I’m not sure if anyone has had this fear, but i’m worried that if i actually get better with erp and face my harm ocd that one day the thought of hurting others won’t scare me anymore. Has anyone else had this fear?
Been there! So if the thought of hurting others doesn’t scare you anymore I’d say the ERP worked! Thoughts are just thoughts. Scary thought enters “huh, that was weird, whatever “ and move on. I’m on the tail end of my therapy and recover is SO worth it. I still get weird, sometime scary thoughts but at this point knowing what they are and don’t mean anything laugh at them and move on. Do I get stuck sometimes? Absolutely, but not as bad or as much as before. What’s better…living a full filling life in recovery and enjoying life or always living in the “what ifs” (one of OCDs favorite tricks). Do the therapy…..YOU GOT THIS!!! 👍🤜
@signmanwithOCD Thanks so much for your input! I’m going to be seeing a therapist soon, and I haven’t gotten over the first hunch of being scared of hurting others yet. I was worried that further on down the road i wouldn’t be “scared enough”. OCD has some f*cked up mind games.
Trust me, you'll get to the stage where you'll be able to acknowledge the intrusive: "attack people" thoughts, as mere silly OCD intrusive thoughts, because without the anxiety ruling them and your perception of you, the thoughts won't scare you anymore, as you start re-realising they were never a reflection of your soul, and, fun fact, you'll get a shit tonne of euphoria the moment you begin re-understanding this. It was only ever your brain wanting the worst for you. Our brains hate us :) Seriously though, once the storm blows over, your head will clear and you'll start re-seeing your life/intentions for how it were before, genuine. I've been through it all, you just have to trust the process. For the sake of your mental, you need to accept the uncertainty of your concern regarding not feeling sick at the thought of being evil. You're not evil! Your brain just temporarily wants nothing but for you to think that! When you're in the thick of it, though, it's easy to feel trapped as fuck, and like you're gonna be trapped forever, but I can't stress this enough, you will overcome this and that'll be a beautiful day for you! I still, every now and again, intrusively imagine hurting people, like if I'm talking to a kind person, I'd imagine just straight up folding them, but because I'm long past the debilitating anxiety that once came with that, I see it for how it is... Silly!!! And the short lived thought disappears with no reaction, why? Because I know I'd never do that shit. With time it's gets easier, and to the point you're free of all of it. Whitney, it's funy, you're worried about what you should be striving towards!!! Not being scared of the thoughts. The only reason you ever fell into this fucked cycle, was because little miss burden brain latches onto shit you despise most, right now it's being a violent, bad person. Hope this helped. Bless your journey, it's all in the mind. Have faith. I know you'll overcome this!
@pure acceptance I really needed this, thanks for sharing :)
Yup! Right now, I kinda don’t want to do erp because what if I’m not scared anymore and then I act on the thoughts ? I rather be sacred, it’s almost like a way of protection
@68273 This is exactly how i feel. I don’t want to have this fear anymore, but i also don’t want this to be something i’m “used to”
Hello- I have been battling many types of OCD on and off for 25+ years. Medication works but wanted to go off for 1st trimester of pregnancy. I am doing a good job deploying ERP tactics for pure o and real event ocd and it has removed physically anxiety symptoms and I can concentrate in life. However I do have a big sense of fear and all day gloomy feeling knowing that the thoughts that are disturbing are sitting out there and fear I will come up with new ones. Will this get better the longer I keep deploying the ERP tactics? I never have this when I am on medication. Thanks in advance.
Scared about starting erp. Afraid I'll become a different person or that I'll become what I've been fearing and obessessing over. Will the therapy depress me and lead me to something like suicide. Not that I am suicidal but I am afraid I would get so sad or disheartened that I become that.
I don’t like the ERP for Harm OCD because I feel like I’m careless purposely to prove something to myself like I feel like I genuinely try to do something. Has anyone else felt this way?
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