Please help - ROCD after night of drinking

Can someone please help with advice? I went out drinking with friends on Saturday and remember having a great time. My friend is single so we try to be her wing woman and talk to guys for her etc. Anyways, I’m pretty sure I remember the entire night. I remember all the Major things that happened and how we got home, even up until I fell asleep. What’s giving me anxiety is how quickly time just went by while we were at the bar and a sudden thought of “what if I did something and don’t remember?” I asked my friend for reassurance, she said we were with each other the entire time and never left each other’s side and only talked to one group of guys (who were total jerks) so we walked away (which I remember). I’m not even sure that any of part of my night is technically blurry, I think it’s just how quickly time passed and my mind trying to find something to be wrong. My major OCD theme is cheating OCD and because I went out with my friends without my boyfriend, my anxiety is awful. The guilt is eating me alive yet I don’t think I have anything to be guilty for? I keep replaying the night over and over again in my mind.

LivingInMyHead

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

This happens to me all the time!!! 🙁 It sucks, I’m so sorry you are also experiencing this. My main theme is cheating ocd too and anytime I’m out with friends/coworkers without my fiancé my ocd just attacks me (especially if I’ve been drinking).

Anonymous39826

Date posted: 2y

@LivingInMyHead I’m sorry you experience this as well!! It’s awful. It makes me want to confess to my boyfriend I’m feeling really anxious about it even if I don’t have an exact reason to be anxious. My friend even told me it was 100% a girls night and absolutely nothing inappropriate happened - don’t know why my mind can’t just let it be

LivingInMyHead

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y

@fall.lover I can totally relate, the urge to confess to your significant other or friends is so real!! It’s definitely a compulsion and won’t help though. I’m currently going through an experience right now with false memory ocd. My therapist says to just lean into the uncomfortable and anxious feelings. Kick back ocd with “Okay, yep, maybe I got drunk and was inappropriate, guess I’ll never know” You can do this!! ❤️

Anonymous39826

Date posted: 2y

I will add I purposely chose to still go out despite my OCD because I didn’t want to avoid going to the bar and drinking - I even monitored what I was drinking and how much. I think the fear is more “am I sure I remembered everything?” And the what ifs / what could’ve happened. I was drunk but I wasn’t blackout.

Anonymous

Date posted: 2y

Hey Fall.Lover, First off, I'm sorry that you are feeling that way. I can really relate to your post. After a night of drinking I've had these same kind of intrusive thoughts a lot over the years, especially around "what if i did something and don't remember." And then, as you said, thinking about the evening over and over and over and over until my head is spinning to convince myself nothing happened that I should be worried about. You asked your friend and she said you didn't do anything, so we know there is nothing to worry about. However, it does sound like there is an opportunity to work on this with someone. I wonder if there is some ERP practice that you could do around this kind of thing? And lastly, congratulations on going out and having fun with your friend instead of avoiding these situations. Sending you a hug and wishing you all the best, form someone who can really relate to what you are feeling right now.

Anonymous39826

Date posted: 2y

@Anonymous Thank you for the kind words, it means a lot. I’m also sorry you’ve experienced this as well - it takes something so innocent and turns it evil :( do you have suggestions for ERP exposures for this?

.Anonymous

Date posted: 17w

ROCD/False Memory

I suffer with a constant worry of what if I’ve cheated. You name it I’ve thought I’ve done it. I’m quite flirty at nature and also insecure. Sometimes hand in hand I don’t think they balance each other out as the constant need for attention to validate myself can backfire. Although I have the best partner ever and she makes me feel nothing less than beautiful I still crave validation from others. That being said someone I used to work with left over half a year ago and when they worked at my current place of work we were very close. Text everyday, phone calls you name it. However looking back I was extra flirty as I wanted him to fancy me. I wanted the power to turn him down to make myself feel better. Awful I know. Now all I can think about is what if I’ve done something. What if I kissed him. What if I’ve slept with him etc. I’ve kept our whole conversations from the minute I got his personal number. I constantly search key words to see if my intrusive thoughts are real. I can except the uncertainty my therapist tells me about as if I have done the worst and cheated I would loose my partner and our 10 year relationship. I love her so much she is my life but I can’t stop thinking what if I’ve cheated. Does anyone else suffer with the same theme? If so how do you cope?

purpleturtle730

Date posted: 17w

rocd

has anyone experienced this or have any advice on what to do. okay so my senior prom is today and i’m in a long distance relationship so im going alone with friends and there’s an after party at someone’s house and it’s just your basic high school party with drinking and everything and ive never been to one but i wanna go with my female friends (im also a girl btw) but i have an rocd fear of cheating or something if i go. ive only ever gotten drunk once and all i was thinking abt was my boyfriend so i don’t understand the cheating “because you were drunk” thing. if i go to this party i do wanna drink a little but im just scared cause im overthinking that something will happen even though i would never do that. i haven’t asked my boyfriend about it yet as he’s at work but i am just not sure what to do.

Relationship OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 15w

Relationship OCD- fear of cheating

I have this deep fear I’ll accidentally cheat on my long term partner. This fear was initially triggered a couple years ago after being at a bar with my friends where I enjoyed the attention of being flirted with by a stranger. Because of my enjoyment of receiving verbal attention, I began spiraling about what if I accidentally cheat. Since then I have made multiple confessions to my partner to seek reassurance, replayed events over and over in my head, spent hours googling/looking at reddit threads, and now I dread “bar like” situations where I know my partner won’t be around. Today I was triggered and have wasted about 4-5 hours of my day ruminating. Does anyone else with relationship ocd struggle with this fear and have any tips?

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Please help - ROCD after night of drinking

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