How to respond to rumination?

Hey y’all, I have had a few stressful interactions at work with someone and I can’t stop thinking about what I wish I had said or “should” have said. It’s making me sick, and I hate the idea of going back and being around this person. It’s also making me question if I’m any good in my career in general. I know ruminating can be a compulsion, but idk how to stop. I’ve talked to a friend and prayed about it but I just want it to go away. Thanks ✨

Username: redmuse22redmuse22

Date posted: 2y ago

Ymmv but this tip from my therapist has helped with the severity of my ruminating. 1. Get better awareness. You've acknowledged you're ruminating. Thats fantastic. We can't work on it if we don't know that we're doing it. 2. Ask yourself, do I want to keep thinking about it; does this solve the problem; is this making me happy? 3. If any of the answes are NO, acknowledge that you're no longer going to engage with this thought and find something else to do. It's not perfect, but it does make me feel less sucked into that spiral of thinking about the topic over and over. I actually write it out in a journal but thats not a requirement for the excercise.

Username: _MO_MO

Date posted: 2y ago

@redmuse22 Wow I love that a lot. What do you say to them when the thoughts creep back even after that?

Username: _MO_MO

Date posted: 2y ago

@redmuse22 I’m going to try this!!

Username: redmuse22redmuse22

Date posted: 2y ago

@_MKO I do my best to remind myself that I already decided to not ruminate on the topic and then think "I'd rather be thinking about dinner plans/how comfortable this couch I'm sitting in is/I'm going to make a snack" etc. I am trying to practice being more*present* so the thought will vary depending on the situation. I'll admit sometimes I still end up stuck, but I also try to give myself grace and remember that its going to take time to learn this new habit!

Username: laughingslothlaughingsloth

Date posted: 2y ago

I'm terrible with ruminating also. I try to remind myself that whether it happened 10 min ago or 1000 years ago, it's all in the past so I have to let it go. I also try to remind myself that since I try to eat healthy and be "green" in terms of avoiding chemicals and stuff, I need to also keep a healthy mind and not let toxic thoughts and obsessive thinking poison my head. It doesn't always work but sometimes it can snap me out of it if I'm really lost in thought.

Username: laughingslothlaughingsloth

Date posted: 2y ago

I think by apologizing you're feeding into the ocd. If your intentions weren't malicious in what you were saying you have nothing to apologize for. If you say sorry you're wanting to feel better and to cleanse yourself from the obsessive thinking over it and I think that's giving in to the ocd. (In my opinion/what my therapist says).

Username: FlyandteachFlyandteach

Date posted: 2y ago

@_MKO check out the book Brain Lock. It changed my world on intrusive thoughts. It lays out a simple four step solution. Hope that helps!!

Username: Keith26Keith26

Date posted: 2y ago

Have you considered going back and apologizing for your contribution to the interaction. Humility, packaged correctly, can be very liberating, and unexpected perhaps by the other.

Username: _MO_MO

Date posted: 2y ago

Thank you guys so much for the ideas and encouragement- I appreciate it so much 💚

Username: Clockwork

Date posted: 2y ago

Recently

Theres been a recent situation thats been eating at my mind, it was 3 days ago i got a really nasty and worrying intrusive thought and at the time i couldnt help withdrawing and ruminating over it. But suddenly i cant stop thinking about it and its making things so hard because i dont want to. But then i start to question why i keep thinking about it and why it wont leave my head. I cant eat or focus on anything else im so scared right now. How do i let it pass, how can i let this kind of thought go or not pass judgement on it. It seems so impossible

Username: PurpleLotus

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w ago

Health Issues and Anxiety/OCD

I’ve been struggling a lot recently with my anxiety and ruminating about a health issue that I’m reminded almost constantly about. Has anyone dealt with this type of thing and if so how did you manage? I’m used to more intrusive thoughts and “pure” OCD but this is different. 😩

Username: 21379

Date posted: 39w ago

Moral OCD/ Losing Relationships

does anyone have any tips on managing and controlling this? especially if you have said questionable things in the past or as a kid. A long 13 yr friendship of mine is ending and the ex friend really despises me.I can’t help but obsess and ruminate over what I could have possible done wrong even though they’re the one who said hateful things to me. I can’t help but wonder about all past friendships and ex friendships and whether it’s tied to me being a good/bad person. Does anyone have any advice on managing this? I try to reflect on different friendships and why it ended but still end up ruminating on my morality and self. Thank you ❤️

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How to respond to rumination?

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