- Date posted
- 2y ago
Toxic relationships
Has anyone else been in a toxic relationship or suffered from narcissistic emotional abuse and your OCD got so much worse?
Has anyone else been in a toxic relationship or suffered from narcissistic emotional abuse and your OCD got so much worse?
Absolutely. I felt like i was qbout to have a mental breakdown. I only dated the guy for a month and i was ready to go to the loony bin. All the gaslighting and manipulation always makes you doubt yourself and so it makes it so much worse. My advice would be to leave, usually even with rocd you can logically see their treatment of you isnt good, it took a lot of bravery for me to take that chance bc i doubted myself that the whole thing was just in my head (like he said it was) but im so glad i did.
Gaslighting + OCD is such a bad combo, I feel like it hits us way harder since our disorder feeds on doubt
@Neutrino Agreed
@Neutrino 100%.
I relate to this post so much. Was in a relationship with a narcissist and after we broke up it took me two years to start feeling better. My OCD was so bad when I was with him because he would constantly gaslight me (tell me my feelings weren't valid, tell me things never happened the way they did) and every day was an emotional roller coaster. If you are still in that relationship then LEAVE ASAP! Narcissists will destroy every part of you. Wishing you the best!
@Anonymous I left last July. He moved on right away. But of course since then, he sends me messages all the time about how he loves me and misses me and doesn’t love his girlfriend. I’ve tried blocking him but he always finds a way to message. I feel like it just keeps making the OCD worse.
@Catlove9 What’s coming up for your OCD with him contacting you?
@Razz14 It’s hard to explain. I feel like it’s just triggering. Because it gives me anxiety so when I get anxiety, my intrusive thoughts run crazy.
@Catlove9 - Of course he moved on quickly. Narcissists always need to have "supply". If you keep answering him, you'll continue to be his "supply". The only way is to go no contact. Do not speak to him. Do not engage with him in any way. This can feel torturous, but you know that he'll hurt you again. He won't change, but you can change what you do from here.
@Catlove9 Yeah that sucks. I had a similar experience and the doubt was intense. He kept trying to maintain contact but I had to stop responding also I told him he was the problem which no narcissist wants to hear.
@Razz14 I have tried no contact but I always cave. I will keep trying
Hey guys! So I struggle with OCD, especially harm, relationship and moral stuff and I am somewhat recovered now. However, my current girlfriend has started showing signs of OCD but it’s abou5 something I don’t know much about so I wanted to see if anyone on here had thoughts about it. She is constantly thinking about food (when to eat it, what is healthy, what is too much, what is too little) and controls the thoughts by giving in and controlling her entire day around food. She don’t really know the feeling of being full. She never starved herself and always eats, but then she feels extremely guilty afterwards. Her thoughts do have to do a lot with her body image and not gaining weight but also not losing any either. Does this sound like ocd or an eating disorder?
So, I know my capacity to get fixated on things. And it's normally something that's relatively remote but, my latest issue is really getting to me and I was wondering if people have any advice. I'm avoiding getting too into specifics, as I don't want this to get reassurance-y but, in essence.. I came to the realisation recently that people who I'd been "friends" (feels like the wrong term now) when I was younger were not very nice people, and normalized a lot of very unpleasant behaviour towards other members of the group. They really normalized it, sold themselves as figures of authority, as older and more responsible and grown-up than others, and looking back, they acted horribly. And coming to this realisation, that I'd been manipulated into just accepting their behaviour has just... broken me. My OCD has latched onto it and I can't stop feeling irreversibly tainted by it. I've talked to others about it, and they've reassured me, told me it's not a big deal and that I hold myself to too high a standard, but none of that sticks. I feel better for a bit, then think 'Maybe when you told them you were skewing it to make yourself look better' or 'Did you leave out a crucial detail'. I keep ruminating over and over, trying to remember exactly how everything played out, trying to figure out if I fed into the behaviour, if I did something bad myself (because y'know, I feel like I was accepting of it at the time, so what does it say about my own values?). I know I need to stop doing all this if I want to improve, but then some part of me keeps saying 'So, you're just going to let yourself off the hook then?' Normally, I can rationalize my own fears to some degree, assure myself something won't happen, but the realness of the situation, and the fact I only came to understand the reality of it because the thought had been bothering me means it feels so much more all-encompassing. I know confessing in itself is a compulsion, but I keep feeling that if I'm not I'm somehow concealing what I 'really am' from others around me, and any positive interactions are me deceiving them in some way. I feel like I can't enjoy anything in life right now, and a good part of me feels I should not enjoy it ever again. If anybody has any advice on it, I'm all ears. Or even hearing if you relate to these feelings, I might appreciate the solidarity at least.
Has anyone experienced their reputation affected or misunderstood because of a societally taboo OCD theme? Others catching wind of your obsessions and misinterpreting it, assuming the worst? I’m intentionally keeping it vague because I don’t want my specific situation to get reassured, but it’s been a real tough pill to swallow knowing that people close to me (and anyone else they might talk to) think of me differently. I’m unwilling to share about my OCD because I feel pretty confident it will be taken as an excuse or denial, and feels compulsive and reassurance seeking. Let me know if anyone here has experienced anything like it, how they handled it, exposures you did.
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