hii, i have tocd and i want to start doing erp, and those things to get better hahah 🥹 but i really don’t know what to expose myself to? do you have any ideas? how do y’all expose yourselves? i really want to get better, im trying non engagement responses but sometimes they don’t really work:( any ideas?
What’s been helping me is go to situations that trigger your ocd and anxiety and then don’t run away from it just stay there and tell your ocd that Your not gonna run away just because your scared it could be holding conversations with the same sex it could be complimenting ppl or going to a all girl place
The reason why ocd feels so real is because of the anxiety it brings people like us with ocd we wired are Brains to be scared of certain thoughts because it goes against are morals or beliefs and some days are better than others
What really helped me is picture urself being the captain of a ship and your trying to get to shore(home) and you have ups and down trying to get to shore you have demons(ocd) saying things that your scared of so u could turn around and the demons might get louder when ur getting closer to sometimes it gets harder because ocd wants u to turn around and wants to me In control again
Be *
Now , my anxiety is almost gone.......but, the thoughts r not gone,& the thoughts feel I will like them or liking them If I don't try to stop them ( It is like someone inside my brain laughing saying ayi u liked the thoughts didn't u now ur attempting to stop cuz ur r in denail).......but , when I try not to stop them, the thoughts slowly go away ,but leaving a doubt of did I really like the thoughts or not.......now my question is should I ignore it and move on?......some times I can't ignore it since it is associated with groinal responses & thoughts that r inturn associated with groinal responses which r same as real arousals & at that movement ur convinced that ur wat u don't want to be.....and u cry for hours
@Say101 U can’t agree with the thoughts ur agreeing with ocd and ur giving yourself reassurance which is not good instead tell yourself maybe,maybe not like when u find a guy attractive say maybe I do like guys maybe I don’t same when u find a girl attractive even if your like damn I would date her u can’t tell yourself 100% u like girls or boys because ocd will fight back and make u doubt again
@Anonymous Ya that is exactly what is happening....... Ocd is tricky me when I try to trick ocd........wen I get a thought of liking a man I push that thought further to do erp and say ya I like it earlier I used to get the opposite effect automatically and I would be ya it is working....but I realised I am using it as a compulsion cuz now am am not feeling the opposite instead my mind is saying ur feeling the same feeling u wat to feel with the girl (although during the thought also I feel it is fake but while I feel it it gives me another feeling to convince me that it is true.....at this point I make a sad face automatically).......and now when I deliberately switch to having that feelings with a woman the thoughts say u don't like it and I start crying...........I think I need to stop this .....thank u very much.......did u recover fully
@Say101 I’m in the process of recovering I’m half way its been getting a lot better because of erp and with ocd there is a lot of ups and downs but u have to keep going
I had just posted a summary of ERP for a group member, and I thought it might be useful for everybody. Here it is below (with a little extra added)…. ERP therapy is researched-based. Most other therapies don’t work. There have been people who have been literally stuck in their houses (from their OCD) who gained their lives back through ERP therapy. NOCD does ERP therapy exclusively. You can find it in other places too, but you have to ask around. There are two tenants of ERP therapy: The first one has to do with the repetitive thoughts inside our heads. These thoughts are actually defined as “obsessions”. You are not supposed to do anything with the obsessions. You are supposed to let them run through your head freely, without trying to fix them or stop them. Imagine a tree planted by a river. The leaves fall off and float down the river. You can see the leaves falling, but you don’t try to stop them or pick them up. You don’t try to fix them. You just let them float away. This is really important to do with your obsessive thoughts. The more you try to fight them off, the worse they get. I used to have blasphemous sentences running in my head 24/7. I felt like I had to put a “not” next to each sentence in order to “fix” it. But this just took hours of my time every day, and it was very scary, because I was worried that if I messed up, that I would go to hell. It was very freeing to learn later that I could just let those sentences run freely through my head without trying to fix them. The second part of ERP therapy is all about “denying your compulsions.” Every time OCD tells you that if you don’t do things a certain way that something really bad will happen, that is a compulsion. Once you recognize what your compulsions are, ERP therapy will have you practice stopping doing all of those things. For some people, that will mean stopping washing their hands or touching lights switches or, in my case, putting “fixing” words in their head. Compulsions are safety behaviors. During ERP therapy, you will practice stopping engaging with safety behaviors. All this is very hard to do and scary, so during therapy you will be given tools to help you deal with the fear. Often ERP therapy will take people from being non-functional to functional. I highly recommend it. ————————————————- PITFALL #1: After you have been doing ERP for a while and become somewhat successful, the OCD will try subtle little tricks to bring you down again. The first one is to tell you that your thoughts are REAL and not OCD, and therefore you can’t apply ERP therapy. Don’t fall for this trick! All thoughts are just thoughts. They are all meaningless. Don’t try to figure out what is real and what is OCD. Just treat all thoughts with ERP therapy. PITFALL #2: The second pitfall is that OCD will tell you that you can’t move forward unless you have absolute certainty that you will be safe. Hate to tell you this, folks, but there is no certainty in life. You will never know for SURE that you or your loved ones will be “safe” from the OCD rules. Therefore, you have to move forward in the uncertainty. It’s hard, but it gets easier with time and practice. We got this, guys !!!!!!
One problem - Various themes This is my first post. I had a relapse a few months ago. Life was amazing and then boom, I got triggered by something and started spiralling about my sexuality (having finally been at peace for two years, entered a healthy new relationship and come out of the closet as an older women). How do you, when you're not triggered practice ERP? I'm able to try and accept the thoughts every time I see a man. What should I be doing when I don't encounter these triggers. I was to say as well that I also am starting to get real event OCD about some of the sexual things I did in the past when I was married and in an unhealthy toxic relationship with my ex husband. I am shamed and disgusted and I'm working on it but there's a certain subsection of the LGBTQ community that trigger these thoughts, groinals and thing for me... I feel like I'm beginning to realise I need to maybe be a little more active in my recovery instead of waiting for triggers... But I don't know how
Anyone have any tips on not making ERP a compulsion? I find myself sometimes wanting to do exposures in order to make myself feel better (feel my anxiety go down and feel relief). 😅
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