Does anyone else struggle with this and how do you overcome it? - I have obsessions and command intrusive thoughts/ intrusive urges of googling things that will traumatize me. E.g googling violent acts, reading disturbing articles. These thoughts STICK to my brain and I really don’t know how to let go of them? I also don’t know IF I should go through with them to show my brain not to be scared?
Hi there, I go through the same thing re compulsive googling! I just want to say that this is a compulsion and you should stop doing it - all it does it just causes distress for the both of us. However, I suggest you talk with your psychologist or someone that can help you with your OCD in order to find out what you should actually do. Just letting you know that you are not alone!
@camalia Hey there, thanks so much for you’re reply. To clarify, do you also get compulsions to Google disturbing things? Or obsessions to find our more about something you find scary/disturbing? My therapist told me not to look things up as they seem to be a form of trying to re traumatize myself.
I can say that I have seen this many times in people with OCD- it can fall under a need-to-know/just-right theme- I must know or feel like I know enough. It sounds like this is a compulsion and therefor I would recommend that you do not look these things up. You sit with the urges and the discomfort and allow them to pass on their own. Have you done ERP? I also recommend that.
@NOCD Therapist - Stacy Q. Thank you so much for this! This definitely brings a lot of clarity. I am currently going regular therapy with my regular therapist and it seems my OCD flares up when we uncover trauma together. I will definitely think about ERP :) thank you
Yes, I struggle with this too. Keep wondering why would I want to read disturbing articles and / or google that kind of stuff, but it feels urgent /imperative to know - like somehow it doesn’t feel complete unless I understand it all? Ugh. It’s distressing. It’s helpful to know to treat this like a compulsion. Thanks for sharing your experience.
@hopeful for hygge Hey I’m happy to and am comforted knowing I’m not the only one. It’s one of the most distressing things ever and I’ve had one obsession for a week now thats been bothering me so much, I guess I have to work on focusing on other things. Definitely feels like I need to expose myself to these things to be a stronger person which is so counter productive
I struggled with this a lot for the last month but now I have barely googled in 2 weeks and feel like I’m getting better! Just remember that the googling is for reassurance Ans seeking a. Solution to the uncertainty you’re feeling. And things you see might help but also make things worse and just make you stuck in the OCD Loop in your brain. Try really hard to just observe the anxiety and feel it, however scary and heinous it may seem and recognize that it’s OCD (even if it is real event- ocd blows it WAYYY out of proportion). Observe the thoughts and don’t give them the time of day. Over time it really helped me
I think if you go through with it it's not going to show you not to be scared. It's going to show you that you should be very scared. You do not want to be involved with pure evil and torture and crimes against humanity.
I need advice for intrusive thoughts. I used to feel like I could handle them. They weren’t nearly as bad as the things that related to my actual life. But now, I’m suffering. I haven’t had a sexual experience in over a year that didn’t involve constant intrusive thoughts. Most are somehow related to kids and I keep chasing off the thoughts but it’s so bad. I know you’re supposed to ignore them but I don’t know how I can just ignore that and continue what I’m doing. But they’re coming on stronger. I had one earlier I could not get rid of just as things finished so the thought came on strongly just before my orgasm hit and now I feel absolutely disgusting. I hated the thought and I know it’s not me and it was not enjoyable but it still feels like I was getting off to it. I feel sick. I’m so fucking tired of these thoughts. They’re in my every day life too and it’s all the time. I just want it to stop but ignoring it feels so wrong. What should I do?
At the beginning of this year, I experienced false memories for the first time about watching bad stuff online, which I have never done in my life. I then turned to hours upon hours of googling and researching about it and reading articles about it. I'd sometimes google the same articles or topics multiple times a day. I then also remembered that I watched a clip once from Big Mouth (not knowing they were teens at the time). I became so afraid that I was being watched by the authorities or my ISP simply for doing research that I impulsively deleted my Google activity and became extremely paranoid that I was a bad person and a criminal, even though I'd never ever had these types of thoughts before. Then felt bad afterwards because I was like omg what if i am bad because what if it seems like I'm trying to hide a crime. I just really hate myself rn. I know we shouldn't ask for reassurance, but I'm more just pondering this, does this make me a bad person? Is there anyone else who has experienced something similar? Does this mean I still have OCD? or am I truly just only worried about how other people see me? Even while typing this, I'm asking myself, what does this all mean.
I have intrusive thoughts about pornography with family, friends or even strangers. I really tried to block them out but it seems they always get triggered.l feel extreme guilt and this massive pit in my stomatach that is just there 24/7 and it WONT GO AWAY! I know this may sound weird but my mum knows about this as she noticed something was wrong, but every time I get a thought I always feel the need to tell her i keep thinking that I have done something wrong and that my guilt will go away if i tell BUT IT DOESN’T It just gets worse and another thing pop in and another. ITS A NEVER ENDING CYCLE and it seems like I just can’t break free. What do I do? Anyone who has also gone through this how did you recover and get your life back?
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