Everyday this is starting to feel less and less like ocd. I constantly feel anxious. So here’s how it goes Every single girl I see I worry “what if I am attracted to them” If I am not attracted to every guy i see I feel guilty I can’t imagine myself with a guy anymore Can’t imagine myself with a girl either (but for some reason it’s telling me I would love that) I feel sick all the time I constantly feel anxious I have so many what if questions I worry that this may have been me all along I was just unknowingly suppressing it I worry that all my past crushes weren’t real I feel anxious towards any girl now I feel like I am never going to love a guy again I feel like my case is different, that mine is real I can’t tell whether I feel aroused or disgusted by the thoughts The thoughts don’t leave my head and I’m constantly anxious. I am not attracted to women I am not attracted to men anymore This sparked up all of the sudden I can’t tell whether I actually want to be with a women I can’t imagine my future without the thoughts coming I feel different than anyone else That fact that I am even having the thoughts makes me anxious I can’t think a girl is pretty without immediately thinking what if I am attracted to them For some reason I am convinced I am a lesbian all of the sudden Can’t imagine myself with a guy anymore. Can’t tell if I’m in the closet Feel so anxious Does this sound in any way like ocd?

hey! for a while ive seen you posting about your worries, and each time you describe what must feel like youre holding onto a branch and your fingers are slipping away one by one. i know the feeling, its horrible. like your worst nightmare is coming closer to being reality, all the time. but i can assure you, youre actually at the exact same place, and youve been the entire time. hell, when i look at what ive written down about a year ago about my worries, they havent changed one bit. its the same. im not going anywhere, nothing has changed. and the same goes for you. youre safe

oh and no, wouldnt say i have hocd but have definitely had the thoughts, im just not as bothered by them in comparison to my other intrusive thoughts. i too am a man addict, so getting those “wait hold up what if im secretly a lesbian” and yes, they bother me, but i have so many other thoughts that feel more urgent to me, so i barely have time to give a shit

Everything you describe is OCD. I know it’s scary and it feels so real but it’s not real.

Just take a deep breath, and try to live with uncertainty of it all.. I HOPE THIS DOES NOT TRIGGER YOU BECAUSE IT HELPS ME — but I always say when these thoughts come up ( which we have VERY similar thoughts and I suffer from hocd I think ) I always say “yeah that could mean I’m gay, who’s knows!” The less meaning you give your thoughts the less feelings and anxiety you will associate with them. Could you be gay? Hell anyone COULD be, but just because you can doesn’t mean you are. You see?? There is so much uncertainty and that’s okay! To fight this you have to be okay with the uncertainty.

Oh I am bi so I cant give you any advice sorry

Why not? Please did you relate to any of these things when you stated figuring it out?

Nah because i wasnt worryin about it If it is bothering you then it is OCD

wouldnt say im bi or a lesbian, but whenever i see someone hot, girl or boy, i’ll admire their beauty. not necessarily in a sexual way, just going “damn! you’ve been blessed!”

if it was an actual crush your thoughts wouldnt be so worrisome, all “oh no what is this, what if its a real crush” and all that. if it were a real crush you’d be drooling all over her and very much enjoying thinkinh about it and gladly letting it exist in your mind all day. if your facial expression goes “argh!” everytime you get a thought about it, its fear, not infatuatiob

i get it. i can obsess a little over other girls beauty, but thats because i wish i had that kind of beauty too

I can’t even hear people talk about their boyfriends because it triggers the thought “why if I never get one. What if I secretly don’t want one”

It even feels as if I shouldn’t label it as ocd because mine is real

I feel so anxious i can’t fall asleep. It’s 5 am

Do you have hocd too? I just feel so anxious right now I don’t know what to do

It just doesn’t feel like ocd anymore. I know I don’t want to be with women (or at least I think I do) but somehow I am convinced I am gay

oh yes i know! but youve expressed these same worries for some time now. you feel like youre being pushed down the lesbian lane, but actually youre standing in one spot, and have been the whole time. ocd puts lies in your head, and will find any way to convince you that its not ocd, youre in denial, youre the case that uses ocd as some kind of mask to cover up some unacceptable truth. my ocd does EXACTLY the same, just with different themes.

I was never boy crazy tho. It’s like all of the sudden I know I am not attracted to women, i just can’t get the thoughts out of my head.

Oh, thank you. Makes me feel better. So I want to know your experience how you figured it out if that’s ok with you?

Oh I just looked at a dude and thought wow he is preety hot and then I saw a girl later that day and thought hmm she is pretty hot to and then I put 2 and 2 together and then I knew I was bi

Thats being bi? I’ve always thought girls were pretty. Oh my god oh my god. Anxiety is coming back.

Yeah I like them in a sexual way

I don’t know if I like them in a sexual way. I mean I am still disgusted by penises. But I can’t stop worrying about whether I like this girl. I mean she is pretty, and a part of me knows I don’t. But the other one just can’t stop obsessing about her and “how do you know it’s not a crush, you don’t know how it would feel like to have a crush on a girl” and it’s just so frustrating. It’s like it feels like i can’t label myself as straight anymore. I don’t know. I hate this

I guess It’s more admiration then. I mean, she has a small nose and big eyes. Which I’ve always wanted. It’s just admiration can come so close to attraction sometimes it’s very confusing. Agh, I am so worried