- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Just to clarify, is this more of a role play scenario as in acting out your feads so you can sit with the anxiety or does your therapist want you to break up for real? ROCD isn't a theme of mine (that I know of) so I'm not super familiar with some of the common scenarios that come with it. If its practice then it sounds similar to script writing exercises for harm ocd. If its not practice that sounds weird?
Thanks for this question- first I would want you to clarify with the ERP therapist that this is indeed what they meant. I am wondering if this was meant as a imaginal exposure or if somehow the communication was not good- you may practice it on your own but not in front of the boyfriend so that you experience the anxiety associated with this- without actually breaking up, but I would consult with your therapist and work together to come up with the most effective ERP for your situation. Hope this helps some.
it does! she actually wants me to call and break up with him. that feels kind of extreme to me.
Nope, but saying it/writing it out over and over again, yes.
did that help you?
@taylersmith One of many exercises but yes.
@Nica okay. i ask because i don’t know how i feel about my therapist wanting me to break up with my boyfriend like that feels weird to me.
@taylersmith I am not doing ERP right now, but even before I learned about rocd, I tried breaking up with my partner and literally a couple of hours later it felt wrong. The moment I hang up the phone (we are long distance) I regretted it so bad. I guess that's how I knew
@SkyeV yes i understand that completely because i asked my bf for a break and then i regretted it, just the idea of this makes me uncomfortable
@taylersmith They’re not telling you to break up with your boyfriend. It’s role playing.
@Nica she wants me to physically call him and do it. she said sometimes he will be aware that it’s going to happen and sometimes he won’t be.
@taylersmith Still sounds like role playing to me 🤷🏻♀️ Tell him about the homework from your therapist.
Hey guys! My boyfriend has said recently that he doesn't know if he's strong enough to continue with our relationship because of my OCD. He wants to see me overcome my symptoms and learn to live a healthy life with OCD, but my anxieties and obsessions are starting to really affect his life. I understand his reasoning, it's hard to see someone you care about struggle with OCD, especially when it starts to affect you too. I'm asking for tips to deal with my compulsions in the relationship. I HAVE to know the answer to things and sometimes that leads into arguments because even with apologies and discussions I can't let things go, even if they genuinely don't matter or are miniscule issues we have. It's a healthy relationship otherwise but I feel horrible because it's impacting him so negatively, that's the absolute last thing I want to happen. I care for him deeply and he cares for me too, so I don't want my OCD to be a reason we break up but I fear it's headed in that direction. I'm starting therapy soon, but until then what are some things I can do to stop my ROCD from impacting him? I know sitting in the guilt and anxiety of not completing my obsessions will help, but I'm wondering if there are other things I can do to maybe remedy some of the damage already done.
Hi - I’ve made a series of posts about my situation over the past few weeks. My bf asked to take a break from our relationship through text the first week of April. We haven’t spoken since. There’s a lot of outward details to this but I’ll try to keep it as simple as possible. My ocd is telling me the worst of the worst. He left me with full uncertainty because he didn’t give me a reason, and his decision felt like it happened overnight and I’m still so confused. He’s never been in a relationship as serious as this before. I’m incredibly hurt and angry, and my emotions get worse on Saturday and Friday nights because that’s when his frat parties happen. I do ERP phrases but my stomach hurts and it’s churning so bad. I deactivated/deleted social media apps for now because it’s too much. I just wish this physical feeling would stop. Does anyone have tips?
I read about ERP and have seen information about it on here. One of the goals is to say, "maybe I am this or that...ect." That terrified me. The thoughts and images that go in my head are disturbing and upsetting. I don't want to even think about saying, "maybe this or that." It's devasting to have these thoughts and question why you're having these thoughts. Doesn't the "maybe" make it worse? The one thing that helps me is that is to remind myself that these are just thoughts and I know I'm not a monster, even if I feel like one. Is ERP not for everyone? Has anyone else had a problem with the techniques used in this kind of therapy? I had cognitive therapy for years with an OCD specialist and that seemed to help a lot. Writing out the worst case scenarios would make me suicidal. Im having a difficult time not obsessing over the "maybe" after intrusive thoughts now. It doesn't make it better.
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