- Date posted
- 2y
Feel like crap.
I talk to this one girl online, she’s the coolest and sweetest! But I think she’s going through a tough time with her illness and it just sounds like it keeps getting worse. I had a thought pop up saying “die” at one point, I feel like total shit for it. I was excited this morning because I felt great waking up but when I read her message I felt sorry for her and after a couple of seconds I got that intrusive thought and it felt like I meant it but damn, I know I don’t what the fuck 😔. Now I can’t stop thinking about it. And before I would have intimate thoughts of me and her doing things. but that one I think was legit. It’s cause I like her but when I look back at it it’s such a shitty thing to be thinking about. and yesterday I was with a group of friends and he was complaining about how this chick won’t message him quick and I said don’t worry man I talk to this one chick who I sent a text on Saturday but she just text back yesterday. Just trying to give him an idea like hey yours isn’t as bad as mine. But we’re not even like talking to be bf or gf. I just want to be happy but ocd is def making me feel guilty and wanting to confess to my online friend 😔!