to end my life. or even as simple as cleaning my room, “yup keep it clean so when your family goes through your stuff” then i panic and can’t even do anything. those thoughts distress me so bad. i’ll sit there and think how good my life is or when im having a good day my thoughts will be like “NOPEEE what if your just saying that to convince yourself” it never shuts up and genuinely makes me think i have SI or something. i hope this reaches the right people just to know im not alone. Even when i do get better in the back of my mind it’s always “people who want to are the same a day before too” im genuinely scared and im scared one day im going to just snap and do it because its “too much” do i need to go to a mental hospital! i feel insane.
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