- Date posted
- 2y
At a temp job
I’m temping right now, which is good because I don’t feel pressure. But today, I was asked if I was interested In permanent position. Boy my OCD just shot up.
I’m temping right now, which is good because I don’t feel pressure. But today, I was asked if I was interested In permanent position. Boy my OCD just shot up.
If you find it easier temping keep doing it. Just say you appreciate the offer but enjoy the flexibility temping offers which is the truth! - absolutely nothing wrong with that. You’ll get better doing longer term positions as you learn to manage your OCD so don’t be too hard on yourself ❤️
Yes. I want to take it if offered though. Im thinking it over, checking out what it all entails. Ordering food, supplies, doing mail and close commute. Good pay. Argh
@Anonymous Work it all out and maybe speak to your therapist. Look at what health benefits they offer too.
That sounds like a really cool opportunity, I get why you don’t want to pass it up! Are you hesitant to accept because OCD in general makes it hard to focus on work or is a higher position the reason for your OCD by putting you under pressure? If it’s the first maybe you could talk about flexible time off with your company. When OCD gets bad you can take breaks at work or a day off. If it’s the pressure maybe bring it up with your boss and tell them you’re interested but need a while. It doesn’t guarantee you a spot but they might be flexible and understand it puts you under pressure and save you a position. If you miss out on this because of OCD don’t put yourself down. Your mental health is way more important than a position. However, I understand it hurts to miss out on things because of mental illness and wish you the best of luck!
I guess it’s a trigger for me. All my past jobs where I was over run with obsessions and doing rituals and sweating, heart rate up, shaking, “they are looking at me”. I wish they would ask me later when I’ve had more exposure therapy. Only 1 month of exposure. Ugh
OCD in general makes it hard. Yes. And since it’s reception it wouldn’t be easy to break away. Well I sort of hope they pick someone else and take the pressure from me making a choice. It’s terrible having OCD. I know I can do all the tasks, it’s just I always think people are looking at me funny and I can’t concentrate. I get so my breathing is off and I’m all tensed up. Thank you all for your input.
Remember that OCD often latches onto good change as much as bad change, and it makes decision-making so difficult. Really try to fight your OCD and make the decisions based on what you want (not what your OCD wants) and is healthy for you. I know that’s SUPER DIFFICULT. Just want to let you know I’m rooting for you and am proud of you.
Love your comment. I’d be giving in to it if I let it win, huh? I will sit with that and see how this plays out. Thanks❤️
I’m so glad everybody has a comfortable job where they can pay for therapy. But I’ve realized my ocd has gotten worse at the job I’m currently at and I don’t want to quit because the job market is never hiring and I always have bills to pay like every freaking week on top of that I’m still in college. I think being stressed is making my ocd worse.
OCD doesn't take a break just because you have work to do. What are some ways that OCD has popped up for you at your work?
Often times I find myself spiraling out in the morning about all sorts of things. When I try and catch myself and figure out what I am obsessing over it’s like it goes away. I haven’t moved. I have been sitting frozen on the floor because I can’t go to work because I am behind on work and I hate being late and I hate being messy but I am frequently late and my room is cluttered and full of stuff. I want to be good and move and go to work but I don’t know what is coming today and I hate my job so I know I will get bored and when I have nothing to keep me busy and engaged I like start thinking and taking an inventory of what is going on and then I will feel a sensation and what is the sensation? How did it happen? And I know that I will pick up the bad emotions in the office and get contaminated, I was really worried about things like this as a kid too I cried because I had to touch dirt in kindergarten. I know I am this way and I have been this way for a while but at the same time I think I might just be normal and like I don’t know why I get stuck in thinking like this. Then I begin to doubt that OCD is real because everyone has a brain with wiring and everyone gets stuck in thought sometimes. I feel disabled from whatever this is because I am stuck. I literally cannot move because I don’t know what’s wrong and I know I have to go to work even though I feel like every moment I spend there is making everything worse because other people are so stressed and I get it from them. And I don’t feel ready because I just feel off and something is wrong and I just don’t know what to do because if it’s OCD or not OCD everything anyone knows about me is coming from me and I worry that I am often masking all the thinking I’m doing because thinking all the time is rude and inconsiderate and inconvenient for those around me, but I can’t stop. I just don’t feel right, right now - and I want to know WHY?? Why is everything off all the time? How do I even know that I am not making up the experience of OCD in my head to cover up something really wrong with me and now I am taking on the symptoms of OCD like an actress, because this could be something that I can latch onto as a final hope for explaining why I am stuck. So stuck so deeply and terribly stuck sitting on my floor next to my bed just scrolling to avoid thinking because any time I start thinking I am left with no answers or help or anything just this swirly feeling. I know I am trying, maybe not my best, but as much as I possibly can. I want to be a Special Education Teacher but I have so much so so so much doubt and uncertainty about every decision I make and everything I know that I can’t get there right now. I can’t do anything right now until it feels ok and then I will. It never feels ok. I know I have to be ok not feeling ok about it. I can be unsure and still be ok. I know it’s just my thinking and my body but I just can’t get past this feeling. And then I know that because I can calm myself and be ok even though I spent 2 hours of my life today already feeling stuck and spinning around and around and around in my head - I don’t feel sure about my OCD and I think it’s a bit of a scam made up by people to cultivate pathology around deep human thought because one day I might figure it out and we all think a lot.
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