Please any help

I had a lot of unexpected things happen this morning and was just overwhelmed and didn’t go to like the one job interview i’ve gotten. I just felt like i was going to fail it. I know OCD is a lot of procrastination to avoid doing something not perfectly and all of it feels like it’s catching up - like if something won’t go “right” i can’t do it. Any advice besides “dont be afraid to mess up” “everyone makes mistakes” or “nothing in life is perfect” feel like i make more mistakes than most and that there are things that go perfectly and just want to maximize those things but don’t know how to. Didn’t want to go into my interview not ‘perfect’ bc I wasn’t prepared

Username: Genna123

Date posted: 57d ago

I really feel like I can’t do anything if I can’t do it perfect. Like growing up if I knew I couldn’t get an A on a test i would just intentionally fail it to intentionally create imperfection instead of just inherently being imperfect. Im this way with everything- if it can’t be perfect then i “self-sabotage” ( i hate that word cause feel like it implies im constantly doing things to hurt myself when really it just is my natural response and all i’ve known that has created short term peace but long term distress but it has affected everything- it has gotten to the point before where i can’t even eat if it doesn’t feel “perfect”

Username: Genna123

Date posted: 57d ago

@Genna123 Obviously i can type if it’s not perfect but if i even start correcting one thing i know i’ll feel uncomfortable about everything

Username: Erin P

Date posted: 57d ago

@Genna123 Please get help for your OCD. The food thing could be the start of OCD based ARFID - foods not seeming right or perfect would be ARFID in my opinion. ARFID nearly killed me but being such a mess from it made me get the care I needed for my OCD.

Username: Genna123

Date posted: 57d ago

@Erin P Thank you❤️

Username: Erin P

Date posted: 57d ago

@Genna123 ❤️

Username: Erin P

Date posted: 57d ago

No matter what you do things may not go perfectly bc not everything is under your control. I was late to my very first job interview bc I had the location wrong and had to bike on the freeway to get there. But I got the job and it was a wonderful first summer job. I’ve been through tons of interviews since then and some of the ones that became non offers are ones where things went wrong. So based on my personal experience it’s better to take the risk. I’m sure you know that’s also the way to deal with OCD - accept not perfect / feeling anxious.